The Ties That Bind
by redsandman99
Summary: Cooper thought he had a pretty simple life. But when the secret he was never supposed to know is exposed, it pulls him down the path of his own self-destruction.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I know I don't need to start yet another story but uh...I am. This one won't leave me alone so I might as well get to it.**

**Set back in 1998 so angsty teenage Cooper will be on full display once this thing gets going.**

**...**

"_Mommy? Can you tell me a story?"_

_Annabelle sat back in her chair, her fingers absently playing with Cooper's unruly bright red hair. "What story do you want me to tell you?" she asked, knowing that there were lots of them that he liked to hear._

"_Tell me a new one," he said, snuggling up to her and resting his head on her chest. "I want a new one."_

"_Okay." Annabelle was quiet for a moment as she thought up of a story he had not yet heard. When she came up with one, she began to speak again. "Once upon a time, there was a little boy and little girl who were trapped in a house with their mother and father. Their father was a loud drunk that liked to yell and their mother was the ultimate ice queen. Cold, mean, heartless…for years the little boy and the little girl were trapped and there was no way out for either of them. But as the years went by, the little boy grew up to be big and strong and he killed the evil parents so he and the little girl could live happily ever after."_

_Cooper rubbed his eyes. "That's good," he said, trying to hide the fact that he was going to yawn soon. "I don't like mean mommies and daddies. Don't be mean to me, okay Mommy?"_

_Annabelle nodded. "Okay." She kissed the top of his head. "I think it's time for you to go to bed now."_

_He shook his head stubbornly. "No Mommy. I want to stay up and wait for Daddy."_

"_Daddy and Uncle Mark are going to be out late tonight," she said gently. "And you've got school tomorrow."_

"_So? Daddy says there's no point to preschool anyway." He made his pouty face in hopes that he would get his way._

_Annabelle shook her head. "I think you need to go to bed," she said, leaning forward so she could whisper in his ear. "I heard the Tickle Monster might come over tonight and see if you're staying up past your bed time. You don't want that do you?"_

_Cooper shook his head. He knew exactly what the Tickle Monster was and he did not like it. "Tell him no Mommy," he ordered. "Tell him to stay away or I'll have Daddy smash his head in. Okay?"_

_Annabelle smiled. "Okay. I'll make sure to do that. Now it's time for you to go to bed."_

The sound of his alarm going off woke Cooper from his slumber, causing him to groan and reach blindly for the damn clock. "Bastard thing," he muttered when he couldn't find it. "Where the hell are you?"

"It might help if you actually look this way."

Cooper's head snapped in that direction, his eyes widening when he saw Joie sitting there with a big grin on his face. "Holy shit," he muttered, sitting up and staring at his best (and only) friend in disbelief. "When the hell did you get here?"

"Just a few minutes ago," Joie replied. "Poppa James let me in." His pale green eyes were twinkling in amusement. "So you're not a fan of the Tickle Monster?"

Cooper groaned. He hated it when he slept talk. He started to turn over so he could try to go back to sleep but then he noticed the mischievous look on Joie's face. Catching on to what was being planned, he quickly rolled out of bed before he was pounced on. "Oh hell no!" he exclaimed.

"Aw, come on," Joie said as he got up to his feet and started bouncing on the bed.

"No way," Cooper refused. "You and whatever diabolical plans you have need to stay over there."

"Sorry Coopy, that ain't gonna happen." Joie jumped at Cooper, who easily managed to catch him and throw him over his shoulders. Joie squealed and started trying to get free, but he wasn't going anywhere unless Cooper wanted him too. The size difference between them was very big, with Joie only being about five foot seven and 150 pounds soaking wet and Cooper being almost a foot taller and fifty pounds heavier. "Cooper!" Joie whined. "Put me down!"

"You gonna behave?" Cooper asked.

"Yes," Joie said.

Cooper decided to believe him and put him down on his feet. Joie huffed and slapped Cooper's chest before trying to smooth down his clothes and straighten out his blonde wig. "Damn it, look what you did," he pouted.

"Me? I'm not the one who started pouncing at people." Cooper reached out to touch the wig but got his hand slapped for his trouble. "I was just trying to help," he pouted.

"The last time you tried to help, you got it all tangled up," Joie pointed out. He went over to the mirror to make sure he looked alright.

"Did you raid your cousin's closet again?" Cooper asked, taking in Joie's pink tank top, skinny jeans and six inch heels that looked like they were meant to kill people's ankles.

"Yup," Joie replied. "I had to. Dad burned all my clothes."

Cooper sighed. Joie's dad absolutely despised the fact that Joie was a cross dresser and he did everything he could to make Joie's life a living hell. "You need to start just keeping a whole bunch of shit here," he said. "You know we'll protect it."

"Yeah well, I'll keep that in mind," Joie said. "Now come on. Let's go get something to eat."

"Hold your horses," Cooper said, letting Joie change the subject because he knew the whole dad thing was a sensitive subject for him. "Let me get dressed. I'm not going downstairs in my boxers. Dad will start complaining because I bitch at him when he does the same thing."

Joie laughed. "Yeah but at least you're not covered in Mark hickeys when you run around shirtless." He sighed as he watched Cooper put on a black AC/DC t-shirt and a pair of ripped up jeans. "I miss the red. Why did you have to go to brown?"

Cooper touched his hair (which was what Joie was talking about) and shook his head. "I hate the red. I look like a fucking clown." He slipped on his combat boots and stuck his wallet and his knife in his pocket. "Now come on. I need to go make sure Dad isn't trying to burn this place down by making breakfast."

Lucky for them, they discovered that James was going the cereal route that morning. "Hi Joie!" Connor greeted, waving with the hand that was not trying to stuff Rice Krispies into his mouth.

"Hi Connor," Joie greeted back.

Cooper rolled his eyes at little brother. "You're getting that all over your face," he pointed out.

"So?" Connor asked with a shrug. He looked at James, who was pouring himself a bowl of Lucky Charms. "Daddy, I want to kill some people today, okay?"

"Not at school you're not," James said as he handed Cooper and Joie their bowls and let them have their pick of the cereals that were on the table.

Connor let out a loud whine. "Why not?"

"Because I said no," James replied. "I'll take you out to kill someone later, alright?"

"But Daddy, the kids on the playground call me a retard," Connor complained. "And the teachers keep trying to put me in that stupid special class."

"Well fuck them then," James said. "Kick the little brats in their face and tell the teachers to go fuck themselves."

Cooper rolled his eyes and just focused on eating his food. Connor had tons of issues in school, the main one being his overly short attention span causing him to be disruptive and unruly the whole day through. That was the main reason the teachers wanted to hand him off to Special Ed, although the fact that he could barely read or write his own name probably didn't help matters.

"Look on the bright side honey," Joie said, doing his best to cheer up Connor. "We've only got a couple more days of school left and then we've got the whole summer to do whatever we want."

Connor tilted his head to the side. "But I want to do what I want NOW!" He picked up his bowl of cereal and threw it down on the ground, making a huge mess.

"Damn it Connor!" James groaned.

"Spot!" Cooper yelled, banging on the table to make sure the dog heard him. "Come here boy! You want food?"

It took a couple minutes, but their Old English Sheepdog came in and made a beeline for the spilled food. "Good boy," Cooper said, reaching over and petting Spot's back. His parents had gotten him Spot for seventh birthday so he was the one that was closest to the animal.

"Mark and Crispy Critter are coming home tomorrow night," James said. "Can you two watch Connor while Mark and I go out?"

Cooper shrugged. "I guess." Babysitting wasn't on his list of things to do if he could help it, but he didn't feel like arguing with his dad about it.

"Sweet." James looked much happier now. "Oh and I guess Bearer wants to come by for a visit soon too…so uh, please make plans to help me torture him, alright?"

Cooper and Connor nodded. Neither of them could stand Bearer and loved to help torment him. "Daddy?" Connor said.

"Yeah?"

"I--" A loud bang from outside startled all of them and James began cursing loudly as he got to his feet and went to go see what was going on. "Damn it! Those idiot neighbors better not have hit my car with that damn basketball again! I'll fucking kill them if they did!"

Cooper shook his head. _They probably did…hopefully Dad saves enough of them for me so I can play with them when I get home from school._


	2. Chapter 2

Cooper rested his chin in his hand and sighed. After sleeping through first period study hall (once upon a time he had welding during that time, but he got kicked out for trying to brand someone right on the neck) he found himself stuck in English, which was one of the banes of his existence. He really wished that he had just skipped, but Joie had made him promise that he would start trying to fix his attendance record a little bit. Apparently school was supposed to be important or some shit like that.

"Your final test is going to cover everything that we have read this past semester," Mrs. Jones informed them, acting like anyone really gave a shit. "And it will all be in essay format so there will be no way to cheat on this."

About three fourths of the class groaned at this announcement. Mrs. Jones frowned at them before launching into one of her dreaded lectures. "You learn nothing by cheating. Copying what someone else puts prevents knowledge--"

"Cheating us teaches us how to be sneaky," Cooper blurted out, causing every head in the room to turn in his direction. "And you have to be sneaky if you're going to be a ninja."

Mrs. Jones glared at him while the girls giggled. "A ninja Mr. Lawson?"

"Yeah," Cooper said. He loved being a smartass to her just because she got so riled up about it. "Ninjas are fucking awesome."

"Language Mr. Lawson!"

He rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Come on Gertrude, lighten up. It's not like anyone is actually taking this test seriously. I mean, who cares about Romeo and Juliet? I saw that movie and Leonardo DiCaprio was a total twink who was totally in love with his friend Mercutio. Juliet was just his cover because he was too much of a pussy to come out of the closet. And Macbeth and Hamlet? Fucking morons the both of them."

"That's enough Lawson."

"Why? Why is it enough? I haven't even gotten started yet."

"And you're not going to," Mrs. Jones snapped. She pointed to the door. "Principal's office, NOW!"

He snorted and got up to his feet. "Thank God. I thought you were never going to say that." He grabbed his bag and vacated the room as fast as he could. It wasn't the fastest he had ever been kicked out of her class, but at least he was free now. Now he just had to figure out what the fuck he was going to do next.

_What to do what to do,_ he thought as he wandered around the building aimlessly. At first he couldn't come up with anything but then he happened to walk past the computer lab and suddenly inspiration struck him. He looked around to make sure the coast was clear before trying to go into the room. The door was locked so he pulled out the stretched out paper clips he had in his pocket and picked the lock so he could get in there. "Ha," he said in triumph when he entered the room and relocked the door behind him. "I win." He went over to the nearest computer and fired it up. Once it was ready to go, he used it to hack into the teacher's email system and sent each and every single one of them a nice little bit of porn. "Merry Christmas bitches," he muttered when he was done, turning off the computer and sneaking back out of the room without being seen.

The bell rang, signaling the end of second period. As the people began coming out of the classrooms, he pushed past all of them and headed towards his locker. He and Joie had P.E. next, but he had no intention of going to that class. Coach Henderson was a complete moron and almost everyone else in the class was either a jock or a cheerleader. Basically, it was Hell 101.

Just as Cooper was getting to his locker, a loud commotion coming from near the staircase caught his attention. Several cries of fights reached his ears and he immediately went over to see what was going on. "Out of my way!" he ordered, shoving several people aside. "Move damn it! I--oh fuck."

Clayton Rice and Dan Richardson (two of the biggest and dumbest jocks in the entire city) had a hold of Joie and were beating the crap out of him. Cooper jumped into the fray instantly, punching Clayton right in the nose and shattering his nose with one punch. Dan let Joie go and tried to lunge at him, but Cooper dodged him easily and smashed him face first into the wall.

"What the fuck did I tell you about coming after him?" Cooper snarled. He had done this way too many times before and he was really getting sick of it.

"Break it up!" Mr. Davis yelled. He was the principal of the school and he generally never did anything until the damage was done. "Break it up! Do it now Lawson!"

Cooper glared at the balding middle aged man, absolutely enraged about being singled out like he had been one to start this mess. "They did it!" he growled. "They fucking started it!"

Mr. Davis shook his head. "I don't care who started it," he replied. "You're all coming to my office right now."

"Fuck you," was Cooper's response to that. He knew damn well that neither Clayton or Dan were going to get into trouble for this. It was all going to be put on him and Joie and he was not going to listen to that bullshit.

"Excuse me?" Mr. Davis asked angrily.

"I said fuck you," Cooper repeated. He shoved the bastard on his ass before grabbing Joie and getting him the hell out of there.

"You shouldn't have done that," Joie said as they got in Cooper's car. "You could get expelled for that."

"I don't give a shit," Cooper said. He leaned over and carefully began checking Joie's face. He already had a bruise on his cheek and his left eye was beginning to swell up. "Jesus fucking Christ," he said unhappily. "I'm going to kill them."

Joie shook his head. "Don't bother" He took off his wig and set it down on his lap. "They're not worth it."

"Oh yes they are," Cooper disagreed. He started his car up and burned rubber as he drove out of the parking lot. "They can't keep fucking with you like this. If I hadn't gotten there when I did--"

"But you got there," Joie pointed pout. "Now please, just calm down. You look like you're about to pop a blood vessel or something."

Cooper sighed and rubbed his temples. He didn't want to calm down any time soon. All he wanted to do was cause an extreme amount of violence to the people that were always out to get his friend. "Fucking hell JoJo," he said with a sigh. "You can't accept getting beat on like this. This is absolutely fucking ridiculous."

"Yeah but what else am I supposed to do?" Joie asked with a shrug. "Without you around I'm pretty much a walking target. I mean, I try to defend myself but let's face facts: I'm going to be forever screwed."

"You are not going to be forever screwed," Cooper said firmly. He stopped at a stop light and gave Joie a stern look. "I'm not going to let you be forever screwed." He reached out and smoothed down the short black hair Joie always kept hidden under his wigs. "You hear me?"

Joie grinned. "Awe, that's so sweet." He leaned over and kissed Cooper on the cheek. "My protector."

Cooper felt his face flush as he looked into Joie's eyes. A very real tension suddenly filled the car, making it hard for both of them to breathe. James always teased Cooper about secretly being in love with Joie, but Cooper always denied it vehemently. But there were moments like this when they were all alone together that he started to wonder…

The car behind them began honking them at, bringing them out of the trance that they were in. Cooper looked out the windshield and saw that the light had turned green. "Shit," he muttered. He quickly took his foot off the brake and started going again.

Joie grinned sheepishly before putting his wig back on. "Whoops."

Cooper nodded in agreement, trying to ignore the weird tingly feelings he had. "Want to go get some ice cream?" he asked.

"At Dairy Queen?" Joie asked hopefully.

"If it's Dairy Queen you want, it's Dairy Queen we shall go."


	3. Chapter 3

"The ants go marching one by one, hurrah! Hurrah! The ants go marching six by ten, hurrah! Hurrah! The ants go marching till I stomp them in itty bitty bits and eat them with my soup! And I go marching down, to the ground, to get out of the rain."

Joie began to giggle uncontrollably as Cooper's lips twitched into a smile. "How long has he been singing that?" he asked James.

"For nearly an hour now," James asked, not taking his eyes off Connor, who continued to sing and march around the yard. "He keeps mixing up all the songs and I think I might get motion sickness if he marches in another circle."

"Come on Spot, march with me!" Connor yelled.

Spot just continued to just lay under the tree, panting and staring at Connor with a happy expression on his face.

"Suit yourself!" Connor shook off Spot's rejection and continued to march around the yard and sing at the top of his lungs. "Old McDonald had a farm and Bingo was his name-o! "B-I-N-G-O! B-I-N-G-O! B-I-N-G-Oh look, Mark's here!"

Cooper groaned as Mark's truck pulled into the driveway. He had not been looking forward to this.

James put his hand on Cooper's shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. "I know you're not happy about this but can you at least try not to egg him on? I don't want this to end in another fight."

Cooper rolled his eyes. James was always trying to keep the peace between him and Mark, but it never really worked out that well. Mark disliked Cooper for some reason that was unknown to Cooper, and Cooper didn't like Mark for a whole boat load of reasons, the main one being that he thought Mark treated James like crap. The two of them were always fighting about something, and in Cooper's mind, he saw Mark as the source of a lot of those fights. All the wrestling and all the traveling caused him to drink heavily, which didn't help the fact that there was tons of tension stemming from the fact that Mark was still married to Jodi, even though he was always saying that he was going to leave her and come back to James for good. Cooper thought it was a bunch of bullshit. He believed Mark was just using James and he wished his dad would throw the son of a bitch out for good.

Joie could sense that Cooper was becoming agitated and he gently pulled him into the house. "Come on, there's no need to get worked up over him. He's not worth it."

"But Dad--"

"Is an adult and can make his own decisions," Joie said gently. "And when they're not fighting, he seems very happy with Mark."

"But they're almost _always_ fighting!" Cooper pointed out. He kicked one of Connor's toy cars as hard as he could, making it fly across the room and making it bounce off the wall. He shook his head in disgust. "Mark is an asshole and Dad deserves better than him." He grabbed the phone and then looked at the numbers that were taped up to the fridge. "Should I order pizza or Chinese?"

"Pizza," Joie replied. "We just had Chinese three nights ago."

"Okay." Cooper made the call and ordered six large pepperoni pizzas, not caring about the fact that people could potentially want a different kind. If they didn't like pepperoni then they were just going to have to eat something else.

After the order was placed, he heard something going on in the hallway so he poked his head back out there and discovered James and Mark making out. "There are children in the house you know!" he said loudly, ignoring the smack Joie gave him for purposefully trying to start something.

Mark broke away from James and shook his head. "Connor's outside," he grunted. "Now go away."

"Make me," Cooper replied, going over to the window by the door so he could look out it and see what Connor was up to. As it turned out, Mark had brought Glenn with him so he was the one entertaining Connor now. "You should have brought Owen. Connor's been begging to see him for ages now."

Mark just grunted and shook his head. "Owen's got a family of his own boy. He don't need to cater to Connor's needs."

Cooper glared at him. "Don't call me boy you--"

"I think it's time to go away now," James said, grabbing Mark's hand and dragging him upstairs. "We've got a lot of catching up to do." Catching up meant the two of them were going to have loud obnoxious sex, so both Cooper and Joie decided it was better to go back outside rather than listening to it.

"Coopy! Joie! Come play with me and Uncle Glenn!" Connor yelled.

"Yes please," Glenn begged. He looked desperate to have some help with Connor. "Please come play with us."

"Okay," Joie agreed. He looked at Cooper, who shook his head. "You go ahead. I'll watch."

Joie rolled his eyes. "Spoil sport," he complained, playfully shoving Cooper before running over to join Connor and Glenn. Cooper shook his head in amusement before going over to Spot and sitting down next to him. "Hey buddy," he said, scratching Spot behind his ears. "You're not going to start acting like an asshole like Mark, right?"

Spot looked up at him and licked his hand in response.

"That's a good boy," Cooper said. He hugged his dog tightly and kissed the top of his head.

"Wheeeee!" Connor screamed, running around the yard like a madman. He, Joie and Glenn were playing tag and he was easily avoiding the other two. "You'll never catch me! You'll never catch me!" And for twenty whole minutes, it seemed like he was right. But the game suddenly came to an end when he tripped over his feet and busted his knees and elbows up on the cement. "Owie!" he cried out as he hit the ground. "Daddy!"

Cooper sighed and got up to his feet. "You're alright Connor," he said, shaking his head as Joie and Glenn began checking his little brother over. "Come on, brush it off."

Connor pouted at him. "But I fell down!" he whined.

"I know you did buddy." Cooper replied. He easily picked Connor up and started carrying him into the house.

"I wants a lollypop," Connor announced, wrapping his arms around Cooper's neck and resting his head on his shoulder. "You'll get me a lollypop won't you Coopy?"

"If you stop calling me that," Cooper replied.

"Okay Coopy."

Cooper just rolled his eyes and took Connor into the house. After getting the blood cleaned up from his elbows and knees, Cooper bandaged him up, gave him his lollypop and sent him on his way. Somewhere during that the pizza arrived, and when he came out to the kitchen, James and Mark had joined them again. James was wearing nothing but his boxer shorts and his chest and stomach were covered in hickeys and bite marks, and Mark was already getting into the whiskey, which was not a good sign.

"Uncle Mark, when are you going to bring Uncle Owen to visit us again?" Connor asked after getting a root beer in the fridge. Since Cooper was allowed to drink real beer, he had started throwing fits about how he wanted to do that too. So one day James started cleaning out empty Budweiser bottles really well and pouring root beer in them and Connor had still not figured out that he was being tricked. Cooper supposed that it was one of the advantages to having Connor not be the most the brightest bulb in the universe.

"I'm not in charge of him," Mark grunted. "He can come visit you on his own damn time."

James elbowed Mark in the ribs. "Behave," he hissed. "Alright? You promised--"

"I didn't do anything!" Mark growled, acting like everyone else wasn't there hearing this.

Cooper shook his head and stuffed his piece of pizza into his mouth. He was going to try with all his might to keep his mouth his shut, but he could already tell that was going to be an ugly task to try to accomplish. Cooper was not going to tolerate Mark being rude to Connor. He was the only one who was allowed to do that. Everyone else had to go answer to him if they tried it.

Connor shook off Mark's response and looked earnestly at Glenn. "We has to get Owen here you know. He needs to be part of the wedding."

Glenn frowned. "Wedding?"

"Yeah. Cooper and Joie are getting married!"

Cooper choked on his pizza while Joie sprayed his Mountain Dew everywhere and James looked at them incredulously. "You two are _engaged_?!" he yelled. "When the hell did you even start dating?"

Cooper had to cough violently and gasp for air before he could answer. "We're not engaged," he said firmly. And we're not dating." He glared at Connor. "Where did you even get that idea?"

Connor glared back at him. "Because I said you were dummy."

"But we're not--"

"You're going to!"

"No we're--"

Connor picked up a fork and tossed it at Cooper's face. "I said you were!" he hollered.

The fork bounced off Cooper's forehead and that was all it took for him to spring into action. He jumped up to his feet and grabbed at Connor, who barely got out of the ring. "Daddy!" he screeched as he ran away. "Help me!"

"Get back here!" Cooper yelled as he chased him. "Right now!"

James just groaned. "Jesus Christ, here we go again!"


	4. Chapter 4

Because he got involved so violently in the Clayton/Dan/Joie scuffle, Cooper found himself finishing the year off being suspended. Now normally he didn't care about that, but he was pretty ticked off that Joie got suspended too for "inappropriate conduct" (which was code for them thinking he brought trouble on himself for dressing like a girl) and Clayton and Dan didn't get punished at all. Still, he wasn't going to fight the system mainly because they were too stupid to even bother with. Plus he was going to deal with Clayton and Dan sooner or later, in a way he saw fit. It was just a matter of getting them all alone at the right place at the right time.

On what would have been his last day of school, he found himself laying down on the couch, trying to find something to watch on TV. Joie's mom was forcing him to go shopping with her, so he wasn't around to hang out with. Mrs. Rosenberg annoyed the shit out of Cooper, not only because she hated him for no good reason, but also because he knew she didn't give a shit about Joie. She let Mr. Rosenberg beat the shit out of him whenever he wanted to and verbally degrade him pretty much every day. Cooper wanted to kill them both so badly, but Joie threw a fit whenever that idea was even approached. He loved his parents even though they treated him like shit. Cooper didn't understand it, but it was just the way Joie was. He was way too forgiving for his own good.

Cooper sighed and shut off the TV. James and Mark were up in their room doing stuff he didn't want to know about, Glenn had gone to see Bearer, so there was no telling when he would be back and Connor was outside playing. "At least you haven't abandoned me," he said as he patted Spot on the head.

Spot wagged his tail and licked Cooper's hand.

The back door suddenly banged open and Connor came running in. "YAY YAY YAY YAY!" he shouted at the top of his lungs, startling both Cooper and Spot. "YAY YA YAY YA YAY!"

"What the hell are you yelling about?" Cooper asked, pursing his lips in disapproval that Spot got up and moved to another spot. He liked having his dog sit with him damn it.

Connor ignored him in favor of running out the front door. Knowing that Connor had tendency to run off, Cooper got up and ran after him, hoping that he wouldn't have to chase him very far this time. Last time Connor had taken off, Cooper had to chase him for ten blocks before he finally caught up with him. The fucker was pretty fucking fast.

"UNCLE OWEN!" Connor shouted, running and jumping into the youngest Hart brother's arms. "HI HI HI HI HI!"

"Hi Connor!" Owen said happily, grunting as held Connor in his arms and hugged him tightly. "Have you been a good boy?"

Connor nodded eagerly. "Uh huh! I've been really good! I've only annoyed Cooper a little bit and not a whole bunch!"

Cooper rolled his eyes and grinned as Bret got out of the driver's seat of the car. "What brings you two all the way here?"

Bret shook his head. "Why do we need a reason to see our two favorite nephews?" he asked, walking up to Cooper and giving him a big hug.

Cooper's grin got bigger and hugged Bret back tightly. "No, I guess you don't," he admitted. He looked at Owen, who was carrying Connor towards the house. "Dad and Mark are busy banging their brains out and Glenn's not here."

"Hey hey hey!" Owen said, attempting to cover up Connor's ears. "Don't talk about that kind of stuff in front of the children."

"Yeah!" Connor agreed. "Don't be a naughty mouth Coopy!"

Cooper rolled his eyes and led Bret and Owen into the house. "You guys want something to eat?" he asked. "Or drink?"

"I'll just get a Coke for myself," Bret replied. He grinned at Owen, who was giving Connor Eskimo kisses. "Owen's got something to show the two of you."

"I sure do," Owen said, reaching into the bag he was holding and pulling out a video tape. "Let's go to the living room. I'm sure you two want to see this."

"What is it?" Connor asked, trying to grab the tape out of Owen's hand.

"A reminder of why you should never drink too much," Owen said. "Believe me, I would rather not show this but Bret is making me. He's a meanie like that."

Bret just smirked. "I may be a meanie, but you love me anyway."

Cooper chuckled and followed Owen into the living room. "You can't deny that, can you?"

"I can't," Owen replied. He set Connor down on the couch before turning the TV and then putting the tape into the VCR. "Remind me to get him back for that later."

"Okay," Cooper said, sitting down next to Connor. Connor giggled and snuggled up to Cooper until Owen sat down. Then he was right back on the blonde haired man's lap. Bret came in moments later and sat down where Connor had been.

"So what is--oh my God," Cooper said, beginning to laugh his ass off. It was footage Bret had shot at last years Wrestlemania after party. James, Owen, and Stone Cold were up on a stage, and while Owen was at least somewhat sober, James and Austin were completely drunk.

_Are you gonna take me home tonight_

_Ah, down beside that red firelight_

_Are you gonna let it all hang ou__t_

_Fat bottomed girls, you make the rockin world go round_

"Oh my God, this is so brutal," Owen said, turning red in embarrassment.

"It is," Cooper agreed. None of the three men on the television were known for their singing skills, and adding in the fact that they were drunk when this karaoke moment was taking place, it just made it all the more painful to listen to.

On the tape, James started trying to sing a solo as Owen and Steve got into a slap fight.

_Hey, I was just a skinny lad_

_Never knew no good from bad_

_But I knew life before I left my nursery_

_Left alone with big fat Fanny_

_She was such a naughty nanny_

_Heap big woman, you made a bad boy out of me, Hey hey!_

Connor put his hands over his ears. "Daddy sings really bad," he said, shaking his head in disapproval.

"He does," Bret agreed. "That's why this is so funny." He rolled his eyes as James took his shirt off and threw it out into the crowd. "I still haven't figured out why he did that though."

Cooper rolled his eyes. "Dad doesn't need a reason to take his shirt off. He just likes running around without clothes on.

On the tape, Austin was now snatching the microphone away from James so his voice could be heard.

_I've been singing with my band_

_Across the wire, across the land_

_I seen every blue eyed floozy on the way_

_But their beauty and their style_

_Went kind of smooth after a whileT_

_ake me to them dirty ladies everytime, come on_

"What the fuck are you people listening to?" Mark growled as he stormed into the room, closely followed by James. He looked highly pissed off, like usual.

"Hey, that's me!" James exclaimed, looking at the TV and seeing what was being played. "Damn I look good!"

Mark rolled his eyes. "Yeah yeah. Too bad you sound like shit."

James gave Mark a hurt look. "You don't like my singing Marky?"

"Hell no. You sound like you're fucking getting murdered or some shit."

Cooper snorted. "Oh please. You don't sound any better."

Mark glared at him. "Yeah well at least I don't run around _acting_ like I can fucking sing in the first place. And who told you to speak? Just shut up and watch your father act like an ass on TV."

Cooper scowled. 'I don't need your permission to speak asshole. This is my house and--"

"This ain't your fucking house. This is James's house and--"

"Mark stop," James ordered, trying to stop the fight before it got too far. "Just stop."

"Yeah man, just chill out a little bit," Owen said, doing his best to distract Connor from all the fighting. "You two are always fighting for no reason at all."

"He starts it," Cooper accused.

Mark rolled his eyes. "Oh yes, blame someone else. That's what you Lawsons are good at."

"And you're good at being a fucking dick," Cooper snapped.

"Cooper," James said, obviously getting agitated now. "Don't--"

"Why are you taking his side?" Cooper asked incredulously.

"I'm not taking his side!" James said defensively. "I told him to stop first!"

Bret shook his head before getting up. "Come on Cooper," he said. "Let's go."

Cooper sighed and followed the older man out of the house. "I can't fucking stand him," he growled as they began to walk around the block aimlessly. "I can't. I don't know what Dad sees in him."

"He's different when they're alone," Bret said with a shrug. "I've watched them when they thought nobody else is around. Mark's not a people person--"

"You can say that again," Cooper muttered.

"--but the way he treats you is completely out of line," Bret finished. "It's like he's looking for a reason to get you riled up."

Cooper seriously almost hugged Bret right then and there. "Thank you! Thank you for fucking seeing that! Dad is completely blind to it."

"No, he's not blind," Bret said with a shake of his head. "He's just denying it's going on. Mark being married to Jodi and doing things with other women while out on the road--"

"Wait, he's cheating on Dad with women who aren't his wife?" Cooper asked, becoming even more disgusted with the Deadman than before.

"Yeah," Bret confirmed. "Well, at least he was when I was in the company."

"And you never told Dad?"

"No. Don't give me that look Cooper. What Mark is doing is wrong but I'm not getting those unsuspecting women killed by doing the right thing and telling your dad. I'm not adding to the body count like that."

Cooper sighed. If Bret wasn't going to tell James what Mark was doing, he was going to have to do it himself. "Are you going to be at my birthday party?"

Bret nodded. "Definitely. WCW is such a mess I can probably not show up without telling anyone and not have my absence noticed."

Cooper grinned. "Cool." He sighed. "Can you do me a favor?"

"Sure."

"Can you help make sure Mark isn't at my party? I mean, I'm sure he'll more than likely be on the road, but if he's not, I don't want him here. And Dad doesn't exactly listen to me when it comes to him."

Bret nodded. "I can try my best."

"Thanks Uncle Bret."

"Any time kiddo."


	5. Chapter 5

James sighed as he tossed his dirty clothes around, dreading the laundry that needed to be done sooner rather than later. "Bret told me Cooper doesn't want you at his party," he said, glancing over at his lover.

Mark didn't really react to that news at all. "I wasn't under the impression that I was invited," he said gruffly. "Boy hates me."

James rolled his eyes. "Well who's fault is that? All you do is act like an asshole to him."

This time Mark didn't say anything in response. They both knew it was the truth, so there was no point in hiding from it. James again, very unhappy with the fact that Mark had to be like this. He knew that Mark had always regretted having that one night stand with Annabelle and saw Cooper as a constant reminder of that little hookup. But still, James didn't see why Mark had to take his anger out on the poor kid. It wasn't Cooper's fault that the whole mess happened in the first place.

"I caught Connor trying to break into the neighbor's house," Mark said, not looking up from his newspaper. "You need to talk to that boy and put some sense into him."

"I'll get right on that," James sneered, not giving a shit about the neighbor's house.

"And you need to talk to Cooper about his attitude. He's pissing me off."

James snorted. "His attitude? How about your attitude? You're being a complete and total asshole." He got up and snatched the newspaper out of Mark's hands before sitting on the long haired man's lap. "I hate it when you get like this." He rested his head on Mark's shoulder, closing his eyes and wishing that he could force Mark to be nicer. Once upon a time he might have been able to do that, but between Mark being out on the road and drinking the hard shit every single night and Mark sometimes going home to Jodi and Gunner, James usually felt like he was doing all he could just to hold on to Mark so he didn't lose him completely. Despite being a major prick, James knew he wouldn't be able to handle losing Mark completely. He didn't really admit it out loud, but he depended on Mark in ways that would make Cooper gag if he knew about them. He needed to have Mark in his life…but what hurt was that lately he wasn't sure if Mark felt the same way about him. And that really really hurt.

"Let's go get a drink," Mark said, kissing James's neck before trying to get him to get up.

James sighed. It wasn't even night time yet but Mark wanted a drink. _I have got to get him to stop this. This is starting to get way out of hand._

…

"Fucking stupid," Cooper muttered as he scaled the side of Joie's house so he could climb in through the bedroom window. Joie's parents hated him so Joie tried to get him to sneak in whenever possible in order to avoid fights. Cooper thought it was absolutely ridiculous. He wasn't intimidated by Mr. and Mrs. Rosenberg, so it bothered him that he had to sneak around. But Joie insisted that it was what he wanted so Cooper went along with it…for now, anyway.

When he got up to the window, he easily opened it and slipped inside the room. "Jo?" he said quietly, frowning because the light was off. Joie had called him and asked him to come over, so he had to be home. "Joie where are you?"

The bedroom door opened before Cooper could dive for cover, but thankfully it was just Joie. "Did I scare you?" Joie asked playfully.

"No," Cooper denied. He blinked as Joie turned on the light and then frowned when he saw the state of Joie's face. "Son of a bitch," he growled.

Joie winced at Cooper's words. "It's not that bad," he said defensively.

Cooper scowled. "Not that bad?" Joie had a black eye and a busted lip. "I'll kill him," he declared, trying to head out the bedroom door to see if Mr. Rosenberg was home.

"No!" Joie squeaked, trying to block Cooper's path. The ONLY reason he was effective in his attempt was because Cooper didn't want to bulldoze right through him. "He's passed out, alright? If he wakes up now-"

"He won't stay awake for long," Cooper promised. He wanted so badly to move Joie out of the way so he could go downstairs, but previous bruises had told him that Mr. Rosenberg loved to kick people when they were down. And given the fact that Joie was wearing normal boy clothes and wasn't wearing his wig for the first time in a long time, the beating had to have been much worse than the bruises on his face let on.

"Cooper please, I just…can we please drop it?" Joie was begging with the last bit of energy he had left and once again Cooper found himself melting.

"This is not fair," Cooper complained as he helped Joie sit down on the bed before joining him. "You can't keep asking me to just sit back and let him hurt you. He's going to go too far one of these days."

"He will not," Joie insisted, resting his head on Cooper's chest. "Look, he was raised to believe that if your kid-"

"Don't make excuses for him damn it! I've heard what you said before, and you know what? I don't care. Fucking hell, my dad came from a home that was like fifty times more abusive than your dad did and he turned out fine."

Joie raised his eyebrows. "Your daddy is a serial killer."

"Yeah but he's not beating me or Connor, now is he?"

"Can we please just drop the subject? Don't make me beg now."

Cooper sighed and did his best to keep his mouth shut and hold Joie as carefully as he could. He wanted to kill Joie's dad so bad that it hurt, but the last thing he wanted was for Joie to be mad at him again. Six months ago he had just about beaten Mr. Rosenberg to death and Joie hadn't talked to him for three days. Those had been the three longest days of his life and he didn't want to put their friendship at risk again.

"Cooper?" Joie said suddenly, breaking the silence.

"Yeah?"

There was a very long silence. "Uh…never mind." Joie turned slightly red and sat up, wincing and grabbing on to his ribs.

"Here, let me see how bad it is," Cooper said, trying to lift up Joie's shirt to see the damage.

"No," Joie refused, trying to slap Cooper's hands away.

"Damn it Joie-"

Joie suddenly kissed Cooper, taking the larger teen by surprise. The kiss seemed to be intended to only last for a second, but Cooper quickly surprised Joie by deepening it and refusing to let it in. When they did break apart a couple of minutes later, they were both panting for air and staring at each other with wide eyes.

"What did we just do?" Joie asked incredulously.

"Uh…I think it's really obvious what we did," Cooper replied, running his tongue over his lips. He could taste Joie's strawberry lip gloss still and it compelled him to go for another kiss.

"DAMN IT! WHO DRANK MY LAST BEER!"

Cooper snarled and Joie jumped at the sound of Mr. Rosenberg's voice. "Come on," Joie said anxiously, grabbing Cooper by the hand and pulling him to the window. "Let's get out of here."

Cooper reluctantly followed Joie, silently cursing inside of his head. One of these days, he was going to get that fucker. He was going to get that fucker real good and send him down to hell where he belonged. _And hopefully Joie will forgive me for it._


	6. Chapter 6

"Alright kids, let's quit just sitting here," James said, turning off the TV and clapping his hands together. "Today shouldn't be a lazy day. Today needs to be busy and fun and all that good stuff." He frowned when neither Cooper or Connor made any effort to get up. "What's wrong with you guys?"

"We don't feel like doing anything," Cooper replied as Connor nodded in agreement. They both knew the only reason James felt like doing anything was because Mark had left once again and he obviously didn't want to think about what that douchebag was going to do while he was out on the road.

"But…but I want to go kill someone," James said with a pout.

"I do too," Connor said, grabbing the remote and turning the TV back on. "But we can do it after Tom and Jerry is over. Now MOVE!"

Cooper chuckled as James quickly moved out of the way and sat down next to him. "You don't fuck with Tom and Jerry time," he said wisely. "Believe me, you were lucky you shut that thing off during a commercial. He would have killed you if you had interrupted the actual show."

"Yeah yeah I know," James said with a sigh. He looked at his watch before rubbing the back of his neck. "Where's Joie?"

"He'll be here in awhile," Cooper answered. "He um…had something to do."

James frowned and tilted his head to the side. "Did you two have a fight or something?"

"No….um…." Cooper wasn't sure if he should admit this or not but he was going to. It wasn't like he had anyone else to talk to about this. "He kissed me."

"Well it's about time," James said, looking positively giddy about that bit of news. "Did you kiss back?"

"Yeah."

Connor giggled loudly. "Did you two make a baby?"

Cooper frowned at his little brother. "Two men can't make a baby dumbass. Only a girl and a boy can make a baby together."

Connor rolled his eyes in exasperation. "But Joie's pretty like a girl!"

James roared with laughter as Cooper failed to come up with any kind of response to that statement. Grinning triumphantly, Connor got off the couch so he could go sit right in front of the TV. Neither James nor Cooper made any attempt to tell him to scoot back away from it. Connor always sat where he wanted and that was all there was to it.

"So did you like the kiss?" James asked, putting the conversation back on track.

Cooper tried not to answer that question, but the fact that his whole face was rapidly turning red told the entire story in a nutshell. "So what are you guys going to do now?" James asked, a big old grin now being permanently etched on his face.

"I don't know," Cooper said with a sigh. "What should we do? I mean…there's a lot we could do, but it could fuck up our friendship."

"True," James admitted with a nod. "But I think you two would be alright. I mean, you two are perfect for each other! Seriously, I've thought so since the moment you met." He reached up and ruffled Cooper's hair. "You dyed it again."

"Yeah," Cooper said, reaching up and touching his now really dark brown hair. "How the hell did I get born with red hair? Seriously, how the fuck does that happen? You and Mom both had brown hair. I should have had that too." His natural hair color was such a bright red that he had started dyeing it in the fifth grade so people would stop comparing him to Ronald McDonald. "So really, what should I do about Joie?"

"Take him out on a date," James suggested. "Once your party gets over tomorrow ask him if he wants to go out to eat dinner with you."

"That just seems…I don't know…"

"You don't want to do it my way? Fine. Do it your way. But just do it, okay?"

"Okay," Cooper said, trying to ignore how nervous he suddenly felt. He tried to focus on the television but it failed to keep his attention. All he could think about now was Joie. What was Joie going to say when he asked him out? He didn't think he would say no…but what if he did? Cooper didn't know what he would do then. He suppose that he would have to accept that answer, but he knew he would feel like total jackass if he put himself out there only to get rejected.

"Daddy?" Connor suddenly said as Tom and Jerry went into their final commercial. "Where is Cooper's birthday party tomorrow?"

"Yeah really," Cooper said, grateful for the sudden change of subject. Despite his insistence that his birthday really wasn't that big of a deal, James always saw fit to throw him a party. And like things tended to do in with this family, it almost always went wrong. Last year one of Owen's ribs had gone wrong and Davey Boy ended up getting a barbeque fork stuck in his ass (of course, knowing Owen, that rib actually did go right) and the year before that, Mark had shown up drunk and crashed the party. "I mean, I really don't want-"

"But Cooper, I've got it all planned out!" James whined, actually pouting now.

Cooper rolled his eyes. He could argue with James about this, but it really wasn't worth it. This party was going to happen whether he liked it or not. "Fine," he said in defeat. "But if something goes wrong, you're cleaning up the mess. You understand me?"

"Aye aye captain!" James saluted Cooper before getting up and wandering off.

Cooper rolled his eyes before turning his attention back to the television. _It's kind of sad that I'm the only sane one here. Oh well, at least I do a good job at it._

…

"Oh…my…God…" Cooper muttered under his breath. It was officially his birthday and his birthday party was being held at Adventuredome, an indoor amusement park connected to the Circus Circus hotel, right on the good old Las Vegas Strip. James, having the connections he did, got the place shut down for everyone but them and the party guests. "Dad are you serious?" He was taking back his reluctance about this party. Who the fuck didn't want an amusement park to themselves for a day? No lines, no annoying people to annoy him…it was absolutely perfect.

James grinned triumphantly as he led Cooper, Connor and Joie towards the party room. ""I'm completely serious." He looked ready to ditch the present giving and the cake and ice cream so he could get straight to the rides. "I know this might not be the ideal place for a sweet sixteen party-"

"Poppa James, only girls call their sixteenth birthday party their sweet sixteen," Joie pointed out as Cooper nodded in agreement.

Connor, who was licking a giant lollypop that James had bought at the gas station for him, gave Joie an interesting look. "When's your sweet sixteen party then?"

Joie blinked several times while James laughed and Cooper slapped Connor upside the head. "Uh…I'm not going to even got there," he decided.

"Good choice," Cooper said with a nod. "Believe me, there's not hope when it comes to Connor."

"Hey!" Connor whined, pouting his lips and stomping his foot. "Butthole! I didn't do nothing!" He went to kick Cooper, but then Cooper raised his foot and he screamed and hit behind James's leg. "Daddy! Daddy help me! He's gonna get me!"

James sighed and just gave Cooper a look. Cooper sighed and lowered his fist, getting a sympathetic pat on the back from Joie afterwards. Like he had said, there was no hope with Connor.

When they got to the party room, they found that the guests had gotten rambunctious without them. Davey was chasing Owen around the room while Jim egged them on from his chair. Bret was talking to Steve and Glenn all while seemingly thinking about whether he should trip Owen and Davey while they went by. Tammy (or Sunny as Connor called her since he was convinced her ring name was her actual one) and Mick were playing with Bret and Owen's kids, who seemed hell bent on making as much noise as possible.

"There you sum bitches are," Steve said as Cooper and Joie sat down with them. James was joining in on the Owen/Davey chase and Connor was going to play with the other kids. "You're late for your own party."

"Hey, don't blame me," Cooper said with an innocent shrug. "I wasn't the one driving." He looked over at the cooler that was sitting behind Glenn. "Mind passing me a beer Crispy?"

Glenn glared at him. "Yes."

Cooper rolled his eyes before giving Bret a hopeful look. That hope was dashed though when Bret shook his head. "Don't even think about it kiddo. I'll get you and Joie a Coke."

Cooper huffed loudly before turning to Joie and pouting. "These people don't understand the concept of the birthday boy getting what he wants."

"Poor baby," Joie said, grabbing Cooper's hand and giving it a good squeeze. Cooper felt a spark shoot through him as soon as they made contact, and judging from the look on Joie's face, he felt it to. In that moment, he really wanted to kiss him again, and he almost actually did it, but a loud crash scared the living daylights out of both of them and broke the mood completely.

"Whoo!" Owen shouted triumphantly, jumping up and down like a little kid. James had taken Davey down and they were rolling around the floor, wrestling like a couple of teenagers. "I win! Oh yeah! Who's the best? I'm the best!"

"Damn jackass didn't do anything," Steve pointed out.

Bret smirked. "I know, but you don't argue with Owen logic. You just smile and nod and go along with it."

Cooper had to chuckle at that. That was definitely the truth.

Once James and Davey were separated from each other, it was decided to go straight into cake and ice cream. James tried to burn Glenn with the candles before they got blown out and the singing of "Happy Birthday" was interrupted by Tammy slapping Steve continually poking her for his own entertainment. Then, while they were all eating, Connor decided to eat his cake like a dog, which made Oje and Athena do the same thing. And instead of scolding his kids for doing so, Owen decided to join in on the fun-after shoving another piece of cake in Bret's face of course.

"I think it's time to move on to presents," Bret muttered as he attempted to clean himself off.

"You missed a spot," Joie said helpfully, grabbing a napkin and attempting to help.

"He's missed a lot of spots so far," Jim pointed out, stroking his beard and openly laughing at Bret.

"You look like a bloody idiot," Davey proclaimed happily.

"Hey, be nice," Tammy scolded, shrieking when Connor started trying to bite her ankles.

"Grrr," he growled. "I'm a mad puppy. Woof woof!"

"Knock it off you dope," Cooper ordered, kicking Connor as he began opening his presents. The popular theme of presents with him was always games, movies and cds, and this year was no exception. He was pretty satisfied with what he got, but then James threw the gigantic cherry on top by giving him a set of keys to a car that was going to be at the house by the time they got back home. "Fucking sweet," he said happily. He put his finger through the key chain the key was connected to and started twirling it around. "Thanks Dad."

"No problem," James said happily. "I know you don't got your license or anything but that's just a minor detail." He chuckled at the look everyone else gave him. "Quit staring at me like y'all want to fuck me. Let's go ride some rides bitches!" He suddenly frowned and pointed at Cooper and Joie. "But not you two. Not yet. You two have something to talk about."

Cooper quickly hid his face in his hair as everyone else left the party room. He really wished James had not blurted that out. Now he felt an extreme amount of pressure on his shoulders.

"Are you blushing Cooper?" Joie asked, doing his best to look past Cooper's hair so he could get a good look at his face.

"No," Cooper lied. He took a deep breath and sighed, wishing that his mouth wasn't so dry. "I just…I want to ask….wannagoouttodinnerlater?"

Joie blinked and tried to translate that. "Can you say that again?" he asked. "I didn't get that."

Cooper sighed and tried again. "Do you uh…want to go out to dinner later? You know…me and you…alone…and all that?"

"You're asking me out on a date?"

"Uh….yeah, pretty much."

Joie grinned and kissed him without another moment's hesitation. "I'd love to," he answered.

"Oh thank God," Cooper said in relief. He stood up and then grabbed Joie by the hand. "Now come on. Last one to the roller coaster has to listen to Dad sing for an hour without ear plugs."

Joie made a horrified face. "You're a monster!" he declared jokingly.

"Yeah, but I'm an awesome monster so let's go."


	7. Chapter 7

"So where exactly are we going?" Joie asked as Cooper pulled his new convertible out of the driveway and began driving down the street. They had changed after they had gotten back from the amusement park and now they were going out to get something to eat.

"I have no idea," Cooper admitted. He was trying to keep his eyes on the road, but it was hard for him when all he wanted to do was look at Joie. _Come on Lawson, focus. _He tightened his grip on the steering wheel and focused on driving. It wasn't like he actually had his license or anything; his only lessons for being out on the road had come from James, and those resulted in him learning what NOT to do out on the road. If he got pulled over now, he was fucked. "I was hoping you would decide for me."

"Oh yeah, leave all the work to me," Joie said with a shake of his head. He began twirling his hair around with his finger and chewing on his lower lip as he thought about it. It took him so long to answer that Cooper really thought he had spaced the question off completely. "How about we drive through Burger King and then eat here in the car?" he finally suggested.

Cooper raised his eyebrows at that answer. "Burger King in a car? You're way too easy to please."

"Actually I just don't feel like getting kicked out of another restaurant because you cant' stop throwing stuff at people."

"I do not do that!" Cooper said defensively. "That's Connor!"

"So Connor threw four containers at the cashier at McDonalds, dumped a glass of Coke on that old guy's head at Arbys and-"

"You just need to keep quiet about all that," Cooper said as he slumped down in his seat. This was one of the only problems of Joie knowing him so well-valid points like that tended to get pointed out during conversations. "That is just stuff we need to never bring up again."

Joie smirked. "Just like that time we found that sex tape-"

"Yes! Exactly! Now shush!" Cooper tried to shake off the thought of the tape that showed James and Mark doing the nasty as he turned into the Burger King drive thru. "What do you want to eat?"

"I want a Kids Meal," Joie answered.

Cooper raised his eyebrows. "Seriously?"

Joie nodded. "Of course."

Cooper rolled his eyes and rolled down his window. Connor's influence had struck again.

After getting Joie his Kids Meal and himself enough food to feed a small army, Cooper drove them to the old drive in theater that had closed down a few years back. "How's here?" he asked, fully intending on driving somewhere else if Joie didn't like it.

"Here's good," Joie assured him. He had already gotten out his toy and was now playing with it."

"Good." Cooper put the car in park and started digging into his food.

"Your onion rings smell good," Joie commented, sending an envious look as he ate a French fry.

Cooper rolled his eyes before handing over a few of the rings. "Why didn't you order your own?"

"Because it's more fun to mooch off of you."

Cooper rolled his eyes again before taking one of the onion rings and sticking his tongue through it. Once it was perfectly balanced, he began trying to twirl it around, really just hitting his lips a whole bunch and straining his tongue a bit.

"What the hell are you doing?" Joie asked incredulously.

Cooper just shrugged and kept trying until he realized that it wasn't going to work. _Damn_, he thought as he put the onion ring in his mouth and began chewing. _Connor got it to do it, why can't I?_

"You're weird," Joie announced as he got into his chicken nuggets.

"Tell me something I don't know," Cooper replied, unwrapping one of his hamburgers and putting it up to his mouth.

"I kind of want to kiss you right now."

Cooper promptly missed the hamburger and bit his own hand. "What?" he said in surprise, completely ignoring the throbbing in his hand.

Joie didn't repeat himself. Instead he leaned over and kissed Cooper gently. "You taste like onion rings right now."

"Well what do you expect?" Cooper asked before initiating a kiss of his own, this one lasting a bit longer than the first one. His mind was racing at a million miles an hour and his heart was beating ten times faster than that. This was blowing his mind because he had never really felt this way before. Sure he had kissed a few guys before; hell, he had mindlessly fucked most of them. But he actually gave more than a damn about Joie. He wanted so much fucking more this time…it was kind of freaking him out.

Joie panted for breath as they broke apart again. "So um…what does this mean?" he asked quietly. "Are we like, together now?"

Cooper shrugged. "Maybe. I don't know. Everyone else is fucking convinced that we're already together. Maybe it's time for us to get with the program."

"Maybe." They left that serious little conversation on that note and finished eating before getting out of the car and walking around. "Do you have any idea why this place closed down?" Joie asked.

Cooper shook his head. "I have no idea. All I know is that Dad killed a group of prostitutes here once."

Joie shook his head. "Poppa James has killed more whores than Jack the Ripper."

Cooper grinned at that. "I know." Prostitutes (along with the homeless) were the main targets for his family for the simple fact that nobody was really going to notice whether they went missing or not. It wasn't like it was anything personal. It was simply business.

"You know, I wish this place was still open," Joie said wistfully, staring up at the blank movie screen and resting his head on Cooper's shoulder. "It would be nice if we could come here and watch a movie."

"Yeah," Cooper agreed. He put his arm around Joie's shoulders and stopped walking. "That would be nice." He knew Joie didn't like going to regular movie theaters a whole bunch because he got hassled at one pretty badly back before they even knew each other. _That shit won't happen again_, Cooper vowed to himself. _Not when I'm around. I'll fucking kill anyone who even looks at him funny_.

"Oh shit," Joie muttered, startling Cooper just a bit.

"What is it?" Cooper asked.

Joie pointed to a figure that was standing on a street corner up ahead. "You see that guy up there?"

Cooper squinted his eyes and looked. "Yeah…I can't really see his face though." He looked back at Joie. "Who is he?"

"Javier. My cousin Ruth's husband. He's a drug dealer."

"Oh." Cooper didn't see how this concerned them.

Joie shook his head and started trying to pull Cooper back towards the car. "Come on. Let's go see if we can sneak into a club or something."

Cooper frowned slightly. "What's wrong? Are you scared of that asshole or something?"

Joie shook his head. "No. I just…he's an idiot and I don't feel dealing with him right now."

Cooper had a feeling that there was possibly more to the story than that but he didn't want to ruin things by pushing Joie too much at the moment. "Okay," he agreed. "Let's get the hell out of here then."


	8. Chapter 8

"Come ON Coopy!" Connor yelled as he grabbed Cooper's hand and pulled him along. He had barged into his bedroom and had started whining about wanting to go get ice cream, which was not what Cooper had wanted to wake up to. "We have to GO!"

"I don't want to go," Cooper muttered as he tried to get Connor's hand off of him. "I want to stay in bed."

"But I want ice cream!" Connor whined. "And Daddy's asleep and you've spent all your time when you promised me LAST WEEK to get me ice cream when you never did! And I want my ice cream!"

Cooper sighed, knowing full well that this was not going to stop until he caved into Connor's demands. "Fine," he agreed. He threw the covers off of his body and sat up. "Let's go get Joie and then we can all get ice cream together."

Connor made a face. "You two aren't gonna kiss the whole time again are you?"

"No-"

"Good. Because I'm sick to DEATH of you two kissing all the time." Connor folded his arms over his chest and shook his head, actually trying to look like a disapproving parent. "You two need to keep it in your pants."

Cooper just stared at Connor, not sure whether to laugh or tell Connor to just shut up. Finally he just settled on ignoring that comment and putting some clothes on. It wasn't like he could go out and get ice cream in just his boxers.

"You and Joie are always kissing now," Connor said, taking Cooper's silence as a sign that he should just ramble on. "And touching each other. Daddy wants to know if you two have had sex yet."

Cooper, who had been trying to get his jeans on when that statement had been uttered, promptly fell over on his ass. "He wants to know WHAT?" he asked with wide eyes.

"He told me to ask you if you and Joie-"

"No! Not yet. And it's not going to be any of his business when we do do that. You hear me?"

Connor broke out into a huge grin and began to laugh hysterically. "You said do do!" He got on the bed and began jumping up and down. "You said it! You said it you said it you-"

"Get OFF my bed," Cooper ordered as he finished putting on his jeans and slipping on a plain black tank top. "You hear me? I'll put my foot up your ass if you don't settle down."

"Mean!" Connor yelled. He jumped down from the bed to the floor. "You're a big fat meanie head!"

"Uh huh." Cooper slipped his boots on and then grabbed his keys from the top of his dresser. "Now shut your mouth and come on. I'm not going to give you the ice cream if you don't quit being annoying."

Connor grinned and followed Cooper downstairs, bouncing the entire way and singing song that was completely and totally incomprehensible to anyone who wasn't Connor. Cooper was about to tell Connor to shut the hell up, but he stopped when the front door opened and Joie let himself in. In an instant Cooper completely forgot that his own brother even existed. He just grinned as Joie came up to him and gave him a kiss on the lips. "I was just coming for you," he said happily.

"Oh really?" Joie gave him another kiss. "What were you planning on doing when you found me?"

"I-"

"I WANT MY ICE CREAM!" Connor yelled at the top of his lungs. He glared at Cooper and Joie, not giving a shit that he was interrupting their little moment. "Don't you make him forget my ice cream again Joie!"

Joie chuckled and ruffled Connor's hair affectionately. "Don't worry, I won't. In fact, we're going to go right now and get that ice cream, aren't we Cooper?"

Cooper nodded. The sooner they got that over with, the sooner they could ditch Connor.

"Thank God!" James yelled from upstairs. "Do you have any idea how hard it is to have phone sex with you people talking so loudly?"

That question horrified Cooper so much that he immediately repressed it and ushered Joie and Connor right out the front door. He drove them all to Dairy Queen and except for Connor throwing a fit about not enough sprinkles on his ice cream, they had a nice time. On the way back Cooper had no intentions of stopping anywhere until he could unload Connor, but once again, Connor had other plans.

"Look over there Joie," he ordered, bouncing around in his seat and pointing to something as Cooper stopped at a stop sign. "That's where we used to live with Mommy. Do you see it? Do you see it?"

Joie nodded. "I do see it."

"I want to go in there."

Cooper looked back at Connor in shock. The little bastard hadn't even set foot in that house since he was four years old. Why would he want to go in there now? "What?" he said in disbelief. "You want to do what?"

"I want to go in there," Connor repeated. "Please Coopy? Please? Just for a little bit. Please please please please-"

"No," Cooper said as he pressed on the gas. He had no intention of ever going in there again. Usually it was painful enough just driving by the place. That house just screamed out memories of his mother. James hadn't sold it after she died because …well Cooper didn't know why. But he did know that going in there was just too much. Even after all these years it was way too much.

"Please?"

"No."

Connor scowled. As Cooper stopped again so the guy in front of him could turn left, Connor unbuckled his seatbelt and jumped out of the car so he could run for the house. "Connor!" Cooper yelled angrily.

"Oh dear," Joie said as Connor got in through the window. "Cooper-"

Cooper just sighed and reluctantly pulled into the driveway. He was going to throttle Connor when he got his hands on him.

"_Daddy Daddy! Mommy Mommy! Watch this!" Cooper yelled happily. He bounced up and down and waved his arms around until he got James and Annabelle's attention. Once all eyes were on him he took off running and jumped into his little kiddie pool, making the biggest splash that he could._

"_Wow!" Annabelle exclaimed, applauding his efforts. "That was awesome!" She looked at James for support. "Wasn't that awesome?"_

_James glared playfully at Cooper. "You got my shoes wet," he said, which made Cooper laugh hysterically. He was only three years old so he had no idea that his dad was completely lying to him about that._

"Cooper?" Joie said hesitantly, taking Cooper out of his trip down memory lane. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Cooper lied. He shut off the car and got out, taking Joie's hand and going towards the house once he was out as well.

Joie looked far from convinced. "Are you sure? I can just go in and get him if you want to stay out here."

Cooper almost took him up on that offer but at the last minute he climbed in through the window and started looking for Connor. This was just a house. An empty house that was completely dark except for the light coming in through the windows. An empty house that couldn't hurt him…

"_Mommy are you okay?" Cooper asked as Annabelle leaned up against the wall. He was scared because she didn't look very good. She was way too skinny and her wig was starting to come off, exposing the fact that the chemotherapy had taken away all of her real hair. Cooper knew that his mother was much sicker than she or his dad ever admitted to him or Connor. They had told them both on numerous occasions that everything was going to be alright. Mommy was going to get all better and not get the bad cancer again. But there were moments that Cooper doubted his parents. He didn't want to; he wanted to believe everything would be okay. But-_

Cooper shook his head and went upstairs, which was where he could hear Connor running around. "Come on," he said to Joie. He was probably crushing poor Joie's hand but he needed to have some kind of support. This was going to be even harder than he thought it was going to be.

"Coopy Coopy!" Connor yelled, horrifying Cooper when he realized that the little brat had actually gone into their parents' old room. "I found Mommy's old books! Read them to me!" He couldn't really read very well himself so he always relied on everyone else for story time.

"You know, I'll just get him," Joie said when Cooper froze in front of the bedroom door. "Come on, this is driving you crazy. You can't do this to yourself."

Cooper was going to do this to himself though. He didn't know why but he felt like such a glutton for pain at the moment. He entered the room and saw that Connor had gotten into their mother's diaries, which had been one of the many things left behind because they were too painful for James to have them around. "What are you doing you idiot?" he asked, his voice coming out angrier than he meant it to. "Those aren't storybooks. Those are Mom's diaries. Put those back!"

"I miss Momma though," Connor said with a pout. He grabbed several of the diaries and hugged them tight. "I miss her lots! You and Daddy should bring her stuff home. Why is it still here?"

"Connor-"

"I want Momma!" Connor wailed, beating his fists against the bed and throwing a full fledged tantrum. Joie immediately let go of Cooper's hand and began fussing over Connor

"Sssshhhh. Baby ssshhhh…"

Cooper ran his hand through his hair, his eyes glancing at one of the diaries that had fallen down to the floor. For a moment he just stared at it, trying to tear himself away. Then he finally picked it up and tucked it away into his pocket for safe keeping while he tried to help calm Connor down. It couldn't hurt to take just one little diary. It was just a little piece of his mother that he and Connor could keep secret from James if he still found it too painful to have reminders of her around. What harm could it possibly do?


	9. Chapter 9

_January 1st__, 1982_

_It's the start of a brand new year but I don't really feel like I'm getting a fresh start at all. In fact, I feel just as trapped as ever. Maybe I'm just being pessimistic but I can't help it. I'm entering my fourth month of pregnancy and I'm terrified out of my mind. With each passing day I'm sure that Mom is going to figure out my condition and put an end to it, just like she did the first time around. I'm hoping and praying that that won't happen. I don't think I can handle it if she did. James still doesn't even know about the first baby she's killed and I still don't have any intention on telling him. Mom's damaged him enough and I don't want to add anything more to it. _

_Speaking of Mom, her drinking is getting to the point where I'm convinced that I'm going to wake up one day and find her passed out in a pile of her own vomit (assuming that James doesn't kill her before that can happen). And on that day (murder or vomit-whichever comes first) I will dance on her dead carcass and be the happiest girl in the world._

_Just sayin._

_I am fucking annoyed though that Mark had James out until six in the morning. Then again, I'm beyond annoyed with that jackass. I don't know how much longer that I can put up with him. I'm trying because I know how much James loves him but it's getting to be nearly impossible. Something is going to have to give and it's going to have to give soon._

_I would tell James this right now but he's cuddled up to me, sleeping away like a giant puppy. I really love watching him sleep. When he's sleeping, all of his pain and anger seems to disappear, which is something that never happens when he's awake. I wish there was something I could do to make him better but I'm not sure if that's even possible at this point. _

_But still, I am kind of hopeful. He's so excited to be a father. One would think a baby would be the last thing he would ever want given the way we were raised but he's over the moon about the whole thing. Not that that bothers me. I'm ecstatic that he feels that way. But my worry still is Mom. She's going to come out of her drunken haze one day and she will see that I'm pregnant. And when that day comes, the shit will hit the fan. _

"Hey, how do I look?"

Cooper looked up from his mother's diary and saw that Joie had finished changing into his new outfit. He was now wearing a flimsy excuse for a tank top that exposed half of his stomach, a pair of dark blue jeans that looked like they had been painted on and a pair of black high heeled boots. "Oh…my…God…" Cooper was absolutely speechless.

Joie grinned and bounced around happily. "You like?"

Cooper nodded. His jeans had tightened considerably within the last few seconds. "Come here," he ordered. "Now."

"Oooh, so bossy." Joie walked over to the bed and sat on Cooper's lap.

"You love it," Cooper said. He quickly moved so that he had Joie flat on his back. "And I love you."

Joie grinned. "I love you too." He grabbed the back of Cooper's head and pulled him down for a kiss. Cooper happily responded, his large hands eagerly exploring Joie's small body. "Don't rip the shirt," Joie managed to say between kisses. "I like it."

Cooper shook his head and gently removed the flimsy top. "I do too, but it looks much better over there on the floor."

"Oh yeah?" Joie quickly helped get Cooper's shirt off and then tossed it away. "Well that looks better over there."

"I agree." The kissing resumed, only it was much more deeper and needier this time. Cooper let his lips lead him down to Joie's neck and chest, his hands unbuttoning Joie's jeans and reaching down to grab his member and start stroking it.

"Oh God," Joie groaned, thrusting his hips up into Cooper's hand. "Cooper-"

The door swung open, scaring the crap out of both of them. "Cooper, Mark is being mean to Daddy," Connor tattled. "I-" His eyes about popped out of his head when he actually saw what he had walked in on. "Uh…Coopy? Why is there a banana trying to poke itself out of your pants?"

Joie, who had just about died of embarrassment, let out a high pitched giggle at that. Cooper however, was not amused. "OUT!" he yelled angrily.

"Daddy! Cooper's got his hands down Joie's pants!" Connor yelled, shrieking and running away when Cooper took that hand out of Joie's pants and threw a shoe at him.

"Whoa whoa whoa!" James yelled as he came thundering up the stairs. "Since when does Joie wear pants?"

"Oh my God," Joie groaned. "Cooper-"

"I've got it." Cooper quickly got up and closed and locked the door before James could come in. And just to be safe, he barricaded it so nobody could get in even if they picked the lock. "Well that was a mood killer," he grumbled as he came back to bed.

Joie nodded in agreement. "It is. We should have made out in the car again."

"Or move into a hotel." Cooper ran his hand through his hair and shook his head. "That would be better."

"Yeah…" Joie looked at the barricaded door before shaking his head. "Fuck it, I'm not letting them ruin our mood." He practically ripped Cooper's belt off and started pulling down his jeans. "Hips up," he ordered. Now."

Cooper blinked in surprise. "I thought I was-"

"Don't argue with me. Arguing will lead to your spanking."

Cooper had to laugh at that. "Spanking huh?" He arched his hips up so he could help get his jeans and boxers off. "I'll have to take you up on that when nobody else is home."

Joie's face turned a bright shade of pink, but he didn't take the statement back. Instead he flicked his tongue across the head of Cooper's cock, making him groan loudly. "Ssshh!" Joie scolded. "We'll be heard."

Cooper shook his head. "Fuck them. I'll kill them all if they try to come in here."

"You will not. Now here-" Joie handed him a pillow. "Stifle yourself and let me take care of you."

"Now look who's being bossy," Cooper muttered good naturedly. He put the pillow over his face so he could bite down on it as Joie's warm, tight mouth engulfed his manhood. "Jesus fuck!" he shouted into the pillow, digging his nails into the soft material as he tried to resist the urge to thrust upwards. Joie's nails were digging into his thighs, trying to keep him still as he sucked him. Cooper knew that Joie had never actually done this before so he was trying to contain himself.

"Babe slow down," he mumbled when Joie tried to take him in too far and ended up gagging himself. "You don't-"

"I'm fine," Joie insisted. He took a moment to rub his throat before resuming his sucking. Cooper shook his head and bit back the moans that were dying to escape him. The fact that anyone could come knocking at the door again added to the excitement and it wasn't long before Cooper was reaching his peak. "Gonna cum," he managed to gasp out, too far gone to really be that coherent. "Joie-"

Joie merely started sucking harder, swallowing as much of Cooper's release as he could. "…I did that okay, right?" he asked nervously.

Cooper nodded. "You did it perfectly." He sat up and took a deep breath to collect himself before lunging at Joie playfully and pinning him down on the bed. "Now it's my turn." He eagerly began kissing his way down Joie's body, easily taking all of Joie's length into his mouth when he got to it. Joie immediately thrusted his hips up but that didn't bother Cooper too much. He just relaxed his throat and bobbed his head up and down as fast as he could, using every trick he had ever had done on him to bring Joie to climax. Joie tried to say something right before he came, but it was all gibberish. Cooper took that as a compliment and he easily swallowed Joie's load before taking his mouth away and smirking smugly. "Ta da."

Joie panted for breath and stared at him with a dazed look on his face. "Wow. That was…wow."

Cooper chuckled and laid down so he could snuggle up to his boyfriend. "We go sleepies now, okay?"

"Okay."

…

_January 25__th__, 1982_

_Mom knows. God help us all Mom knows. She walked in while I was changing and saw the baby bump. If James hadn't been in there…I don't even want to think about what could have happened. As it is, she got into a huge screaming match with James and his nose is now broken and I've barricaded myself into the attic because she already threatened to kick our "retarded incest spawn" out of me. If she only knew…no, she'll never know. Not only would it not make a difference to her, but this is mine and James's baby. Ours. All ours._

"God damn it Mark! You _promised_ me that you would leave Jodi. You fucking _promised_!"

Cooper groaned and quickly closed the diary and hid it. He still hadn't told James that he had gotten it from the old house, and he didn't think that having James see it while he was arguing with Mark would end well.

"I ain't going over this with you again Lawson," Mark snapped as he and James entered the kitchen. It wasn't a surprise to Cooper to see Mark head straight for the cupboard that held his Jack Daniels. The man acted like he couldn't function without having a damn drink every hour that he was awake and not wrestling. "I can't leave her so just forget about it."

"But you _promised_," James protested. "You hate Jodi and you promised to finally leave her. Jesus Christ Mark, what the hell is stopping you? You _hate_ her. When you're home with her, you're always calling me and telling me how miserable she makes you."

"That ain't the point Lawson."

"Then what is the point?"

"The point is that if he leaves her and chooses you like you want him to, that would make you happy," Cooper said, deciding to interject himself into this argument. "And he's not capable of doing that because he's a miserable bastard that likes to fuck with your emotions."

Mark glared at him angrily. "You stay out of this. This ain't your business."

"He's my dad so it is my business," Cooper snapped.

"Cooper-" James said uneasily.

"You know he's not just sleeping with Jodi." Cooper wasn't about to stop now. Not when his dad was getting played like a fiddle. "He's fucking around with God knows how many skanks and twinks on the road. So even if he leaves Jodi he's still going-"

"Cooper!" James hissed angrily. He didn't want to heart the truth. Cooper was just trying to help him but he didn't want to hear it. It was so fucking typical and it sickened Cooper.

"You ought to just keep your mouth shut," Mark said, just having to add his two cents. "This is between me and him."

"Oh fuck you, you miserable bastard," Cooper said defiantly. "You don't even deserve Dad, so why you don't fall off a cliff and die?"

"You first," Mark growled before taking his whiskey and leaving the room. James immediately chased after him like the good little puppy he was. Cooper shook his head in disgust before looking over at Spot, who had entered the room and was wagging his tail tiredly. "I don't get those two," he declared. "And I don't want to." He reached down and patted his dog on the head. "You want to go for a walk boy?"

Spot woofed dutifully.

"Alright then. Let's go."


	10. Chapter 10

The sound of James and Mark screaming at each other drifted up to Cooper's room, where he, Connor and Joie were hiding out. The fighting had started in earnest about an hour ago and it didn't seem like it was going to let down any time soon. Originally Cooper had wanted to get out of the house and go somewhere else completely, but it was over a hundred degrees outside and none of them wanted to leave the air conditioning the house was providing them. So instead of abandoning ship, Cooper put on 101 Dalmatians because Connor wanted to watch it and hid his mother's diary behind his wrestling magazine so he could look at in peace. Joie had probably already figured out what he was really doing but like the good boyfriend he was, he hadn't said anything so Connor wouldn't bother him about it.

"I want a lot of puppies like that," Connor said as he happily munched on some potato chips. "But I want to keep them forever and ever and not make a coat out of them like that mean bitch wants to."

"Well that's good," Joie said. "Making coats out of puppies is mean."

"Yeah," Connor agreed. "Very very mean."

Cooper chuckled and shook his head. He always got a kick out of the conversations Joie and Connor had. He didn't know why, but they always entertained the hell out of him. Turning the page of the diary, he sighed and started reading the next entry. Maybe doing this wasn't exactly appropriate, but he didn't give a rat's ass. He missed his mother more than anything in the world and he would take any part of her he could get, even if it meant that he had to read about some rather unpleasant incidents in the process.

_March 26th__, 1982_

_I can't take this anymore. I honestly can't. My life…it's all falling apart and I can't stop it. James and Mark are fighting because Mark hates me, Caroline is up my ass and everyone at school thinks I'm a gigantic slut. I'm the first pregnant girl in this fucking place that hasn't been shipped off to a home for unwed mothers, so everyone is taking that as an invitation to mock me and treat me like I'm a town whore. But of course they don't do it when James or Glenn are around. Oh no, they wait until only Mark is around. They know he won't defend me. They all know he hates me. He lets them tease and insult me until I'm reduced into a sobbing mess that has to hide in the girl's bathroom until James comes to get me. _

_Although today was a little bit different. I snapped just a bit for the first time and it felt really good. I was walking out of biology with Mark and Lindsey Harold and her little gang of bulimic cheerleaders surrounded me so they could once again use me as their verbal punching bag. Words cannot describe how much I hate all of them. They think they're so fucking perfect just because they can wave pom poms around and blow the guys on the football team. Bitches. Fucking bitches._

_Anyway, Lindsey started in on me first, just like she always did. "Oh no, I hate these cattle crossings," she said as loudly as possible. "Hey Annabelle, why don't you mooove out of the way?" Her stupid little friends laughed as loud as they could at that. They all thought she was so fucking clever for making fun of the fact that I was getting bigger and bigger with each passing day. _

_I glanced at Mark, who was acting like I didn't exist. I was trying to keep myself together and just walk away like I always did, but Lindsey didn't want to stop there. No, she had to keep running her big fucking mouth. "You know, I almost want to feel sorry for this poor baby. It's going to grow up to be such a fucking freak."_

_That was the part where I snapped. It was one thing to attack me and make me feel like absolute shit. I was used to that and it didn't bother me at all. But going after my son was something else entirely. Cooper hasn't even born yet but already everyone's ready to crucify him once he comes out of the womb just because of the family he was born into. It pisses me off and I fucking showed the bitch just how much it made me mad. I turned around and grabbed her by her bleach blonde hair, almost yanking a handful of it out as I pulled her out of the classroom doorway so I could smash her face right into the nearest set of lockers. "Shut the fuck UP!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "You stupid bitch! Shut up shut up SHUT UP!" I kept smashing her stupid little face into the lockers before throwing her down to the floor and kicking her when she was down. Everyone was staring at me but they were too shocked to do anything. They just let me kick her to my heart's content and then they watched me run away. I just ran until I got out to James's car and that's where I'm hiding now, just waiting for him to realize that he needs to come find me again. I feel terrible for always making him come get me because I'm too scared to stay strong on my own but I don't know what else to do. I can't function on my own. I'm just a fucking broken mess._

"Coopy, why aren't you watching the movie?" Connor asked.

"Because I don't feel like it," Cooper replied.

"But but…puppies! There's puppies on the screen!" Connor began bouncing up and down excitedly. "I wants a lot of puppies like this. You'll make Daddy buy them for me, won't you Coopy?"

"No," Cooper answered immediately. "We don't need a hundred and one puppies. We have Spot."

"Spot's not a puppy though. He's a big old thing. I want new puppies!"

"Connor honey, just watch the movie with me, okay?" Joie said, interrupting the fight before it got too far.

Connor huffed angrily but then smiled and snuggled up to Joie so he could continue watching the movie. Cooper got up and gave Joie a grateful kiss on the cheek before plopping down on the bed and resuming his reading.

_March 28__th__, 1982_

_I hate my mother. I hate her more than anything in this entire universe. Yesterday I was home with James and Mark and Glenn snuck over because we were going to go to some club where a local band was playing just to get away from all the bullshit coming from our home lives. But when I was trying to find an outfit that didn't make me look like a beached whale, I noticed that all my diaries where gone. I had them in the closet but they were all gone. "James? Did you move my diaries?" I asked nervously._

"_No," James replied. "You know I wouldn't touch them Belle."_

"_Who cares about your fucking stupid diaries," Mark snapped, his cold eyes glaring holes through me. "Can you just fucking move your ass?"_

"_Mark!" James hissed._

"_What? She's so fucking slow…_

_I ignored his words and ran out of the room, already knowing who had taken them. "Please don't let her have read them. Please don't let her have read them…" I prayed this under my breath but it was all in vain. I found Caroline downstairs with my diaries and it was obvious she had already read them._

"_You're a dirty liar you know," she informed me as she got up and started walking towards me. "All this time, you've been letting me think that the thing growing inside of you belonged to your dumbfuck brother when it's really belonged to Mark." She chuckled bitterly. "Cooper Benjamin Lawson…fuck, why can't you just fucking give him Calaway's last name and save me the embarrassment? It's bad enough you and your sniveling brother-"_

"_Mom! Back the fuck off of her!" James and the others had come downstairs, which just lit a fire under the bitch's ass. She had plenty of ammunition to fire with and fire she did._

"_Aw, what's the matter James?" Caroline asked mockingly. "Are you afraid I'm going to hurt Mark's baby?"_

_James flinched at the words and I looked down at my feet. I felt so fucking bad for him that I wanted to die from it. Even though we both know that Cooper had to be Mark's biologically because he was the only one I had stupid unprotected sex with and the due date matched up with the date of conception, Cooper is still going to be ours. Mark doesn't want him and I don't want him to be Mark's. James accepts Cooper as his and his he shall be._

"_That fucking kid ain't mine," Mark claimed, just like he always did. _

"_Oh it's not?" Caroline just laughed at him. "You're fucking pathetic Calaway. The only useful thing you've ever done was tell her to get a fucking abortion but you were too big of a pussy to fucking to make her fucking not have the bastard. You don't want to be a father? You should have taken care of it, just like I tried to do with these two." She glared at me and James hatefully. "How the fuck are you two going to raise this parasite? Huh? What are you two going to be able to do for it?"_

"_He's not an it," James said angrily. He was literally shaking and I knew he wanted to kill her right there on the spot so she wouldn't say anymore. But she has such a strong mental hold over him that he couldn't. He wants her to love him so bad but he doesn't realize she's not capable of loving anyone. At least I don't think he realizes. I even have a hard time wrapping my head around his feelings towards Mom._

"_He's an it to me," Caroline said coldly. "And he's an it to Mark." She smirked and got right in James's face. "Do you know how jealous Calaway is of her? Huh? Do you know the things he says to her behind your back? Do you know about the fact that she doesn't like being alone with him because she's convinced he's going to end this little fucking parasite's life before it even begins?"_

"Cooper? Cooper what's wrong? Cooper!"

Cooper handed Joie the diary before rolling off the bed and sticking his head into the little trashcan by his bedside so he could throw up in it. The Taco Bell he had eaten earlier tasted nasty coming back up, but he was in such a state of shock that he barely even noticed it. Mark was his father? No, that couldn't be right. This had to be a mistake of some sort. It had to be.

"Ew, that's gross," Connor said. He got up and watched Cooper throw up with a disgusted face. "Do I need to go get Daddy?"

Cooper gagged and cough as he finished puking, groaning and grabbing a tissue so he could wipe his mouth off. "Joie…" he said weakly.

Joie was already reading the entry that Cooper had just read and his face was getting paler and paler every second. "Holy shit," he fucking muttered. "Cooper…"

"I read that right didn't I?" Cooper asked.

"Yeah. You did."

Cooper felt like he had just gotten hit by a truck. "No," he muttered. "Fuck no." He shook his head and got up to his feet. This still had to be a mistake. A big fat mistake.

"Where are you going Coopy?" Connor asked. "What's wrong? You're being really weird."

Cooper didn't even respond to him. He just opened the window and tried to climb out of it, but he was in such a daze that he slipped about halfway down and fell into the bushes below him. He didn't even feel the effects of the fall though. He just got up and dusted himself off before taking off for their own house. He needed to find his mother's other diaries. This had to be some sort of fucking mistake. There was no way he was Mark's son. No fucking way.


	11. Chapter 11

"Coopy what's the matter?" Connor asked as he and Joie followed Cooper into their old house. "Why are you sad? I don't want you to be sad Coopy." He tugged on Joie's arm and pointed at Cooper. "Make him happy Joie."

"Connor just be quiet," Joie said gently. "Now is not-"

"But I want Coopy to be happy!"

"Connor, would you please just shut the fuck up?" Cooper growled. He wasn't really mad at Connor or anything but he could not deal with his younger brother's whining at the moment. "I've got something important to do."

Connor's face fell at Cooper's tone. "Mean!" he shrieked unhappily. "Just because you're sad doesn't mean you have to be mean!" He sniffled and stormed off, making Joie sigh and shake his head.

"Connor-"

"Go after him," Cooper ordered.

"But what about you?"

"I'll be fine. Just make sure he doesn't go off and get himself in trouble." Cooper was far from being fine but he didn't want Joie to worry about him.

Joie wasn't buying it for a moment but he let it be. "Call me if you need me, okay?" He waited until Cooper nodded before kissing him and going after Connor. Cooper let out a shaky breath and went upstairs to James and Annabelle's bedroom. There was a moment where he almost chickened out. He was so desperate to not believe what he had read earlier that he almost decided to just forget this idea and do his best to repress the information he had just received. But curiosity got the best of him and he began searching through Annabelle's other diaries, looking for the answers that he was sure he was going to regret learning afterwards.

…

James splashed ice cold water on his face for several minutes, trying his hardest to calm back down. He absolutely despised fighting with Mark. It took a huge emotional toll on him every time they got into it and what was worse was the fact that he never knew how to fix things. Every time he tried he just ended up making things worse. "Fuck," he muttered. He turned off the faucet and used the nearest towel to dry his face off. He didn't know what to do at this point. He loved Mark so fucking much but it was hard to believe Mark felt the same way about him at this point. _No_, he thought stubbornly. _He still loves me. He's just being a jackass again_.

Sighing unhappily, he left the bedroom and knocked on Cooper's door. "Boys?" They always hid out in there when he and Mark fought. "Can I come in?" No answer. He grabbed the doorknob and turned it, poking his head in as the door opened. "Boys?" He cursed under his breath when he saw that they weren't in there. "Boys?" He searched the entire house, freaking out a tad bit when he didn't find them. "Shit!" He went to the living room and slipped on his boots. He was going to go out and look for them. He wanted to make sure they were alright plus he had to get out of the house for awhile.

He almost called out to Mark to tell him that he was leaving but he stopped himself. What was the point? Him saying anything before they were completely cooled down was just going to lead to another fight and he didn't want that. He just wanted Jodi out of the way and for Mark to come home for good because that was the way things were supposed to be. He and Mark were supposed to be forever; it was as simple as that.

…

_September 9th__, 1981_

_I'm beyond disgusted with myself. I seriously can't believe that I sunk as low as I did. I had sex with Mark last week. It was…oh God, I can't believe that I did that. We all got disgustingly drunk and while Glenn and James passed out, Mark and I got into an argument. I honestly don't remember what exactly we were fighting about and I don't remember who even initiated the sex (my money is on him though-even while near blackout levels I highly doubt I would do something as actually start physical contact with him) but what I do remember is that I really didn't enjoy the sex. Mark was way too rough and what's worse is that the bastard didn't use a condom. So now I'm freaking out because I'm scared I'm going to get pregnant. I don't want a baby with Mark. That would just be too weird and awkward._

_At least James didn't freak out on us like I thought he was going to. In fact, he was under the impression that maybe us doing it would be good for us because it would release the tension that was always between us and make us get along better. That hasn't happened yet though. Nothing has changed except for the fact that I'm now ashamed of myself. Hopefully nothing else will change though. My life is complicated enough as it is._

_November 22__nd__, 1981_

_I'm pregnant. I'm fucking pregnant and it's Mark's. It has to be. The few times James and I have had sex in the past couple years, we've always used protection. Besides, I already went to the doctor and how far along I am matches the night Mark and I did it. Now I have to tell him and I know he's going to react badly. I just know it._

_November 23__rd__, 1981_

_I was right. Mark freaked out on me. I told him and James at the same time, hoping that would defuse the situation a little bit. It didn't though. In fact, it just made things worse._

"_It's not mine," Mark said immediately after I made the announcement. He glared at James angrily. "Don't let her pin this shit on me. I didn't do it."_

_James frowned at his reaction before turning to me. "It could be mine," he said hopefully. "I mean, a condom could have broke-"_

"_But none have," I pointed out. "We would have realized that."_

_His face fell and he looked back at Mark. "It probably is yours-"_

"_So? I don't want it."_

"_Why not?"_

"_Because I'm sixteen fucking years old! I ain't fucking ready for that shit!"_

"_And you think I am?" I asked, getting angry with him. The way he was acting was complete and total bullshit._

"_Hey, if you don't want it, get rid of it. It's as simple as that."_

Cooper closed the diary, unable to read anymore. "Fuck," he muttered. He laid back on the bed and stared up at the ceiling, completely at a loss about what he should do. Mark was his father? Mark, the one man he had hated his entire life. No, this wasn't right. This wasn't fair. James was supposed to be his father. He loved James. James, as insane and homicidal as he was, was a good father. Mark was too busy drinking and wrestling to give a shit about anyone but himself.

"Cooper?"

Cooper sat up and looked at Joie and Connor. "It's true," he said weakly.

Joie's face fell. "Oh Cooper…"

Connor frowned in confusion. "What's true Coopy? What's going on?"

Cooper couldn't answer him. He just got up and left the room, going right out of the house and not stopping when Joie called his name. So many emotions were flooding through him. He was angry, both at Mark and himself. He was in shock because his whole life was a fucking lie but most of all, he was hurt. It actually hurt his feelings to find out that Calaway had advocated for him to be aborted. It hurt his feelings that his mother obviously hadn't wanted a baby with the bastard. There was no denying that because he had seen the words for himself. What if she had secretly resented him even after she and James decided to raise him themselves? It broke his heart to think about but what else was he supposed to think? Annabelle had hated Mark so it was only natural to hate anything reminding her of him.

"Cooper!" Joie yelled as he struggled to keep up. "Cooper just stop for a minute! Cooper!"

Cooper ignored him and easily kept ahead of him the whole way home. He went into the house, not exactly sure about what he was going to do. His hands were shaking like crazy and it felt like he was a stranger inside his whole body. He tried to get a hold of himself but he lost it when he found Mark in the kitchen. Just looking at him made him sick and made him lose his temper. "I know."

"You know what?" Mark asked, not looking up from his whiskey.

"That you're my father."

That got Mark's attention. "You do huh?"

"Yeah."

There was a very long, uncomfortable silence. "You wanted Mom to have an abortion," Cooper finally said. "You wanted her to kill me."

"Hey, I didn't give a shit what she did," Mark said with a shrug. His words were starting to slur together and deep down, Cooper knew that he really should have stopped right then and there. But he didn't. He was way too pissed off.

"You're a fucking asshole," Cooper growled. "You fucking touched her-"

"She started it."

"Liar. She would never touch you. She hated your guts."

Mark snorted and got up to his feet. "Yeah well the feeling was mutual. That fucking bitch-"

Cooper grabbed Mark and slammed him up against the wall. "Don't you fucking call her that! You hear me?"

Mark scowled. "Get yer damn hands off me boy."

"You take it back," Cooper ordered. "You take it back right now!"

"Make me," Mark taunted. He pushed Cooper back and smoothed down his shirt. "Look, I admit that I fucked her. But it was a mistake. That whole night was a mistake."

Cooper clenched his teeth and shook his head. "And what about me? Huh?"

"Look, you're James's problem, not mine," Mark said with a shrug. "He wanted you and he got you. Now-"

Cooper couldn't take it anymore. Without thinking twice he decked Mark right in the face, so angry that he was seeing red. He let out an incoherent snarl, hitting Mark over and over again without even realizing how much of a rage he was in. He was so enraged that he didn't realize that Mark was making a move until he was punched in the stomach and grabbed by the throat. He continued swinging at Mark at first, but then he realized that Mark was _really_ choking him. He wasn't just trying to defend himself; he had both of his hands around Cooper's throat and was throttling the shit out of him.

"Stop! Let him go!"

"Marky no! Bad Marky!"

Through the blackness that was trying to take him in, Cooper could see Joie coming at Mark, but that was all he got to see. Mid-way through passing out he felt himself being thrown to the floor and he heard more yelling and then he heard and saw nothing more for the next several hours.


	12. Chapter 12

James nearly broke the front door as he came barreling through it. He had gotten a call from a hysterical Joie, who told him about the physical altercation that had taken place between Mark and Cooper. To say that James was upset would be a major understatement. "MARK!" he shouted at the top of his lungs. He was absolutely furious with his boyfriend. "MARK!" He headed straight to the kitchen, where he found the older man holding an icepack up to his face. "You fucking son of a bitch…"

Mark groaned as he looked at James. "Lawson…"

James didn't want to hear it. He grabbed Mark by his shirt and slammed him up against the wall as hard as he could. "What the FUCK is your problem?" Mark was so lucky that he was who he was; if he wasn't there would be a lot of stabbing happening right at that moment. "That was my SON! Who do you think you are to put your hands on him?" He wrapped one of his hands around Mark's throat and squeezed it roughly. "How about I choke you until you pass out?"

Mark made a half hearted attempt to push James away but it didn't work. He had drank too much and was starting to get sleepy, so he was no match for James. "He attacked me first," he slurred out. His alcohol filled breath made James wrinkle his nose and move his head back just a tad bit. "Fucking came in here punching me-"

"What did you do?" James asked impatiently. "What did you do to make him attack you?"

"Nothing!" Mark said defensively. "Fucking kid came in here going apeshit because he found out I'm his real father and-"

"WHAT?" James felt all the blood drain right out of his face. This was not good. It wasn't good at all. "How did he find out? Did you tell him?"

"No! I didn't deny it when he told me he knew but I didn't say it! Why the fuck would I tell him? He's your fucking boy, not mine." Mark threw his icepack down and shook his head. "Fucker knows not to fucking confront me on shit when I'm drunk. He-"

"Don't you DARE turn the blame on him!" James snarled. He was defending Cooper even though Cooper did know better than to get in Mark's face when he was drunk. "You hear me?" He shook his head as Mark just grunted and rubbed his sore face. "Just go to bed you jackass. You fucking need to sleep this shit off."

"I'm not a child," Mark mumbled as he staggered off towards the living room so he could pass out on the couch. James took a moment to just stand there and collect himself, knowing that the conversation he was going to have to have with Cooper was not going to go well. There was no way it possibly could. It was no secret that Cooper violently disliked Mark and they had had plenty of fights about him staying with Mark despite the way he acted. This damn revelation was only going to add more fuel to the fire and cause a boat load of problems. "Damn it," he cursed under his breath. He grabbed the ice pack and threw it back in the freezer before heading upstairs.

"Daddy?"

James stopped halfway up the stairs and saw that Connor was coming towards him. "What's the matter?" he asked when he noticed that Connor's eyes were red and puffy.

"Marky hurt Coopy," Connor whimpered sadly. "And Coopy says you're not really his daddy." He rubbed his eyes with both of his fists and looked up at James innocently. "Is that true Daddy?"

James sighed and scooped the lanky eleven year old up into his arms. "It's complicated Connor. I need to go talk to Cooper first but I'll explain it to you next, I promise."

"You can tell us at the same time," Connor objected. "I'll be a good listener Daddy, I promise!"

"I know but I really need to talk to him alone-"

"Mean! Mean mean mean MEAN!" Connor wiggled out of James's grasp and stormed off, making James sigh and shake his head. He would have to deal with Connor later. Right now he was going to try to deal with Cooper. He finished going up the stairs and went to Cooper's door. "Cooper?" he said as he knocked on the door. "Can I come in?"

There was no answer at first. James waited as patiently as he could, but then he knocked again. "Cooper?"

The door opened this time around but it wasn't Cooper who answered it. It was Joie. "How is he?" James asked immediately.

"Upset," Joie whispered. "Like really really upset."

James suspected as much. "I need to talk to him."

Joie looked apprehensive about that idea. "I don't think-"

"Let him in." Cooper's voice scared the crap out of both James and Joie. "He's not going to go away otherwise."

Joie nodded, even though he still looked extremely apprehensive about this idea. "I'll be um…somewhere else," he said as he walked away, leaving James to go into the room and shut the door behind him. Cooper was sitting on his bed with his knees pulled up to his chest, his gaze down until James started approaching him. Then he looked up and revealed not only how angry he was but also displayed the bruises on his neck from where Mark had choked him.

"Jesus Christ…" James muttered. He ran a hand over his face and shook his head slowly. He didn't know what else to say. "Cooper…" He winced as Cooper's expression didn't change. "So um…how did you find out?" That question needed to be asked because honestly, James didn't know how the fuck he had found out in the first place.

"Mom's diaries," Cooper replied.

James was taken off guard by that. "You read them? Why would you even…"

"I don't know, okay? I just…you keep all of her stuff in that old house and Joie and I went in because Connor ran in there…I wanted something that was _hers_. I wanted to be close to _her._" Cooper chuckled bitterly. "I should have known better than to read it. I hate that I know this. My whole life is one big fucking lie."

James shook his head. "It's not. Don't talk like that."

Cooper acted like he hadn't heard him. "You know, I always used to think Mark hated me because not only I could see through his bullshit but I called him out on it. Connor's too young to understand, Bearer doesn't give a shit, Glenn is too loyal and you're too fucking blinded by love-"

"Cooper please-"

"-but that wasn't it at all. He fucking hates me because I remind him of Mom. He hated her and treated her like crap and you not only knew about it but you _let_ him do it! You _let_ him act however he wanted and I'm fucking _disgusted_ with you."

James winced at his words. "It's not that simple-"

"It IS that simple!" Cooper was too angry to hear any side of the story that didn't agree with the way he saw things. "That was MOM! The way he acted…" He shook his head in disgust. "He called her a bitch before I punched him earlier. Did he tell you that?" He chuckled bitterly when James didn't respond. "Of course he didn't." He sneered suddenly and got really nasty. "That doesn't bother you does it? You'll just let him do and say whatever he wants and you'll sweep it under the rug because you're his whipped little puppy dog."

James shook his head. "Cooper stop. Just stop. You're not being fair-"

"Fair? My real father is a man I hate! My real father denied me from day one and told Mom to get an abortion if she didn't want me! Mom hated him. She didn't want a baby from him."

"That doesn't mean she didn't want you," James said, trying to calm Cooper back down before he went even more crazy. "She loved so much-"

"She would hate that you were still with him," Cooper interjected. "She would. I know she would."

James shook his head. He wasn't going to debate that. Not only would Cooper not understand, he wouldn't even _want_ to get it. "Cooper I'm sorry. You were never supposed to find out…look, fuck Mark, okay? Forget about him. He doesn't matter."

Cooper snorted loudly at that. "Your words don't mean shit."

"They don't?"

"No. You want to know why?" Cooper kept going before James could even begin to answer. "Because you don't mean them. You're so fucking stuck on Mark that you're going to let him stick around, no matter how much it fucking hurts me just to have to look at his fucking face. Hell by tomorrow I'll bet you'll be mad at me for hitting him even though he DESERVED it and you'll be fucking him and begging him not to leave you, just like you always fucking do."

"Cooper…" James didn't even know how to defend himself at this point. He had never seen Cooper this angry. It was actually scaring him because he didn't know how to fix this. This secret being revealed had single handily fucked Cooper up, which was what he had always been afraid of it doing.

"I'm going to bed," Cooper said angrily. He laid down and turned off the lamp that was by his bed. "I don't want to talk anymore."

"Cooper just let me-"

"Good night _Uncle James_."

James felt like had just got hit in the chest by a bowling ball. Those words…if Cooper understood the impact those words had on him he probably didn't even care. Completely defeated and feeling like the biggest jackass on the planet, James left the room, passing an eavesdropping Joie and a pissed off Connor on his way out the front door. His chest was aching horribly and he had to go hunting to try to make it better. At this point he doubted it would even work but he had to try. If he could at least get his head cleared, he could maybe think of a way to undo the damage that had been done to poor Cooper.


	13. Chapter 13

"You were way too harsh on him you know."

Cooper didn't respond to Joie's words. After James had left his room Joie had come back in and laid down with him on the bed. They hadn't said anything for the longest time but now Joie was intent on talking about the situation.

"Uncle James…you know that was uncalled for," Joie said, blinking when Cooper sat up and glared at him.

"Uncalled for?" Cooper reapeated. "Really?"

"Yes," Joie confirmed firmly. "Poppa James loves you. You know that. You and Connor are his world."

Cooper snorted loudly at that. "No, _Mark_ is his fucking world. Connor and I are just his responsibility."

Joie shook his head. "That's not true and you know that."

"Do I? My whole fucking life is a lie Jo. Dad isn't my dad. Mark is. Do you have any idea how much I hate that? You haven't known him as long as I have. You haven't seen just how big of an asshole he could be. He's always fucking looked at me like I was garbage, he treated my mother like shit and just look what he's done to my dad! It's fucking ridiculous. He fucking stands there and acts like he's entitled to have Dad when all he fucking does is cheat on him and constantly lie to him."

"I know he does," Joie said. He was not about to disagree with Cooper on any of those points. Not only did he have no reason to, but this was not the time to be doing much disagreeing. Cooper was angry and needed to vent and he was going to let him do so.

"I mean…shit, Mom died seven years ago and that mother fucker promised Dad that he would divorce Jodi. He was all over Dad, promising the mother fucking world and guess what happened? He fucking lied and didn't do a god damn thing. He just fucking kept doing his own thing, not giving a shit that he was hurting Dad at all." Cooper shook his head, trying to search his pockets for cigarettes and getting mad when he didn't find any. "I fucking hated him for day one. I really did. As soon as I was old enough to realize what a bastard he was I fucking hated him. And it fucking drove me nuts to have Dad always defend him but now…now I'm just fucking furious with Dad. I mean he KNEW this ENTIRE time that Mark was my real father and he knew how Mark felt about me but he stays with him? Do I matter so little that he fucking just stays with him even after all of this bullshit?"

Joie took a little time to think about the best way to answer that. Saying the wrong thing at the moment was pretty much the worst thing he could do. He did not want Cooper getting even more upset and shutting him out of anger. "I think…that Poppa James doesn't know how to let Mark go," he said slowly. "They've been together forever now. There has got to be something to their relationship that keeps Poppa James around, even if we don't know what it is."

Cooper snorted in disbelief. "Yeah right." He couldn't believe that if he tried. He had never seen anything good in Mark and he wasn't about to start seeing any of that shit now.

Joie sighed and kissed Cooper's forehead. "You know what? Just forget Mark. So what if he's your biological father? That doesn't mean shit. James was the one who stepped up the plate to raise you when he didn't have to."

"He fucking lied-"

"You're miserable now that you know the truth!" Joie pointed out. "Poppa James hid the truth to protect you. I mean really, would you have told you if you had been in his shoes?"

Cooper didn't say anything. The answer to that was no, but he really couldn't say anything at the moment. He had a lump in his throat the size of a baseball and it was hard to even breathe.

"Oh baby…" Joie wrapped his arms around Cooper and hugged him tightly. He obviously expected to Cooper to cry or some shit like that but Cooper had no intentions of doing anything like that. As angry as he was, breaking down seemed like a victory for Mark and that could not be allowed.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" Joie asked quietly. He was curling his fingers in Cooper's hair while rocking back and forth slightly.

"I can think of something…" Cooper turned his head and brushed his lips against Joie's, his body tingling when he heard Joie's breath catch. "Do you love me?"

"Yes," Joie replied without hesitation.

That was all Cooper needed to hear. He kissed Joie firmly, deepening it the instant Joie kissed him back. Joie's lips tasted like the strawberry lip gloss he always wore and the inside of his mouth tasted like orange tic tacs. It made for an interesting taste but Cooper absolutely loved it.

"The door," Joie whispered as Cooper began kissing his way down his neck. "It's not locked."

"So?" Cooper replied. He bit down on the pale flesh, leaving a nice size mark behind.

"What if Connor tried to come in?"

That question was enough to make Cooper get up and lock the door so Connor couldn't come in and interrupt them. "Better?"

"Much," Joie confirmed.

"Good." Cooper stripped off his shirt and tossed it aside as he came back over to the bed. "I've never understood how you can wear these," he said as he helped Joie get his knee high rainbow colored socks off of him.

"Hey, you know I rock them," Joie pointed out. He slipped his own shirt off before grabbing Cooper by the arm and pulling him back down on the bed. Cooper ended up back on top of him, but managed to catch himself so he didn't crush him on accident. Their kissing was becoming more frantic now and Cooper's hands wondered up Joie's skirt, groping him shamelessly through his underwear. His own jeans were getting unbearably tight and Joie did not help matters by slowly rubbing him through the denim material.

"Tease…"

"Me? What about you Mr. Grabby Hands?" Joie slapped Cooper's hands away so he could shimmy out of his skirt. Cooper whistled obnoxiously as he did so, which made him roll his eyes and slap him on the chest. "Perv."

Cooper chuckled and took off his jeans and boxers, very relieved to get out of the confines that was his clothing. "You love me though."

"I do." Joie tossed his skirt aside and sat up so he could kiss Cooper's lips. That sprung another make-out session and Cooper laid Joie back down on the bed, reaching over to the top drawer of his desk and trying to grab the lube that he had in there. At first he thought he had it but then he realized it was the superglue and that was really not the shit he wanted to grab. "Damn it!"

Joie laughed as he continued to search for the lube. "Well if you wanted to stay inside of me forever that would have worked great."

Cooper chuckled when he finally did find the lube. "Yeah. It was a tempting thought really. But from a practical standpoint there was no way it could work." He popped up the cap and drizzled a decent amount of lube on to his fingers, rubbing them together to warm it up a little bit before kissing Joie again. Using their making out as a distraction, he carefully slipped two fingers into Joie's body, stopping when the smaller man hissed loudly. "Are you okay?" he asked immediately. "Do you want to stop?"

Joie shook his head. "I'm fine," he said as he took a deep breath. "Just go slow."

Cooper nodded, not intending on doing it any other way. Joie was so tight that he had trouble just scissoring his two fingers and he started sucking on Joie's neck, leaving a whole trail of hickeys in his wake. Eventually he was able to add a third finger and began working his fingers faster, turning Joie into a panting, writhing mess underneath him.

"Oh fuck," Joie groaned, pushing back against Cooper's hand to make his fingers go in deeper. "I need…oh fuck…" He swallowed and shook his head. "Now. Need you now."

Cooper nodded and removed his fingers so he could pour more lube on his hand and coat his cock with it. He was so hard that it hurt to touch himself, but he maintained his control so he could get himself way beyond sufficiently lubricated and push into Joie's tight hole with as little resistance as possible. "Are you okay?" he asked when he saw Joie wince.

Joie nodded. "Just give me a minute."

"Kay." Cooper began placing little kisses all over Joie's shoulder. "I love you."

Joie grinned and kissed his cheek. "Not as much as I love you."

Cooper quirked his eyebrow. "Wanna bet on that?"

"Maybe later."

Cooper made sure to take a mental note of that before slowly moving because he couldn't take being still any longer. Joie whimpered slightly and Cooper tried to stop because he thought it was from pain but Joie shook his head and wrapped his arms around him. "I'm fine," he assured him.

"You sure?"

"Yes."

Cooper wasn't entirely sure whether to believe him or not but he couldn't stop to really argue about it now. He was far too horny for that. He began moving again, going as slow as he could stand it and then eventually speeding up when Joie began digging his nails into his back. The whole situation with Mark was completely out of his mind now; all he could focus on was the here and now. The smell of Joie's skin, the way Joie whimpered and moaned his name, the way Joie's heat fit around him like a glove…his entire world was Joie and that was the way he wanted it to stay. He couldn't imagine it being any different.

He reached down and wrapped his hand around Joie's dick, stroking it in time with his thrusts. Joie was moaning uncontrollably now and Cooper quickly kissed him to quiet him down a little bit. That worked for about three seconds and then they were both nearly screaming as they came, Joie's orgasm triggering Cooper's. "Oh fuck," Cooper muttered, panting for breath and enjoying the way his world was spinning. He had sex loads of times before this (he had lost his virginity at the age of twelve just to merely do it) but never before had it ever felt like that. That had been way beyond anything he had felt before in his life. He kissed Joie's forehead before slowly pulling out of him and laying down beside him. Joie cuddled up to him and without needing to say another word, the two of them drifted off to sleep.

…

Mark wasn't aware that he had passed out on the couch until he heard the front door open. At first he thought it was a part of his dream but then he rolled over and ended up falling off the couch and that woke him right the hell up. "God damn it," he muttered, staying there on the ground for a moment as he tried to collect himself. He was still drunk but he wasn't nearly as drunk as he was before. "Fuck me…" He slowly got up and rubbed his sore face. Cooper had quite the fucking right hook. He didn't know how he was going to explain away these bruises without Vince thinking he had been in a bar fight and flipping his shit about it.

"Lawson!" Mark grunted, stumbling towards the front hallway and nearly tripping over Connor's toys in the process. "That you?" He didn't get an answer but he managed to see James storming off upstairs, so he followed him and managed to stop James from locking him out of their bedroom. "My room too," he slurred. "No lock me out."

James glared daggers at him as plopped down on the bed. He tried to ignore it but he couldn't. James was making it absolutely impossible. "I'm sorry okay?" he said defensively. "Now quit looking at me like that!"

"Oh yes, sorry is going to make everything better!" James said sarcastically. He threw his hands up and shook his head. "Sorry takes care of everything! It fucking makes Cooper magically forget that god damn secret and it takes away the damage it did."

Mark frowned and got back up, wobbling slightly as he struggled to keep his balance. "You're exaggerating Lawson. It's not that bad."

"Oh yeah? Look at your face and tell me that again."

"Well the kid is a fucking-"

"You know what? Don't. Just don't," James interrupted. He really sounded upset. "I don't want to talk about it any more."

"Fine," Mark said. He was okay with not talking about it. He had enough shit to deal with without adding Cooper's drama to it. He had a failing marriage, two significant others that were driving him insane, a stupid groupie who would not take the hint that he wanted nothing to do with her any more and a job that was starting to make him feel like he was going insane. All of this shit was not crap he wanted to deal with; every bottle of Jack Daniels or whatever other kind of whiskey that was available was an escape, yet it always almost seemed to make matters even worse somehow. It was a fucking shit storm and he was trapped in it.

"I gotta take a shower," James muttered. He grabbed his pajamas and gave Mark one last look before leaving the room. Mark groaned and crawled back into bed, quickly passing back out. He never even noticed when James back in from his shower and stared at him for a good hour before going downstairs and spending a very long and sleepless night on the couch.


	14. Chapter 14

Neither Cooper nor Joie got out of bed the next day until about noon and even then it wasn't actually by any sort of choice. Joie woke up because he heard someone trying to break in and he got scared and shook Cooper until he was awake. Cooper, being the brave boy that he was, got up and grabbed his knife, ready to protect Joie and kill the intruder. As it turned out though, the intruder was just James trying to get through the window and not being nearly as stealthy as he thought he was being. "What in the _hell_ do you think you're doing?" Cooper asked incredulously as he opened the window the rest of the way and shook his head at James.

James smiled sheepishly. "Checking on you," he replied. "I was worried…" His eyes widened as he noticed Cooper and Joie's half naked state. "Oooohhh…."

"Dad don't," Cooper immediately groaned.

James blinked and raised his eyebrows. "I'm Dad again?" That question wasn't asked nearly as obnoxiously as it could have. In fact, James almost sounded like a hopeful little boy trying to get presents out of his parents and it made Cooper feel like the biggest jackass in the world because of the shit he had said to him the previous night.

"Dad…I'm sorry okay?" Cooper paused a bit because "sorry" didn't really feel like an appropriate term. It just didn't seem to be enough because what he had said had been really really bad. "What I said, I didn't mean it. I really didn't."

"I know," James said and Cooper instantly knew he was lying, which hurt. It meant that it had really hurt James's feelings and once again, Cooper felt like a jackass. "Look, Mark's gone. You and Joie don't have to hide up here. You can come downstairs and I'll make lunch."

Cooper made a face and immediately shook his head. "Can't you just order out instead? Or let me and Joie make lunch."

James's face fell slightly. "What are you implying?"

"Well…" Lucky for Cooper, he was saved from answering by a rather interesting sight down on the ground below him. "Connor! What the hell are you doing?"

Connor smiled innocently as he continued to saw away at the ladder with the handsaw he had stolen from the garage. "Nothing!" he chirped like a the good little boy he wasn't.

James looked down and his eyes just about popped out of his head when he saw what Connor was doing. "CONNOR MICHAEL LAWSON! YOU PUT THAT DOWN THIS INSTANT!"

Connor gasped, not used to being yelled at like that. "MEAN!" he screeched, throwing the handsaw down and then throwing himself down too so he could scream and cry and carry on like a two year old.

"Oh Jesus," James muttered, immediately climbing back down so he could soothe Connor. Him and crying kids were a horrible mix. He just couldn't stand to see it. It was the reason Cooper and Connor had been spoiled rotten as kids. They had figured out early on that all they had to do was shed a couple tears and anything and everything they wanted was theirs.

"Have fun with that Dad!" Cooper said, shutting the window so he didn't have to listen to Connor's fit. He looked back at Joie, who was starting to get dressed. "Awe…I liked the other look better," he said with a pout. "Take it back off."

Joie giggled and shook his head. "I'm hungry. I can't go downstairs and eat half naked."

Cooper pouted his lips and sighed dramatically. "Well…I guess that's a good point." He reluctantly began grabbing his own clothes so he could get dressed. "You should get your strength up anyway."

Joie giggled and raised his eyebrows. "Are you implying that we're going to be doing something that will take that strength away?"

"Maybe," Cooper replied coyly. He slipped his shirt on and then practically jumped into his jeans so he could then snake his arm around Joie's waist and kiss him gently. "Would you have a problem with that?"

"No," Joie giggled. He put his arms around Cooper's neck and they kissed again, this one lingering longer than the first one. "I would have no problem with that at all."

"Good." They kissed one last time before heading downstairs. About halfway down the stairs, the doorbell rang, and Cooper reluctantly untangled himself from Joie so he could open the door. It turned out to be Julie carrying three large boxes of pizza and he was suddenly insanely happy to see her. "You read my mind," he said as he took the boxes for her and began to carry them towards the kitchen.

"Glad I can be of service," Julie said with a grin. James's long time assistant had her blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail and had her giant purse hanging loosely from her elbow. "Hey Joie!"

"Hey Julie," Joie said back. This was a very little known fact but the two of them were actually relatives. His uncle was her cousin but nobody but Joie actually acknowledged her because the family looked down at her for her career choice. Being the assistant for a man who owned a porn enterprise was just as bad as being in a porno so she no longer existed in their book.

"You going to the little reunion thing today?" Julie asked. "I thought about sneaking in and giving Ira and Lenora a heart attack-"

"That's _today_?" Joie squeaked as Cooper spun back around, nearly dropping the pizzas in the process. Joie's parents had been planning this stupid family reunion for months and they had been up Joie's ass about going to it. But in the course of everything else that had been going on, it had completely slipped Joie's mind.

"Oh shit," Cooper said. He placed the pizza down on the table. "Shit shit shit!"

Joie glanced at the clock. "I've got another couple hours so-"

"No, _we_ have got a couple hours," Cooper quickly said. "There's no way you're going to be with your family by yourself."

"Yeah really," Julie agreed. "Ira is a fucking prick-"

"Dad's not that bad," Joie said with a shrug.

Julie just laughed. "Honey, Cooper is going with you. I don't think you could keep him away if you tried."

"Yeah," Cooper agreed. He put his arm around Joie's shoulder and kissed his cheek. "You can't get rid of me now. You're stuck with me whether you like it or not."

Joie grinned and rested his head against Cooper's shoulder. "I'm not stuck with you. I like being with you too much to think of it like that."

"Good. And as long as we've got that established, let's eat. I'm fucking starving."

…

Two hours later, Joie and Cooper were walking into the convention center that had been rented out for the Rosenberg family reunion, both of them dressed in button down shirts and black pants (Cooper's was black and Joie's was red). Joie had reluctantly temporarily parted ways with his wig and his usual clothing style because his father would have skinned him alive if he had shown up to this thing in drag. According to Mr. Ira Rosenberg, a transvestite in the family was a "shame" and something that needed to be hidden at all cost. That attitude pissed Cooper off to no end and the worst part was that Joie wouldn't let him do anything about it. _One of these days, I'm not going to care what Joie says,_ he told himself. _I'm going to get my hands on that mother fucker and I will end his stupid fucking existence._

"Okay let's not stay too long," Joie whispered, wringing his hands together because he and Cooper were going to get themselves lynched if they held hands here. "Let's just walk around and mingle for a little bit to establish we are here and then bail out the door when Mom and Dad aren't looking."

"Sounds good to me," Cooper said with a nod. He never understood the appeal of these kinds of events. This just seemed utterly ridiculous to him. "Do you know half these people JoJo?"

Joie shook his head. "No. I don't have any contact with anyone in my family except for…" He gulped as Ira and Lenora began to make their way towards them. "Mom and Dad…"

Cooper's spine stiffened up considerably and his eyes narrowed as Ira eyed him like he was some sort of leper. Oh the things he wanted to do to that bastard…

"Oh good, you cleaned yourself up without us even telling you," Lenora said, smoothing down Joie's hair and making both Joie and Cooper twitch because she had just implied that the way Joie usually looked made him dirty.

"What's _he_ doing here?" Ira asked, giving Cooper the evil eye.

Joie just shook his head. "I wanted him here Daddy. I-"

"And I told you that I didn't," Ira growled. "He-"

"Is standing right here and will take off your fucking head if you even begin to point that finger at him," Cooper growled. "You hear me?"

Ira glared at him but before things could get uglier, he saw something else that caught his attention and he stormed off, Lenora quickly following behind him.

Joie shook his head at Cooper. "You shouldn't have done that."

"He looked like he was going to hit your right here and now!" Cooper said defensively.

"I know but-"

"But nothing," Cooper interrupted. "He's never fucking touching you again without having to answer to me. You got that?"

Joie sighed, knowing he could not win this fight. "Let's just go okay? We showed up and that-" His voice trailed off as he glanced over to the door. "Shit."

"What?" Cooper asked, looking around in confusion.

"Javier."

"Who?"

"That guy we saw on our first date."

"The one you freaked out over?" Cooper could see him now. The mother fucker was actually dragging Joie's cousin Ruth around by the hand like she was a fucking child or something.

"Dad is going to flip his shit," Joie said with a wince. He grabbed Cooper's arm and began to pull him away. "Come on, let's get out of here."

Cooper started to object because the shit was just getting good but then he caught sight of the look in Javier's eyes when he saw Joie and it made him want to go over there and hit him and then demand to know what the fuck he was doing looking at his boyfriend like that. But Joie refused to stay, pulling and tugging on Cooper's arm until he had finally managed to drag him outside. "Joie what the hell?" Cooper asked incredulously. "What is your deal with this Javier guy?"

"Nothing."

Cooper didn't believe him. His tone was way too defensive to be normal. He planted both of his feet in the ground and pulled Joie back, forcing him to turn around. "Did he do something to you?" he asked.

"No," Joie automatically denied.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes! The guy is just a sleaze ball who make me uncomfortable, okay? Now can we go please?"

Cooper still did not feel like Joie was being completely honest with him but he allowed himself to be dragged to the car while dropping the subject-for now anyway. They were going to have another conversation about this though. He was going to make damn sure of that.


	15. Chapter 15

Despite his best attempts to get it out of his mind, Cooper couldn't get the feeling that something really really bad had happened between Joie and Javier out of his mind. And it was driving him absolutely insane. He wanted-no, he NEEDED to know what had happened. He fucking needed to know and he needed to know immediately. And it was frustrating because Joie was not about to divulge that information to him. He loved him so fucking much but Joie absolutely refused to talk about him. He just clammed up or changed the subject or worse even tried to bail which really really didn't set well with him. He didn't want Joie to be away from him ever. He wanted him by his side at all times where he could always be with him and keep him safe. It just felt wrong being away from each other. It really did. It kind of scared him just how hard he had really fallen for Joie but he wasn't about to run away from it. He wanted and needed Joie desperately and he was going to be damned if that didn't happen.

"What do you want to do tonight?" Cooper asked as he played with Joie's wig. They were sprawled out on the couch, watching Jerry Springer with James and Connor and absorbed in their own little world as opposed to what was going on around them.

"I dunno," Joie replied, snuggling up against Cooper and grinning as Cooper's fingers began running up and down his arm. "I could go for a shower. I'm feeling a little…dirty."

Cooper grinned, his body stirring at the mere thought of that. "Oh yeah?"

"Uh huh." Joie giggled deviously and leaned in for a kiss.

"GO TRANNY GET YOURSELF SOME OF THAT ASS!"

Cooper and Joie both jumped and turned to face James in shock. "Dad-" Cooper stopped when he glanced at the TV and saw that there was a tranny on Springer who was brawling with a guy twice his size. "Oh." He let out a relieved sigh and settled back down. The last thing he needed was to have James screaming encouragement as he and Joie made out. That would just be too much for him to handle.

Joie let out a laugh and resumed his snuggling with Cooper. "Poppa James gets way too into that show."

"Eh, I like that he does. It keeps him distracted while I do this." Cooper kissed Joie, keeping it chaste for all of about two seconds before quite gleefully shoving his tongue into his mouth. Joie rolled his eyes but kissed him back, not even bothering to slap Cooper's hands away as they began to wander up his skirt. It was so easy to get absorbed in all of this. Just being with Joie completely distracted Cooper so any touch and kiss they gave each other became his entire world. In Joie there was perfection. He knew that without any shadow of doubt. He hadn't realized he had known it before but he did. He had always known it but it was so close to him that he just hadn't been able to see it clearly until now.

"Ewww!" Connor groaned, rudely jumping on top of them so he could spoil the mood. "That's gross! Stop it Coopy before you put a baby in Joie's tummy!"

Joie stared at Connor incredulously while Cooper bopped him on the back of the head. "Only girls can get pregnant honey," he reminded him. "Remember?"

Connor smirked and poked Joie's nose. "But you LOOK like a girl silly. And it's like that duck saying: if it looks like a girl and acts like a girl, it's going to pop out a baby because of Cooper's penis."

"What?" James said, having just heard the last part of that sentence because Springer had gone to commercial. He stared at the three of them incredulously, trying to figure out what he had just missed out on. "What the hell are you three doing over there? Cooper you better not be impregnating Joie with Connor on top of you! He's too young for that kind of stuff."

Cooper slapped himself on the forehead, not able to believe that that had just come out of his father's mouth. "Oh my God would you stop?" he begged. "Please, just be quiet."

"Why?" James asked innocently. "What did I say?"

Cooper decided to not even go there and instead focused on trying to get Connor off of him and Joie. "Would you move?" he asked rudely, trying to shove Connor away without appearing that he was shoving him because that would just get him in trouble.

"No!" Connor said defiantly. He slapped Cooper on the chest and refused to budge. "I want you and Joie to take me to a movie tonight."

Cooper made a face and immediately shook his head. "No way. Joie and I have plans."

"You ALWAYS have plans!" Connor lamented angrily. "You and Joie are always up each other's butts-"

"Literally," James said with a snort.

Cooper glared at James for that. "Quiet you."

Connor scowled and turned Cooper's head back towards him. "You're mean! You're always ignoring me! Joie's my friend too you can't hog him all the time!"

"Why can't you just play with your other friends?" Cooper snapped, trying to ignore the frowns that Joie and James were both giving him.

"Because I don't have any," Connor stated bluntly.

Well shit. Now Cooper felt like a tremendous asshole. He let out a loud sigh and glanced at Joie, who was looking at him to do the right thing. Of course he still didn't really want to because the right thing sounded far from appealing but he no longer had any real choice in the matter. "Fine," he agreed. "We'll take you to go see a movie."

"YAY!" Connor cheered. He hugged Cooper's neck tightly and just about choked him. "I wanna see Godzilla!"

"But that movie is supposed to suck-"

"I don't care! I wanna see Godzilla!"

"And Godzilla we shall see," Joie promised, playing with Connor's hair affectionately. "You just have to promise to be a good boy for me and Cooper, okay?"

Connor snorted and switched from hugging Cooper to hugging Joie. "I'm ALWAYS a good boy," he declared, missing the look on everyone else's faces because they all knew that was a bold face lie. "I don't know what you think you've heard but I'm always always always a good boy. Right Daddy?"

James blinked and started stuttering, caught between lying to appease Connor and telling the truth as he knew it. He was saved from really saying anything though by the sound of the front door opening. "What the hell…" He got up to his feet and started to go out and see who had just come in when Mark stepped into the room and made Cooper gag by planting a big old kiss on him right there in front of everyone.

"Yucky!" Connor declared while Joie quickly looked away. Cooper wished he could look away but he couldn't. His eyes were glued to the train wreck in front of him and it pissed him off. "What the hell are you doing here?" he asked angrily.

Mark didn't even acknowledge him. He just continued shoving his tongue down James's throat and Cooper was sickened to see that James was being completely won over by this display of affection. Then again though, he shouldn't have been surprised. Mark always did this. If he left on bad terms, he would come swooping back in with something that would make James melt and boom! All their problems were magically solved. It sickened Cooper but the worst part about it was that James refused to listen to him. He just let Mark do what he wanted without a single thought to the fact that nothing was really being solved between them.

"Dad!" Cooper said in exasperation, getting ready to get up and pry the two older men apart before he vomited on the spot.

James waved his hand dismissively before pulling back from Mark and grinning. "Upstairs?"

Mark just smirked and dragged James out of the room, making Cooper slap his forehead in exasperation. "Oh for the love of God…" He shook his head in disbelief before glancing at Joie and Connor. "Come on. We're getting out of here before they get started." It was bad enough that he knew the "make-up" sex was coming but he would damned if he stuck around to hear it. That would just be too much for him to handle.

…

"Hey! Stop it!" Connor yelled, jumping up and down and pointing to the screen and making a total ass out of himself. "You leave Godzilla alone you meanies!"

Cooper groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation. This was why he absolutely hated taking Connor to the movies. "Connor stop yelling. You can't yell here."

"But they're going to hurt him!" Connor whined, giving Cooper a scandalized look for not being on his side. "They want to kill him Coopy and he didn't do anything wrong! He really didn't!"

"Sssshhhh!" an angry person growled, which made Connor even more nuts.

"You ssshhhh!" he snapped. "You fuck face I'll kill you!"

Cooper quickly slapped the back of Connor's head. "Fucking sit down and shut up before I make you leave without seeing the end of the movie," he growled. "You hear me?"

"Mean!" Connor flopped back down on his seat and stared at the screen unhappily.

"Jesus Christ," Cooper muttered, looking over at Joie, who was eating all the popcorn. "You gonna share any of that?"

"Do I gotta?" Joie asked, only half joking as he protectively held on to the popcorn.

Cooper smirked. "I could make you."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah." Cooper leaned over and began kissing and nibbling on Joie's neck. Joie giggled and made a half hearted attempt to swat him away before letting him do whatever he wanted. Cooper happily proceeded to leave a giant hickey on Joie's neck before sticking his hand in the popcorn and shoving a giant handful into his mouth. "I win," he declared with a full mouth.

Joie snorted. "Only because I let you win."

"Oh really?"

"Yup."

Cooper smirked and went to resume his kissing when a water bottle came flying from the front of the theater and ended up whacking Joie right in the face. "Fucking queers!" Cooper knew that voice. It belonged to Clyde and he could hear Dan howling with laughter and something inside Cooper snapped. Without any kind of hesitation he leapt to his feet and chased after the two jocks, who had started running for their lives when they caught sight of the utterly enraged look on Cooper's face. Joie tried to grab Cooper's arm and hold him back but Cooper got away, literally almost bulldozing his way past the people trying to get back to their seats in his pursuit of the two idiots who had messed with Joie for the last time. The two of them loved fucking with his boyfriend? Well fuck them. No more. He was putting an end to it and he was doing it now.

He chased the two of them out of the theater and followed them down the street, smirking as they blindly turned into an alley. _You're making this way too easy._ He turned the corner and managed to block the blow Clayton tried to deliver with a tire iron he had picked up off the ground. Dan tried to rush him right then but Cooper kicked his foot out and managed to get him in the nuts, sending him crumbling to the ground. Clayton let go of the tire iron and went to throw a punch but Cooper was way too fast for him. Faster than someone could blink he whipped his knife out and drove it deep into Clayton's stomach, enjoying the warm blood that covered his hand before yanking the knife out and grabbing Dan by the hair as he tried to escape. "Where do you think you're going?" he growled, pressing the blade against Dan's throat and slitting it, chuckling as the blood began to pour out of him and he died in his grasp. "Stupid fucks," Cooper declared as he let Dan's body drop down to the ground.

"Cooper! Cooper where are-oh my God!" Joie came around the corner with Connor and put his hand over his mouth when he saw the damage that had been done.

"Aw man, you got to hunt and I didn't?" Connor whined. "You suck Coopy!" He kicked Cooper in the shins before storming back towards the theater so he could finish watching the movie while Cooper cleaned up the mess he had made.

…

Three hours later Cooper found himself in the shower with Joie, who had been kind of quiet since he had discovered what Cooper had done earlier. "Are you mad at me or something?" Cooper finally asked, really really hoping that that wasn't the case. The last thing he wanted was for Joie to be mad at him. That just was not something he thought he could ever really handle.

Joie sighed and rinsed the shampoo out of his hair before answering. "No…I just…don't you think you went a little extreme back there? I mean, you just killed two of our classmates and-"

"They hurt you," Cooper interrupted, pointing to the slight bruise Joie now had courtesy of the bottle to the face he had taken earlier.

"A water bottle to the face isn't the worst thing I've ever taken," Joie stated.

"Don't remind me," Cooper muttered, clenching his fists because he knew damn well what kind of abuse Joie had taken over the years.

Joie's face softened and he shook his head as he hugged Cooper tightly. "Baby…"

"I love you," Cooper said, hugging Joie tightly and placing soft kisses on his neck. "I just…I fucking _snapped_ earlier. I fucking can't stand the thought of anyone hurting you just…no. Never again."

"Cooper sweetheart-"

Cooper cut him off with a kiss. He didn't give a shit what anyone said. When he said nobody was going to hurt Joie again he fucking meant it. He didn't care who anyone thought they was. If they had ever hurt his boyfriend or had any plans to do so, they were going to die. End of story.


	16. Chapter 16

Loud, obnoxious grunts and moans emanated from James's room, making Cooper groan in exasperation. Mark and James were at it once again. It just baffled Cooper's mind how James could go through this with Mark. It was always the same fucking pattern with them. Things were good for a short while and then shit would just hit the fan again in some way, shape or form and it would just be bad from there. It was a toxic cycle that had to be broken and he wanted to break it himself right then and there but there was one problem; Joie would not let him get up. He was sleeping on top of him and would not budge no matter how much he prodded him.

"Jo…come on JoJo get up. I gotta pee." He pouted when Joie still refused to budge. "Do you want me to piss in the bed?"

"You don't have to pee Cooper," Joie said lazily. "I hear Mark and Poppa James too so you can't fool me. I know what you're really up to."

"Oh yeah? Well shit." Cooper ran his fingers through Joie's hair and sighed. "You know me too well."

"Yep," Joie happily confirmed. He opened his eyes and moved his head up so he could give Cooper a kiss. "You can't hide anything from me. I know all your deepest darkest secrets."

"Oh yeah? I wish I could say the same thing about you."

Joie frowned at that. "What are you talking about? You know everything about me."

"Not quite." Cooper began to rub his hand up and down Joie's bare back and gave his boyfriend a very serious look. "You've never told me what happened between you and Javier."

Joie groaned. "Cooper!"

"What?'

"Why do you want to know so bad? It's not a big deal."

"If it's not a big deal then why do you get so skittish when you see him? Why does your spine stiffen when I even say his name?" Cooper was no idiot, he knew something had gone down between Joie and Javier and he wanted to know what it was. "Please baby, tell me. Please, I'm begging you."

Joie looked away and bit down on his lower lip, keeping his silence for a few very long moments. Finally though, he broke down and reluctantly looked back at Cooper before speaking. "When I first met him he uh…he had an interest in me. He kept trying to corner me to try to get me to do uh…stuff with him but I wouldn't do it." He winced when he saw the look on Cooper's face. ""He stopped though," he said quickly. "He really did so it's not really a huge deal anymore." He winced even more when he saw that Cooper's expression wasn't about to change. "You're going to kill him aren't you?"

"Yep," Cooper confirmed without hesitation. What else could he possibly do? How could he let the guy live for trying to harm his Joie? The answer was simple: he didn't.

"Oh Cooper," Joie said with a sigh. "One day you're going to learn that killing isn't always the answer."

"Why can't it be?"

"Because that's not how the world works. Take your issues with Mark for exaple. You're not going to be allowed to kill him so how are you going to resolve the shit between you?"

Cooper had to snort at that one. "Resolve? Fuck that. I'm not resolving shit."

"Cooper-"

"No. I'm not interested." Cooper couldn't even really stomach being in the same room as Mark half the time and that had only gotten worse since finding out Mark was his biological father. He didn't fucking want to be Mark's child. He wanted to be James's real son. Parenting was not something Mark was good at; that had been proven with Gunner on various occasions and now it had been proven with him. He wanted to just forget that he had ever learned the truth and go back to believing he was James's biological child. It was harder than it sounded though. He would sometimes glance in the mirror and begin to hate himself because he got so paranoid about him having similarities to Mark. Look wise, beyond the naturally red hair he had, he had a lot more of the Lawson looks than the Calaway ones; Annabelle had saved him from that end. But genetics had to come into play somewhere. In some way he was going to have to be like Mark and he couldn't fucking stand it. He really couldn't. He wanted to fight it with every inch of his being but could he really fight himself? Could he beat that part of himself out of him?

Joie sighed again and gave Cooper a serious look. "I overheard Poppa James talking to Mark. He wants to the two of you to start getting along."

"He also wants Mark to quit drink, practice fidelity and have Connor stop being so fucking afraid of Santa," Cooper shot back. "The man wants lots of stuff that just ain't gonna happen."

Joie shook his head, giving up on the conversation because he knew he was fighting a lost cause. "What am I gonna do with you?" he asked in exasperation.

"Kiss me," Cooper said quickly. "How does that sound?"

"It sounds utterly fantastic to me." Joie kissed him, gentle and chaste at first but that didn't last long at all. Cooper deepened the kiss and made it much more frantic, drowning out the noises coming from James's room in the process. He placed his hands on Joie's hips and flipped them over so he was on top, laughing as Joie squealed loudly in protest.

"No fair," Joie pouted as Cooper began to lick and suck on his neck. "Why do you always get to be on top?"

Cooper smirked. "Because you're the bottom of this relationship."

"I can be a bottom and still be on top…"

Cooper's smirk grew bigger at that. "You saying you want to ride me babe?"

"Maybe," Joie answered coyly.

"Oh no no no no. Maybe isn't a good enough answer." Cooper nipped at Joie's lower lip before reaching down and lightly brushing his cock with his fingertips. "I need a more definitive answer than that."

Joie whimpered and arched up towards Cooper's hand. Cooper grinned and teased a tighter grip but didn't follow through with it, making the smaller man groan in disappointment. "Come on babe, tell me what you want."

Joie's eyes narrowed and instead of letting out a verbal answer he grabbed Cooper by the back of the head and kissed him as hard as he possibly could. Cooper chuckled and rolled them back over so Joie was on top of him, hissing slightly in pain because Joie had nipped his lips so hard that they started bleeding.

"That tell you anything?" Joie asked breathlessly as they finally tore their mouths off each other.

Cooper nodded while he panted for breath. "Yeah, it did. But uh…maybe you should tell me a little bit more just so I get the point."

Joie grinned. "It would be my pleasure." He kissed Cooper's lips again but this kiss didn't last nearly as long as the one before it. He broke it off so he could begin kissing his way down Cooper's body, particularly paying attention to biting at Cooper's thighs and avoiding his rapidly hardening cock (they were both still naked from their previous night's activities so they had no pesky clothing to remove).

"Damn it JoJo," Cooper pouted, trying to move Joie's head over but not having any luck with it. "You're killing me here."

"Nah. You just need to learn to have a little bit more patience." Joie bit down on Cooper's thigh one last time before surprising him by deep throating him without any warning.

"Oh fuck!" Cooper moaned, not giving a flying fuck who heard him. He involuntarily bucked his hips up and inadvertently choked poor Joie, which made him wince apologetically. "Sorry…"

Joie waved him off and began bobbing his head, sucking feverishly and digging his nails into Cooper's flesh. Cooper moaned again and laid his head back and closed his eyes, unable to keep them open even though he wanted to watch Joie go. "Fuck Joie, I love your fucking mouth."

"I can tell," Joie said with a laugh.

Cooper grinned and pulled Joie back up to him so they could kiss once again. As much as he loved the feeling of Joie's mouth around his cock, he wanted something else at the moment. He grabbed on to Joie's hips and thrusted upwards, groaning while Joie hissed loudly. "Jo…"

"I'm fine," Joie assured him, kissing him until he was back at ease. "Really."

Cooper nodded along, giving Joie a moment to adjust to his size while also trying to get control over his own self. Joie was so damn warm and tight that he had to fight the urge to cum already. "I love you," he said, kissing him again for all he was worth.

"I love you more," Joie claimed, moaning slightly as Cooper began to thrust inside of him.

"Wanna bet on that?"

Joie almost did say something to that but Cooper started to pick up the pace of his thrusts so he just moaned and moved his hips in time with the thrusts, resting his forehead against Cooper's and locking eyes with him until their simultaneous releases made them almost pass out from their all consuming force.

…

"Uncle Crispy! Come on, play with me!" Connor begged as he grabbed on to Glenn's hand and bounced up and down eagerly. "Come on come on please play with me! I've MISSED you Crispy!"

"Don't call me that," Glenn snapped irritably. "If you have to acknowledge me as your uncle, it'll be Uncle Glenn to you."

"But you're the Crispy Critter!" Connor said innocently. "I HAVE to call you Uncle Crispy! Daddy said so."

"You're daddy is a moron," Glenn muttered.

"Hey, no he's not," Joie protested weakly. "He's-" He stopped when he saw the look on Glenn's face. "Okay never mind."

Cooper shook his head. "If you're such a grouchy ass then why are you here?" He knew Glenn could get moody and shit and that was whatever; everyone got that way sometimes. But if he was going to be in the house he wasn't about to take it out on Joie and Connor.

"I'm babysitting," Glenn said unhappily. "While you and my brother and that psycho go out for dinner."

Cooper blinked and then frowned. "What are you talking about? Why would I go out to dinner with Mark and Dad?"

Glenn raised his eyebrows. "What, they didn't tell you yet? James had Mark call me and force me over here because Lawson wants you and my dear brother to work things out."

Joie's eyes widened and he shrank back a bit because of the look on Cooper's face. "Sweetie-"

"DAD!" Cooper yelled, whirling around and storming out of the room. "DAD! WHERE ARE YOU?"

James poked his head out of the office, clearly startled by Cooper's yelling. "Cooper? What-"

"Since when am I going to dinner with you and fuckface?" Cooper asked angrily. He wasn't in the mood for pleasantries. He just wanted answers and he wanted them now.

James sighed, having to know that was coming. "Since I decided that I don't want anymore civil war in this house," he answered. "Look, I know you don't like him-"

"That's a bit of understatement," Cooper said nastily. "I HATE him!"

"You don't ever give him a chance."

"No, you just give him too fucking many."

"I love him and that's not the point. I don't want you two fighting-"

"All he does is hurt you and treats me like I'm a fucking disease! I don't want anything to-"

"I told him that shit has to stop from his end too, okay?" James interrupted. "It's all going to stop once we resolve all the bullshit."

Cooper snorted. He didn't believe that for a single second. "I'm not going," he declared.

James shook his head. "Yes you are."

"No I'm not. You can't make me."

"You wanna bet on that?"

Cooper shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot. Fuck, James wasn't fucking around on this one. "Dad come on-"

"Cooper you're going, okay? Now you can either accept it and give it a shot or you can make me drag you along. It's your choice."

"Ugh…" Cooper had to literally bite his tongue to keep himself from saying anything else. He had already lost that fight and it wasn't fair because he hadn't even been given a chance.

"Come on Cooper," James pleaded. "Don't-Cooper!"

Cooper ignored him and stormed away, just about colliding into Joie In the process. "Can you believe this shit?" he asked. "He just fucking EXPECTS me to go and make nice to that asshole-"

"Honey…"

"He didn't give me a CHOICE! He just fucking thinks he can drag me around on a plan that won't even work-"

"Cooper!" Joie spoke more firmly this time, finally managing to actually get Cooper's attention.

"It's not fair," Cooper pouted.

"I know," Joie said with a sigh. He wrapped his arms around Cooper's waist and hugged him tightly. "But sweetie you gotta try to see things from his perspective. He loves you and Mark and wants you to get along."

"He just wants me to get along with Mark because he thinks that'll help with Mark not being a douche," Cooper said crankily. "It's not going to though. Mark has always hated me before I ever did anything to him and now I know why; I remind him of his gross indiscretion with Mom and he hated her guts."

Joie sighed heavily and rested his head against Cooper's chest. "I know but this is really important to Poppa James. He's done a lot for you and you should at least try it for his sake."

Cooper pouted his lips and shook his head. "That's no fair. Why do you gotta play the guilt trip card with me?"

"Because I can." Joie got up on his toes and gave Cooper a kiss. "Just go and give it a chance. It'll make Poppa James happy and then when you get back, I'll make you feel better."

"Really? You promise."

"No…I guarantee it."

…

James ended up taking Cooper and Mark to some steakhouse for dinner and if the tense silence between Cooper and Mark during the car ride there wasn't a sign of things not going great on this trip, the fact that Mark immediately ordered a beer with his food pretty much guaranteed badness. He was already buzzed and shit so any alcohol that went into his system was just feeding into the badness.

"Marky," James said quietly, reaching over and nudging the slightly older man on the arm. "Don't you have something to say?"

Mark sighed and put down the steak knife he was playing with so he could acknowledge Cooper. "Um…how was your day?"

_Like you care._ Cooper almost said this but he saw the pleading look James was giving him and decided to be at least somewhat civil. "It started out great but it uh…turned to shit real quick." He took a drink of his Coke and rolled his eyes when he saw the look James was giving him now. "…How was yours?"

"The same."

James sighed and pouted, knowing full well that they were both referencing to being dragged along to this dinner. "The steak here is good," he said, pouting more when neither Mark or Cooper said anything. "So Marky, what was that deal with throwing Mick off the top of that cell?" He was of course referring to the rapidly becoming infamous dive that Mick Foley had taken off the Hell in a Cell at King of the Ring. It was all anyone in the wrestling world was talking about now and it hadn't really set well with the Lawsons because they actually liked Mick.

Mark shrugged. "I tried to talk him out of it but he wouldn't listen. So-"

"So you not only threw him off of the damn thing but you choke slammed him through it too?" Cooper shook his head. "And the Humanitarian of the Year award goes to…"

Mark shook his head. "Don't even start that with me. He's fine so-"

"Fine? Have you talked to his wife? I'm sure she would tell a different story."

James shook his head at Cooper. He knew that he was trying to instigate a fight and he didn't want that shit. "I was thinking of taking you, Connor and Joie to the next show that comes to Vegas."

"You sure Vinnie Mac won't have a conniption just by seeing you?" Cooper asked. Vince McMahon hated James with a passion because of the chaos he always caused backstage. He had actually banned James from the backstage area and Mark had actually gotten in trouble because some of the stunts James used to pull were so bad. He was actually lucky that he was who he was in the company or he would have been in even more trouble than what he got into.

"Lawson I told you it would be better if you didn't fucking come," Mark said with a roll of his eyes. "You're going to get my ass in hot water again-"

"I'll be good though," James promised. "Come on, I just want to spend time with you…"

Mark snorted and took a giant drink of his beer. "Jesus Lawson, sound like a woman why don't you?"

Cooper's eyes narrowed as James sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "Speaking of women, how's your wife?"

James immediately shook his head. "Cooper don't-"

"She's fine," Mark said shortly.

"What about Gunner? Or wait, you're still acknowledging him as your kid right?"

Mark gave him an irritated look. "Don't even get started with me."

"Why not? I have to sit here and listen to my dad practically beg to spend time with you and I'm not supposed to say anything?"

"It's not your business. Lawson knows-"

"His name is James," Cooper snapped, ignoring the way James was shaking his head and trying to keep the peace. "Your brother and that fat fuck Bearer call him Lawson. You could at least have the fucking courtesy to call him by his actual name."

"Cooper come on, I don't mind," James said. "It's no big deal."

"Yeah, it's not a big deal," Mark added. "So just get your panties out of punch why don't ya?"

"Or why don't you put your dick back in your pants and be faithful to my father?" Cooper countered. Screw the bonding and forced end to this war. The majority of his hatred for Mark came from his treatment of James and until that actually changed, he wasn't about to fucking go along with this. He was a fool for even trying. "Why don't you fucking quit playing games with him if you love him so much?"

"Boy you better-"

"I better what?" Huh? You gonna choke me again? I fucking dare you to do it. But know this-you fucking EVER touch me again or-" he stopped to point at James "if you ever fucking hurt him again…I will fucking get you. You can fucking bank on that." With that he stormed off, ignoring James as he called out after him.


	17. Chapter 17

Since he had gotten a ride to the restaurant from James and Mark, Cooper decided to be an ornery shit and hotwire the vehicle, stealing it from right under his father's nose. Yeah it wasn't something he should have done but he was too annoyed and pissed off to give a shit. He hadn't even wanted to go to this stupid dinner in the first place. He had told James that but had James listened? No. James had insisted on making him go and it had ended not good, just like he knew it would. He didn't know why James had bothered with all this really. What was the point? Nothing was going to change. Mark wouldn't change his ways, Cooper's opinion wasn't going to change…there was just no fucking point.

He drove home as fast as he could, clutching the steering wheel more tightly than he usually did to help keep his hands from shaking. He loved James very very much but he didn't fucking understand how he could keep doing this crap with Mark. It was completely ridiculous. They said the definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result and it certainly fit James to a tee when it came to Mark. And the fact that he couldn't see that drove Cooper absolutely insane.

"Stop it," he muttered under his breath. He took one hand off the wheel and smacked himself upside the head. "Stop it stop it stop it!" He couldn't think about this anymore. It drove him too crazy. He forced himself to push the subject of Mark and James as far out of his mind as he could and focused on going home. He wondered what kind of crap Connor had been pulling while he was gone and how crazy Glenn had been driven this time. Connor was not an easy person to babysit by any means and Glenn didn't exactly have an abundance of patience to begin with. Cooper found himself hoping that Joie had stuck around to help Crispy out, although admittedly his reasons for doing that were a lot more for himself than anything having to do with Glenn.

He pulled into the driveway about five minutes later and turned off the ignition and tossed the keys from hand to hand as he went into the house. "Joie?" he called out, his voice spiked with hopefulness. "JoJo?" He kicked the door shut behind him and went into the kitchen so he could set James's keys where they belonged.

"He's not here."

Cooper turned around and saw Glenn limping towards him from the living room. "Where is he?" he asked. "And what the hell happened to you?"

Glenn shook his head. "He got a call from his mother or something. I don't fucking know but he had to leave. And your brother is a maniac. He-"

"On guard you mangy beast!" Connor came running out from the living room and whacked Glenn right in the knee with a plastic baseball bat.

"OW!" Glenn yelled, hopping up to his good leg only to get that one hit and he came violently crashing to the ground. "God damn it! Cooper get him off before I kill him!"

"Connor stop it," Cooper said half heartedly, already grabbing his own car keys so he could leave and go get Joie back. "How are you going to keep playing with Crispy if you break him?"

"But the point IS to break him!" Connor informed him. "That's the game we're playing! Duh!"

Glenn scowled and rolled out of the way as Connor tried to smash him in the face. "Where is Lawson?" he asked. "Can't he control this…_thing_?"

Cooper's eyes narrowed angrily. Connor was a thing now? Oh hell no. Now he wasn't going to do shit to help out. Connor could have free reign and do whatever he wanted now. "I ditched him and Captain Fucktard. I don't know when they'll be home." He smirked at the look on Glenn's face and then looked at Connor. "Con Man?"

"Yes Coopy?" Connor said brightly.

"Sic him."

"Yay!"

"OWWW!" Glenn howled as he got beat with the plastic bat. "God damn it!"

"Silence you monster!" Connor cackled as Cooper laughed and walked away. "Nobody wants to hear your cries of pain!"

"Amen to that," Cooper said with a nod. He laughed again when he heard Glenn yelp and then he went back out the front door, sliding across the hood of both James's and his own car before getting in the vehicle and taking off. He would have called Joie to tell him he was coming but the last time he had done that, Joie had been caught on the phone with him and that had caused a nasty scene between him and Ira. At least if he showed up and Joie got caught with him, he could be there to stop anything from happening. "Radio radio…give me something to listen to." He began flipping through the stations to try to find some good music. "Come on come on….no I hate country….I hate boy bands…no…no…no…ooh Offspring!" He turned up the volume and nodded along to the sound of The Offspring all the way to Joie's house. Normally if he was going to enter the Rosenberg house, Joie encouraged him to walk or if he drove to park his car down the street and then sneak in through his bedroom window to avoid his parents. But tonight, Cooper didn't want to be sneaky. He was tired of being discreet and keeping a peace with two people that he hated anyway. Ira was an abusive piece of shit and Lenora was no better because all she did was sit back and let it happen. Well no more. Cooper was done with it. He loved Joie too much to let it keep happening. One way or another, this shit was going to end.

He pulled up to the driveway and got out of the car, still whistling under his breath as he went to the front door. If he were anyone else but a Lawson this would have been risky considering how much Ira hated him. But the important thing though was that he WAS a Lawson; and not only was he a homicidal maniac but even at just sixteen he was much bigger and stronger than Ira. He'd take that son of a bitch down faster than he could blink and he would enjoy doing it.

He was just about to reach out and grab the doorknob when he stepped in something wet. Frowning, he looked down to see what it was. Much to his surprise, he had just stepped in a puddle of blood. And this was no small puddle either. This was a nice big puddle that suddenly gave him a horrible feeling in the pit of his stomach. "What the fuck…" He shook his head and grabbed the doorknob, twisting it and becoming surprised by how easily it swung open. That wasn't like Joie's parents at all. They always locked their front door. "Joie?" he called back, trying to ignore the way his stomach was suddenly churning in a way that was making him feel quite queasy. "Joie?" He ventured into the house, the quietness he was walking into making him feel even more uneasy. "Joie?" He didn't even bother closing the door behind him. He just went further into the house and found the place to be completely trashed. "JOIE!" Cooper went forward even faster, going into the living room and seeing that it was even more trashed than the front hallway. "What in the hell-"

"He's gone."

Cooper whirled around and saw that Lenora was sitting in the chair in the corner of the room, cradling a picture of Joie when he was a little boy in her arms. "What happened?" he asked immediately. His first thought was that someone had broken in and had done all this.

Lenora shook her head slowly. "I can't-"

"What happened?" he repeated, his voice getting a much harder edge this time. There was blood on the porch and the house was trashed. This was not the time to be fucking around and not getting answers. "Tell me!"

Lenora swallowed nervously. A couple of tears were going down her face but it looked like she was holding most of them back. "Ira and his friends told me they were going to help get my Joie back," she said in a faint voice. "The clothes and his…other choices weren't my baby. They said they were just going to make it better. Talk some sense into him." Her lower lip began to tremble violently. "But then he came home and he wouldn't _listen_. All he had to do was _listen_ but he wouldn't do it! He wouldn't _listen_! He pretended like he was but then he started yelling about how much he loved _you_ and he wouldn't stop! And Ira got so _angry_…he lost his temper again. They all lost their tempers…it got so out of hand…"

Cooper did his best to swallow down the bile that was rising up in his throat. Internally he was panicking and that showed itself when he literally grabbed Lenora by the throat and literally lifted her up with one hand. She was a tiny woman, literally no more than five foot five and just over a hundred pounds so she was like a doll in his grasp. "Where are they?" he asked, his voice already getting louder because he was getting more and more pissed by the second. "WHERE ARE THEY? WHERE'S JOIE?"

"I don't know!" Lenora choked out, struggling weakly in his grasp. "I don't know!"

Cooper didn't believe her. He didn't fucking believe her for a second. In a fit of rage he lured her into a false sense of security by setting her down on her feet and then he full on punched her in the face. He had never actually really hit a woman before. He had killed some yes but he had never purposefully struck one before tonight. "LIAR!" he screamed, kicking her in the ribs while she was down. This was so totally against everything James had taught him and he didn't even care. Joie was on the line and he wasn't going to waste time by being a nice guy. "WHERE ARE THEY? WHERE DID THEY GO?" He grabbed her by the hair and yanked her back up to her feet. "TELL ME!"

"I don't know!" she cried out, blood trickling out from the corner out of the corner of the mouth from where he had hit her. "I don't know I swear I don't know! They dragged him out of here they didn't tell me where they were going!"

Cooper glared at her, panicking when he realized she wasn't lying to him. "FUCK!" He thrashed her down to the ground violently before bolting back out the front door. The puddle of blood was still there but now that he was actually paying attention, the puddle was a starting point to a smeared, bloody path that made Cooper's heart beat unbelievably hard in his chest. "No," he moaned, shaking his head in denial. "No no no…" He followed the path, stopping when he noticed there was another bigger puddle where Ira's car was usually parked…as well as Joie's bloodstained wig. Cooper picked it up and held it in his trembling hands, just holding it before hugging it against his chest. The bloody smeary trail started up again and he started to follow it, just about throwing up when he realized that there were pieces of _skin_ embedded in the ground. "Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck…" He walked to the end of the driveway and noticed that the trail just went on and on down the street. How did he not notice this before? "Fuck fuck FUCK!" He sprinted back to his car, so frantic to get going that he dropped the keys three times before managing to get the right key into the ignition so he could start off and take off so he could begin following the trail.

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck…" That was all Cooper could really say. He was in a state of sheer panic. If there was blood on the road and Ira's car was gone, that had to mean that Joie had been or was being DRAGGED by the car as it went. That certainly was NOT what Cooper wanted to think about but since that was the only thing that made sense in his mind, it wouldn't fucking leave him alone. "Please be okay JoJo please be okay…"

His frantic state of mind was fucking with his sense of time and it literally felt like he was driving around for forever. The trail just kept going and going and he had to fight the urge to throw up. He didn't hit much traffic which was a good thing because he would have run people off the road without a second thought.

The trail just kept going…and going…and going…at least that was how it seemed to Cooper. He followed it out into the city limits and a bit into the desert, literally feeling like he was fighting off a heart attack. Eventually though, at long last, there was no more blood on the road. He immediately put on the brakes, barely getting the car to a complete stop before putting it in park and getting out of it. The blood stopped on the road and there wasn't any other new trail…Cooper looked around desperately, hyperventilating by the time he saw the figure laying on the ground just a few feet away. "JOIE!" He sprinted off at full speed, dropping down to his knees when he reached his naked, blood covered boyfriend. The blood that just was CAKED on to Joie's skin was the only thing he was wearing and Cooper's heart stopped for a second at the sight of him.

"Oh FUCK! Joie? Baby?" Cooper immediately checked for a pulse. There was one…but it was weak and it already started to get weaker just seconds after he found it. "Oh my god oh fuck oh FUCK!" He shook his head and gathered Joie up in his arms. "Hang on baby PLEASE hang on!" He was crying and didn't even realize it. "It's going to be okay just hang on for me."

"Cooper…I can't see…" Joie's voice was barely above a whisper and he used his last bit of strength to turn his head, revealing that his other eye was literally dangling out of its socket. Cooper yelped in shock and horror but managed to keep his grip on Joie and started carrying him to the car.

"It's going to be okay," Cooper said frantically, walking as fast as he possibly could. He wanted to run but he was afraid of jarring Joie's body and hurting him even worse. "It will it'll be okay."

"Cooper…" Joie's breathing was becoming wheezy. "Love you…"

"Joie…" Cooper stopped in his tracks when he literally felt Joie's last breath leave him. "No no no no." He dropped down to his knees and set Joie back down so he could start performing mouth to mouth on him. "Come on come ON! Come BACK!" He frantically blew air into Joie's lungs, performing the CPR even though he never had done it before in his life. "Come BACK please come BACK! Joie please please please…"

Nothing. Joie didn't even begin to stir. He was really gone. Cooper stared at his now dead boyfriend's beaten and broken body for the longest time…and then he could only scream for nobody to hear.


	18. Chapter 18

Cooper could not remember how long he just stayed there out in the desert, clinging to Joie's lifeless body and bawling his eyes out. The world around him had faded away and time was one of the many things that had no more meaning to it. Joie-HIS Joie-was dead. Dead…murdered…fuck…it felt like he couldn't breathe. It literally felt like something was crushing his lungs and preventing him from being able to take in oxygen properly. He felt faint, his chest was on fire and the rest of his body was just numb. Someone could have hit him right in the face right at that moment and he wouldn't have felt it at all. He wished he felt that way emotionally. With each passing second, the realization just kept sinking deeper and deeper and he wished it wasn't. It was tearing him up more and more as it did so. Joie was dead. Joie was dead. Joie had been murdered. Joie was dead and couldn't ever come back. Joie was dead and he hadn't been able to save him…

At some point he got up and carried Joie's body to his car, placing him in the passenger's seat and buckling him in before getting in the driver's seat and taking off. He was in absolutely no condition to drive really and he couldn't even begin to remember how he got back to Joie's house. All he knew was that he got there and he gave Joie a small kiss before picking him up and carrying him into the house. It was all dark and quiet in there and it almost seemed like nobody was home. Cooper wasn't one to be fooled by that shit though. He took Joie into the living room and set him down on the couch before going on the hunt. He went through the entire house, eventually finding Lenora asleep in her bed.

"Get up!" he snarled, grabbing the sleeping woman by the hair and literally yanking her out of her bed. "Get up get the FUCK up!" He shook her like a rag dog until her eyes opened and she went to scream bloody murder. "No no no! None of that fucking shit!" He slapped his hand over her mouth and glared daggers at her. It was the total cliché of "if looks could kill" but it was for real this time.

Lenora let out a muffled scream as she continued to look at Cooper in sheer terror. Not that he really truly noticed just how scared she was. He was just too far gone. "Come on!" he snarled, literally dragging her out of the room and down the stairs and into the living room. "I want you to see…you gotta see…LOOK AT THAT!" He placed her right in front of Joie's and forced her to look right at it, even when she tried so hard to turn her head away. "Look you fucking bitch! Look what you let happen!" _What I let happen…_ "That is your son! Your SON! And you-no no no!" He tightened his grip on her and turned her back around to face him. "You fucking let them do that to your son!" He shook her so hard her teeth rattled. "Your FUCKING SON WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

Lenora opened her mouth but all that came out was a terrified squeak. Enraged by that answer, Cooper slapped her across the face, immediately leaving a red handprint behind. In his normal state of mind that wasn't something he would ever do. He had killed his share of women sure, but James had damn well taught him to never just go out of his way and abuse them…that shit wasn't right. But at this point in time, Cooper didn't care. Joie was gone and she was one of the people responsible for it. That meant she had to pay. "Answer me," he growled as he shook her again. "Fucking just answer me!"

"I-I-I-" Lenora was so terrified that she couldn't even begin to speak properly.

"He loved you," Cooper informed her, barely able to keep himself from just beating her to death right then. "He loved both of you. And all you fucking did was hurt him." He hit her again, letting her fall to the floor this time before grabbing a handful of her hair. "I want to know why." He twisted the handful of hair roughly, making her scream out in pain. "I want to know why and I want to know it right the fuck now."

"I'm sorry," she finally managed to say. She was crying so hard that it was hard to understand everything she was saying. "I'm sorry! I'm-" BOOM! She got hit again before being turned back around to face Joie's body.

"Sorry?" Cooper chuckled, his voice raspy and deranged. "You're sorry. LOOK AT HIM! Does it fucking look like sorry is going to do anything?" He waited until she shook her head. "That's right…you got something right for once you stupid bitch." He petted her face with the back of his hand, ignoring the way she flinched at his touch. "You can help make it right though. You wanna know how?"

She nodded.

"Tell me where Ira and his friends are. I know you know where they are…so why don't you save yourself a bunch of pain and tell me where they are and how many of them there were…believe me, you'll be saving yourself a whole bunch of pain and torment if you do."

Lenora swallowed hard and just cried for about a minute, until Cooper smacked her on the back of the head and reminded her that he was not going to just fucking wait forever. "There…there was Ira…Anthony…Robert…Eugene and Scott. I think they went to Scott's house on East Washington Ave. You can't miss it, he's got like six cars in his front yard…" She sniffled loudly and looked at Cooper hopefully. She was obviously thinking that since she finally cooperated with him that he was going to just go away and leave her alone. But she was wrong…she was so fucking wrong.

He took a quick glance at Joie's body before taking out his knife and driving it into her chest Her eyes widened and she stared up at him in shock. He stared back at her passively, twisting the blade even deeper and just watching her as she died right in front of him. Once the life had left her eyes he yanked the knife back out and let her body drop to the floor. "Come on JoJo," he said as he put the knife back into his pocket and carefully picked Joie up into a wedding carry. "We've got more work to do."

…

"Where do you think he is?" James asked worriedly as he stared out the window. He had gotten home awhile ago after having to catch a cab home since Cooper had taken it upon himself to steal the car the two of them and Mark had gone to the restaurant in but once he had gotten there, Cooper was once again long gone. He had tried to call him several times now, just trying to see where the hell he was. He hadn't gotten an answer and had figured Cooper was mad at him and just not wanting to talk to him. So for awhile he had just decided to back off and let Cooper cool down…but now worry was starting to settle in. He was trying not to let it because it wasn't like Cooper hadn't stormed off before. He had done it plenty of times and had always just been just fine. But still, for some reason, something was different this time. James could feel it in his gut. Something was different and it wasn't a good kind of different. It was a very very bad kind.

"Who?" Mark asked as he flipped through the channels on the television. They were in the bedroom, him naked underneath the sheets he was covered up in and James clad only in his boxers because he had gotten up to sit at the window.

"Who do you think?" James countered, a little annoyed that Mark was not taking any interest in what was bothering him.

Mark rolled his eyes, realizing he was still worried about Cooper. "He's fine Lawson."

"You don't know that."

"It's Cooper. How many times has he done this now? He storms off, has his hissy fit and then comes home within like a day." Mark saw that James was still worried and he shook his head. "He's probably with that damn tranny of his, you're worrying about nothing."

"That "tranny" has a name," James reminded him. "Joie. His name is Joie."

"Whatever," Mark said with a wave of his hand. "Look, those two are probably off fucking like bunnies and are aren't even paying attention to how many times you're calling. Just leave them alone and come back to bed. It's pretty much a guarantee that they'll be over here by tomorrow afternoon."

"I hope so," James muttered as he finally went back to bed. The uneasy feeling wasn't going away but he was just trying harder to push it down. Mark was probably right. Cooper would be back (more than likely with Joie) and everything would be fine. He just was being paranoid, that was all.

…

Lenora turned out to be right; Scott's house was impossible to miss. Not only did his house have all the cars in the front yard but it was also the crappiest looking one on the block. It really didn't even look fit to live in but that fact wasn't going to matter soon enough. Not for Scott anyway.

"You stay here JoJo, okay?" Cooper said as he smoothed down Joie's hair. Rigor mortis was setting in and that combined with the situation he was about to walk into pretty much gave him no choice but to just leave Joie in the car for this. It would just be easier overall if he did so. "I'll be back real soon I promise." He leaned over and kissed Joie's icy bloody cheek, tears escaping his eyes even though he tried to quickly squeeze them shut. "I love you…" He didn't get an answer of course and it killed him. "I love you and I'll be back soon, okay?" He kissed Joie's cheek again. "I'll be back and we can go home. We'll go home…" He stared at Joie for the longest time before forcing himself to get out of the car. He went around to the back of the vehicle and opened the trunk so he could get his tire iron out of it. There were still tears streaming down his face but he wiped them away and did his best to focus. He had to fucking keep a hold of himself. He had to do it because he had to make those mother fuckers inside pay.

They all had to fucking pay.

…

"How many beers am I grabbing?" Scott asked as he went up the basement stairs. There was a poker game going on at the moment and he hadn't been looking to get up from it but they needed more booze and it was his turn to grab it.

"Everything you've got," Anthony slurred out. "Grab it all and get your redneck ass back down here so we can keep playing."

"Fuck you, I ain't a redneck you fat fuck!" Scott flipped the others off as they laughed before making his way up the rest of the stairs and into the kitchen. He went straight to the fridge, gathering up all the beer he could hold. He was so drunk to start with and so focused on getting more beer that he didn't hear the creak of the floor behind him. If he would have, he probably would have realized there was somebody behind him. But since he didn't, he had no idea just what was waiting for him-until he received the first blow directly to the back of his skull.

…

Cooper grabbed a hold of Scott's shoulder before he could hit the fridge and thrashed him down backwards to the floor. He knew these friends of Ira alright. He had seen them around, all of them giving Joie a hard time just because he was different…"fruity little fag" was their favorite term for him. "Hello mother fucker," he snarled, raising the tire iron again and cracking Scott in the face with it. "Remember me?" He didn't give the guy a chance to answer. He just kept bringing his weapon down over and over again, bashing his face and skull in with an angry zeal that could only be rivaled by other Lawsons. Over and over and over…he didn't stop until long after Scott's face was a broken mess of blood and his skull was quite literally caved in. Once he was done he stared at his handy work, panting for breath and letting the blood drip off the end of the tire iron and on to the floor.

"Fucker," he growled, finally forcing himself to look away from the mess he had made so he could look towards the basement door. He could hear someone coming up the stairs and he decided to forego the tire iron this time, instead taking his still bloodied knife out of his pocket and also taking off his belt so he could use that as well.

"What the fuck is taking so long Scott?" Anthony asked as he opened the basement door. "Did you-" His eyes landed on Cooper and Scott's lifeless body and he went to yell when Cooper kicked him between the legs, effectively silencing him for the moment.

"Come on you fat bastard," Cooper growled, wrapping his belt around Anthony's neck and dragging him off, ducking into the nearest bedroom (which was actually Scott's). "You fucking helped Ira out tonight didn't you? You fucking helped kill my Joie…" He wasn't looking for any kind of verbal response. He just tightened the belt and bent him backwards as much as he could, holding him in place as he drove his knife into the guy's stomach and ripped it upwards. The blade sliced right through his flesh and split him right open enough to allow Cooper to literally stick his hand inside of him and rip out a good chunk of his internal organs.

_Gross…_

"What the hell is going on?" Ira yelled loudly. He, Eugene and Robert were out of the basement and they had stumbled upon Scott's body. "Who the fuck did this? Grab the fucking phone and call-"

"The cops?" Cooper had abandoned the bedroom the moment Ira started yelling and he was standing at the kitchen doorway, his knife in his hands and a deranged sneer on his face. "Cops can't save you Ira…nobody's going to save you."

"You fucking…you…" Ira was both drunk and shocked so his sentence forming was not quite what it usually was. That was just fine with Cooper though. It allowed him to not be distracted by useless talking as he drove into Robert, intentionally missing most of his major internal organs before ripping the knife out and giving Eugene a knockout punch as he approached him. Ira stumbled back and tried to run but Cooper caught him so easily it was like he had just stayed still in the first place.

"No no no," Cooper cooed, grabbing Ira by the back of his head and slammed his forehead into the wall, knocking him silly. "You're not going ANYWHERE…well not YET anyway." He pulled Ira back away from the wall and drove the knife into his groin, which got him quite the interesting sounding yell. "Oooh…that had to hurt." He yanked his knife back out and thrashed Ira to the ground. "Stay there!" He kicked the older man in the ribs for good measure. "I've got something REAL special plan for you…"

Ira only groaned in response and Cooper just let him lie there, focusing more on Robert and Eugene. He took two of the chairs from the kitchen and set them up back to back before placing the two men in them and tying them up with some rope he found in one of the drawers. Once they were nice and tied up he kicked Ira again and then dragged Anthony out of the bedroom, setting him on top of Scott. "Perfect…" He went to the garage and looked around, finding himself a nice canister of gas station. "Jackpot." He took it back into the house and doused not only the bodies but the two others that were still alive, laughing at the way they tried to fight their way out of their restraints. If this was any other night he would have thought of something cool or witty to say about all this but tonight he had nothing. He had nothing because he felt nothing; even when he laughed it was just empty filler because he didn't know what else to do. Once they were all doused with the gasoline he took his book of matches out of his pocket and lit one, dropping it down on them and quickly backing away as they shot up in flames. He watched the fire burn for a couple of minutes, not getting any real joy out of the anguished screams he was hearing from Robert and Eugene.

"Fuck this," he growled. He picked up Ira and slung him over his shoulder. "We gotta go." He could feel Ira trying to fight him and he just shook his head, not about to let that fucker get away. He had something nice and special planned for this bastard.

…

Joie's body continued to sit in the front seat of Cooper's car, not seeing or hearing anything going on around him. He didn't see the group of kids walk by from across the street, glancing at the car but not seeing him in it or they would have screamed in horror. He didn't see the dog that ran by and sniffed the tire before running back off to his owner. He didn't see Cooper come back into the car and he didn't feel the kiss to his cheek or hear the soft "I love you" from Cooper's lips. And he certainly did not know that they were going back out to the desert-with his dad being dragged from the back of the car.

…

Cooper drove around for as long as he possibly could, twisting and turning on the desert roads so Ira's blood coated as much as it possibly could. He almost wrecked at least a dozen times he was driving so recklessly and the only reason he saved himself from certain disaster was because he had Joie's body with him. Joie had been through enough as it was; he didn't need to be in a car wreck on top of it.

When driving finally got boring, Cooper pulled over to the side of the road and got out of the car. "Hey mother fucker," he growled, kicking Ira as he laid there half dead. "How are you feeling?" He kicked Ira again when he didn't get an answer. "Huh? You feel like a big man now?" He stomped on Ira's stabbed groin, finally getting a low pained scream out of the older man. "You couldn't fucking leave him alone could you? You just couldn't fucking quit!" He sat down and straddled Ira, punching him in the face with as much force as he had in him. "He was your son…HE WAS YOUR FUCKING SON!" He got back up and untied Ira from the back of the car so he could drag him over to the passenger's side window. "You see him? You see him in there? He loved you…he defended you despite what you put him through. And what did you do to repay that? WHAT DID YOU FUCKING DO?" He thrashed Ira to the ground and began kicking him wildly. "You fucking killed him! You and your fucking friends…fucking fucking FUCKING KILLED HIM!" The rage completely overtook him and the last thing he remembered before he blacked out from it was getting down on the ground beside Ira and hitting him over and over and over again…

…

Connor woke up the next morning to Spot licking his face, which made him laugh loudly. "Spot! You dumb butt!" He sat up and rubbed his eyes before hugging the dog's head. "You're so silly!" He kissed the dog affectionately. "Did Cooper let you in here?"

Spot just wagged his tail and Connor decided to get up and go see if Cooper was home for himself. "Coopy?" he called out. He ran across the hallway and barged right in without even knocking. "Coopy?" Not only was there no Coopy, but his bed had obviously not been slept in. "Coopy?" Connor frowned and went over to the window, a smile coming across his face when he saw Cooper's car in the driveway. He must have just gotten home. "Coopy!" He ran out of the room, heading downstairs and expecting Cooper to be down there. "Cooper? Joie?" He looked all around and didn't find either of them. That confused him and he searched once more just to be sure they weren't hiding anywhere.

"This isn't funny," he pouted when he once again didn't find either one of them. "I'm telling Daddy on them." He went to march upstairs to do just that when he suddenly thought maybe Cooper and Joie were making out in the car again. "Coopy! Joie!" He ran out of the house and to the car. "You're in there aren't you? You can't keep hiding from me, I know all your-" He opened the car door and stopped in mid-sentence when he saw his brother just sitting in there, cradling Joie in his arms. "COOPY! What happened to Joie?"

Cooper didn't answer. He just sat there, holding Joie and staring at nothing.

"Joie!" Connor got impatient with Cooper's lack of answer and got into the car so he could be all over Joie himself. "Joie wake up! Wake up Joie! What happened to you?" He shook Joie, trying to get him to wake up. Joie didn't even begin to stir though. His cold body just stayed in Cooper's arms and Connor freaked, letting out a piercing shriek as he scrambled out of the car and ran to the only person he had left to turn to.

"DADDY! DADDY DADDY HELP HELP HELP!"


	19. Chapter 19

James had been fast asleep until Connor's piercing scream for him made him just about fall out of bed. "What the fuck?" he muttered as he sat up and opened his eyes. It was a little after ten in the morning, which made him groan loudly. Getting up before noon had not been on his agenda.

"Ugh…" Connor's yelling had woken up Mark too. "You need to talk to that boy about that yelling shit when we're trying to sleep."

"I already have." James rubbed his eyes as he listened to Connor's approaching footsteps. "Several times. It don't ever do any good." Listening was not something Connor really ever did. It had been an issue with him for years now and there really seemed to be nothing they could do about it.

"Daddy Daddy Daddy!" Connor came barreling into the room, his eyes wide and panicked. "Daddy!"

"What is it?" James frowned, not liking the look that was on his youngest son's face. "What's wrong?"

"Joie won't wake up!" Connor grabbed James's hand and started trying to pull him out of bed. "He won't wake up Daddy! Coopy's got him in the car and his face is all messed up and he won't wake up!"

James exchanged a quick look at Mark before quickly snagging his boxers and slipping them on before getting out of bed and running out of the room as fast as he could. He jumped over Spot before grabbing on to the railing and launching himself up and over it since he figured that was faster than actually taking the stairs. Then he went out the front door, going straight to Cooper's car and opening the passenger's door. What he found inside the car made his jaw drop. Cooper was sitting in the driver's seat, cradling Joie in his arms, who was obviously dead. "…Cooper?"

Cooper didn't even act like he had heard him at all. He just sat there, staring blankly off into space while holding on to Joie for dear life.

"Cooper?" James tried again, making sure his voice was louder this time. "Cooper what happened?"

Cooper still gave no response. James sighed and got the rest of the way into the car so he could start to try to look Joie over. Someone had done a horrible number on him and it made James's stomach twist in a huge knot. "Cooper what happened?" He leaned over and tried to touch Joie to see if he could tell just how long he had been dead but Cooper jerked away and shook his head. "Cooper please, what happened?" James was getting more and more freaked out by the second.

"They killed him," Cooper said softly. His voice was not even above a whisper and James had to strain really hard to even hear him.

"They killed him? Who killed them? Cooper who did this?"

Cooper shook his head. "They're dead. I got them. I got them all." He shook his head and sniffled loudly. "It didn't fucking help…" His lower lip started to quiver and he shook his head again. "He…he was already…" The rest of the sentence went unfinished as he buried his face against the crook of Joie's neck and sobbed loudly.

If James's heart hadn't been broke already that did it for him. He knew Cooper's feelings for Joie; they had been obvious even before Cooper had realized it himself. And he himself had cared about Joie immensely. Joie had been as much of a part of the family as any of them and now he was gone. James didn't even want to think about what had happened to him before he died. The condition of his body indicated just how bad it was and that was more than enough.

James just let Cooper cry for quite awhile, feeling it was best for him to not be interrupted. When the sobs began to subside out of him just being too tired to let any more out, he tried to carefully pry Joie out of his arms. "Can I-"

"No!" Cooper shook his head and held on to Joie even more tightly.

"Cooper please-"

"No! You can't…no!" Cooper smacked James's hands as hard as he could. "Stop it go away! Fucking don't touch him!"

"Okay okay!" James held up his hands in surrender. "I'm not touching. But maybe we should bring him inside."

Cooper mumbled something under his breath that James didn't understand at all and then went quiet. He stared off into space, absently cradling Joie in his arms. James just sat there for awhile, trying to figure out how to really even approach this situation. He was trying to remember how the hell he was pried away from Annabelle after she died but he couldn't. That was still a huge blur for him and he didn't have time to try to force himself to remember. "Cooper-" He stopped when he caught Mark coming out of the house to investigate just what the hell was going on. _Oh crap._ James quickly got out of the car to intercept Mark. "Mark no-"

"What the hell is going on Lawson?" Mark didn't sound particularly concerned. He was obviously just curious because he had gotten woken up over this. "Connor's in there going nuts about the Joe kid-"

"Joie," James corrected automatically. "And Mark please, go in the house before Cooper sees you-"

"He already did." Mark nodded to the car and James looked back to see Cooper staring blankly at the both of them. "Little too late for that." He shoved his hands into his pocket. "Now what the hell is going on?"

James sighed. "Joie's dead."

Mark's eyebrows shot up at the response. "Really? What the fuck happened?"

"I don't know. He's just…I don't fucking know." James shook his head and ran his hand through his hair. He felt numb and it was making it really hard for him to think.

Mark took a step towards the car. "So what is the boy doing in there? Just sitting in there with the body?"

"Pretty much. He can barely even speak-Mark don't." James grabbed Mark by the wrist to keep him from going any closer. "Please don't, I'm begging you not to do it."

"I'm not going to do anything," Mark claimed. "I just want to see-"

"No!" That came out pretty harsh and James winced at the irritated look that crossed Mark's face. "Mark please, you might just make him more upset. Just go in the house and take care of Connor while I deal with this. Please? Please Mark I'm fucking begging here."

Mark sighed. "Fine."

"Thank you." James would have given him a kiss but Mark had slipped out of his grasp and was back in the house before it could be done. That would have irked him under normal circumstances but the numbness that had taken him over just made him ignore that little slight and walk back to the car, stopping and putting a hand over his mouth as he caught sight of Cooper seemingly talking to Joie through the window. _Oh boy…_

…

Four hours later and James found himself finally leading the Joie carrying Cooper into the house. For what had felt like forever he had been convinced he was never going to get Cooper out of the car. He hadn't gotten any more about what had happened out of him and anything else he said just seemed to not be heard at all. It was freaking him the hell out because he had never seen Cooper like this before and he didn't know if he was handling this well at all. He had gotten Cooper out of the car sure but that was nothing really. Cooper was still clinging to Joie for dear life and he still wasn't talking or even acting like anyone else really existed. It was tearing James up but he was trying not to let it show. He had to maintain the composure here.

"Coopy?" Connor came running as soon as he heard them come in. His eyes were all red and puffy and James immediately tried to shield him from seeing Joie again. "Coopy what happened to Joie?" He started trying to get around James and James had to continuously step in his way to stop him. "Daddy what happened?"

"Connor not now," James pleaded. He was looking around for Mark, who was nowhere to be seen. "Go play with Mark-"

"I don't want to play with Mark!" Connor stomped his foot and balled up his fists. "He's mean and cranky and I don't want him! I want to know what happened to Joie!" He tried to get around James once more so James grabbed him to carry him away. That turned out to be a big mistake because Connor took advantage of the opportunity and bit him. James yelped in pain and Connor wiggled out of his grasp so he could go right up to Cooper and start tugging on his shirt.

"Coopy what happened to Joie? Mark says he's dead that's not true right? That can't be true Joie's not dead. Mark's lying isn't he?" When Cooper didn't rush to assure him Mark was a mean liar he started to tug the hell out of Cooper's shirt. "Coopy stop it! You and Joie stop right now this isn't funny!"

"Connor!" James snagged Connor by the waist and picked him up. "Stop that please!"

"But Daddy tell him no!" Connor was trying to bite him again so he could be free once more. "Daddy tell him no tell him!"

James shook his head helplessly. "Mark!" Where the hell was he? "MARK!"

"I'm comin' I'm comin'!" Mark came thundering in with the phone pressed up against his ear.

"Who the hell are you talking to?" James asked.

"Bearer," Mark replied curtly. "Here, give me him and-"

"NOO!" Connor started kicking at Mark wildly. "No no no no! Daddy no! I wanna stay here I wanna-"

A loud thud cut him off and the three of them looked over to see that Cooper had laid Joie down on the steps and was now punching the wall as hard as he possibly could. "Cooper don't!" James quickly rushed over and grabbed the younger man into a bear hug. "Cooper please-"

"Let go of me!" Cooper was kicking his feet wildly, nailing James so hard in the shins he was going to have bruises for quite a long time. "Let me go let me go LET ME GO!"

James winced and tightened his grip on Cooper, managing to keep a hold of him as he continued the fight. It didn't last much longer at all. Cooper was exhausted, both physically and emotionally and ended up just slumping over completely, an incoherent crying mess. James wanted to say something, anything to just try to make this better but he couldn't. There was absolutely nothing that could be said anyway. No words would ever fix this and if there were words to say, he sure as hell didn't know them. So quiet he stayed and let Cooper sob into his shirt and trying to ignore the way Joie's dangling eye was seemingly staring at them.

…

Cooper didn't speak a single word for the next two days after he was done crying. He just shut down, staring right through anyone who tried to address him. Lenora's death was on the news and Ira's body had obviously yet to be found because the police were looking for both him and Joie. The cops did come to the Lawson household to ask them if they had seen Joie because several people had told them that Joie was friends with Cooper. James and Mark both denied seeing him and with both Cooper and Connor hidden upstairs, they lied and said the boys were in Canada visiting their uncle and hadn't been around for two weeks. As soon as James had heard about Lenora and Ira he knew what Cooper had done and was ready to spin an entire web of lies to help protect him. Luckily though, the cops bought the story they were fed and didn't say anymore about it.

Joie was laid to rest in a little secluded park that was right by the cemetery. Julie secretly had a casket and a tombstone delivered to the house and they had themselves a small funeral ceremony. Cooper's stomach was a giant twisted knot during the thing but he knew Joie deserved some kind of sendoff so he had forced himself not be a selfish baby about it. He had forced himself to go numb and try not to think about the whole thing but later that night, when he had locked himself up in his room, the reality hit him in full force. They had just put his boyfriend-the love of his fucking life-in the ground. They buried him in the ground to just decay away in a box. That just kept repeating itself in Cooper's brain over and over again. It felt wrong on so many levels. Joie couldn't just be in the ground. That wasn't right how could he do that? How could he put them there to rot and then be expected to just go on with his life? That just wasn't possible. Just getting through every second felt impossible. Joie was gone, his murderous rampage really had not only not brought him back but hadn't made him feel better at all…every second was pure agony.

"_You're always so negative," Joie informed him as he kicked his feet around lazily. He was laying on the floor coloring in one of Connor's coloring books while Cooper was up on the couch, trying to watch TV. _

_Cooper frowned and pouted his lips at the accusation. "Negative? I'm not always negative."_

"_Yes you are," Joie insisted. "You're just a negative Nancy that I don't know what to do with."_

_Cooper rolled his eyes. Joie was just being overdramatic now. "I'm a realist, not a negative Nancy. You're just too optimistic."_

"_Well excuse me for liking to look on the bright side of things." Joie sat up and put the crayons and coloring book aside. "You need to smile more. You don't smile enough."_

"_I don't like to smile."_

"_You would if you did it more."_

"_Nope I wouldn't. I'll never like it not ever ever."_

_Joie huffed in irritation, which made Cooper smirk. He was trying to get under his skin and it seemed to be working pretty well. "You want to bet on that?" He crawled over to him and before Cooper knew what was happening he was being pinned down and tickled mercilessly._

"_Hey! Stop that! That's cheating!"_

"_Nope!" Joie dug his fingers deeper into Cooper's ribs, making him squirm and howl with laughter. _

Cooper squeezed his eyes shut and buried his face into his pillow as the tears started once more. He had cried so much already that he felt like he shouldn't have anymore tears left. Yet still he cried on, drenching his pillow before forcing himself to get up and go sit by the window. He wasn't even going to try to sleep. As tired as he was, he knew that if he went to sleep he would dream about Joie. And he couldn't handle that. He was already thinking about him constantly while awake but at least if he stayed up he could force himself out of the memories that tried to consume him at every opportunity. Asleep though, he would be defenseless, unable to stop the onslaught he knew would come his way. _So up I'll stay…fuck me, God, if you exist and you're actually listening, just kill me now. Please please PLEASE kill me now and get it over with._


	20. Chapter 20

The days not only dragged on and on but they were all blurring together on top of it. Cooper stayed up in his room as much as he possibly could; the only time he really left was to go to the bathroom. He refused food, sleep, company…he kept the shades drawn on the window and he stayed mostly curled up in the fetal position on the bed, either crying or staring blankly at the wall. Every breath he took was just a huge chore. This was hell. It was just hell. Anyone who said time healed wounds didn't know what the fuck they were talking about. Every moment was just as bad, if not worse than the one before it. And there was no way out of it. He was too weak to break himself out of this low and it certainly didn't help that he didn't see the point in doing so. What was life without Joie? Nothing he was interested in, that was for sure.

"Cooper?" James was pounding on the door again. He had been doing that over and over again, somehow convinced he could get a different outcome if he kept at it. "Cooper please…" The door was locked but a swift kick to it made it fly open with a loud bang. Cooper didn't even flinch though. He just stared apathetically at James, wishing he would just go the fuck away.

"Cooper come on, you need to eat something." James turned on the lights and winced at the sight of Cooper there on the bed. He looked like absolute hell. His face was pale and his eyes had huge purple bags under them from his lack of sleep.

"No," Cooper grumbled. "Not hungry."

"I didn't ask if you were hungry," James reminded him. "I said you _need_ to eat something. Now please get up." He understood what Cooper was going through but he couldn't let him starve himself. He knew for a fact that truly did nothing to help the situation.

"Fuck off," Cooper mumbled. "I'm not hungry.

"Cooper…I'm not asking anymore." James easily scooped the younger man into his arms and carried him out of the room. At first Cooper was surprised he actually did that but that wore off pretty quickly. He tried to fight his way free for about three seconds but then just went limp. He had no real energy to keep that up and besides, just because James was lugging him around didn't mean he had to eat. If he thought it did he had another thing coming.

"Daddy Daddy what-Coopy!" Connor jumped up and down at the bottom of the stairs and clapped his hands. He had been wanting to go into Cooper's room and try to make him feel better but nobody would let him do it. He felt that they were being horribly horribly mean to him and had been making that fact known through enough fits to drive absolutely everyone up the wall. "Coopy Coopy hi hi hi!" He started trying to climb up James so he could get up to Cooper. "Hi hi hi! Coopy are you okay? You look like shit. Do you wanna hug Coopy? Do you want one?"

"Connor please," James pleaded, carrying both Cooper and Connor into the kitchen now. Connor hanging on his arm like a monkey didn't really faze him too much since he was not only strong enough to lug his sons around but Connor was a total toothpick but his endless amount of questions were really just a little too much. "Don't bombard him."

Connor made a face. "I'm not bombing him!"

"Bombard Connor, I said-"

"You're just meanie trying to keep him away from me!" Connor was starting on this again. How wonderful. "You're MEAN Daddy you're really MEAN!"

"Connor-"

"Mean mean mean mean-"

James sighed loudly and set Cooper down at the kitchen table. Connor immediately climbed on to Cooper's lap, clinging to him for dear life while sticking his tongue out at James. James ignored him and grabbed the bowl of soup that was sitting on the middle of the table. Cooper tried to just get up and go but James pushed him back down by his shoulder. "Here. Just eat a little."

Cooper kept his mouth firmly closed. He did not want to eat and he definitely did not want Connor clinging to him like a baby.

"Cooper please." James actually tried to feed Cooper himself but still the mouth stayed shut. "You don't eat this I'm taking you to the hospital and having them stick an IV in your arm."

"You wouldn't," Cooper said in disbelief.

"Watch me," James replied. He really was not fucking around and Cooper finally (albeit very reluctantly) took the spoon and started forcing the soup down his throat. He wasn't a huge soup fan to begin with but now it tasted even worse than ever to him. His stomach twisted into a tighter and tighter knot with each spoonful and he didn't even get halfway done before he shoved the bowl away. "Done."

James looked back and forth between Cooper and the bowl, debating on whether to just accept that little bit of progress or try to get him a little bit more. Connor didn't even try to have that debate. He grabbed the bowl and tried to feed Cooper himself. The moment he touched the spoon to Cooper's lips, Cooper just snapped. He smacked the spoon out of Connor's hands hard and then literally threw the bowl at the wall. The bowl was plastic (James avoided glass dishes if he could since Connor broke shit all the time) so that was fine but soup went everywhere.

"Coopy!" Connor's eyes just about bugged right out of his head. "Why did you do THAT Coopy?"

Cooper didn't answer. Instead he pushed Connor off of him and started trying to head back to his room. But before he could even exit the kitchen the sound of crying caught his attention. The crying was all too familiar and it made his heart freeze up inside of his chest. He shook his head in denial and tried to will himself just to keep going. He wasn't hearing what he was hearing because it wasn't possible. Despite his brain's desperate messages of that, his feet forced his body to turn back around. Connor and James were gone and there was Joie there underneath the table, his broken and beaten body staining the floor with blood.

"Why didn't you save me Cooper?" he asked. He started dragging himself out from under the table and going towards Cooper. "Where were you? They hurt me and I needed you and you weren't there. Didn't you love me Cooper? Didn't you love me like you said."

Cooper couldn't even speak. His throat had constricted completely and he couldn't even back away. Where would he go anyway? There was nowhere to hide from this truth. He had let Joie die. He should have killed Ira a fuck of a lot sooner because that would have saved him. That would have saved him and they would still be together. Or at the very least, it should have been him. It should have been him that died and now rotting deep inside the ground…

"Jesus Christ on a cross! COOPER!"

Cooper screamed and struggled violently to get out of James's arms as reality came crashing back down around him. He was slumped down in James's arms and Connor was nearby, looking scared to death at him. Joie wasn't there and Cooper started looking around wildly for him. "Joie? JOIE!"

James shook his head. "Joie's not here-"

"YES HE WAS!"

"Maybe Coopy saw a ghost," Connor suggested innocently.

"HE WAS NOT A FUCKING GHOST! HE WAS RIGHT FUCKING THERE HE WAS RIGHT FUCKING THERE!" Cooper's voice cracked he was yelling so loud.

"Okay okay!" James looked extremely worried but he was trying to hide that and just say anything that would appease Cooper. "I believe you-"

"No you don't. Fucking liar." Cooper shook his head and tried to get away from James. "Fucking let go."

"Cooper _please_-"

"Fucking let go what the FUCK do you care?" Cooper wrenched himself out of James's grasp and turned around to face him. There was no more rational part of his brain left. That had been shut down from exhaustion. There was just the grief and anger now, a horrible, uncontrollable anger that was looking to unleash a huge dose of venom on the person trying to take care of him. "It's YOUR fucking fault! Joie fucking needed me and where was I? With you and that ASSHOLE you fucking INSIST on dating! I told you I didn't want to be there and YOU MADE ME GO! You made me fucking go!" His hand shot out and belted James across the face. "What the FUCK is wrong with you? You KNOW I hate him and you KNOW he hates me! Nothing changed that that night except for JOIE FUCKING DYING!" He hit James again and then stormed away, going upstairs to his room and slamming the door shut so hard the windows rattled.

…

Eight hours late Cooper was passed out from exhaustion and Connor was inside watching The Lion King while James smoked his way through a carton of cigarettes. He had also invaded Mark's whiskey supply, although thankfully, he wasn't the mean drunk that the other man turned into when he started in on this stuff. Normally he only drank when he was out looking to party. He HATED self medicating with the bottle but tonight he couldn't help himself. The shit Cooper said to him was fucking with his head big time. At first he tried to tell himself he didn't mean it and that it wasn't true. But then he realized that even if Cooper truly didn't mean it, it didn't make it any less true. The fact of the matter was, if he hadn't dragged Cooper to dinner with him and Mark that night, Cooper would have been with Joie and this whole mess would have most likely been prevented.

He flicked the butt of his current cigarette away and started on another one. He had lost track of how many he had gone through. None of it was making him feel better but there was not much he could do. He couldn't go hunting because he didn't want to go too far away in case Cooper had another fit or something like he did earlier. He had absolutely NO idea what that shit in the kitchen had been about earlier but he knew he didn't want it happening again. So home he stayed, attempting to get some air and brood before he went back inside and tried to keep things together.

He downed more of the whiskey, knowing Mark would be pissed when he found out he drank all of this. It was hard to even care. James knew there was no way that Mark could even begin to deal with all of this if he was the one that had to do it, so he didn't want to hear a word out of him about anything related to it. Emotional stuff had never been Mark's strong area; a lot of the time he acted like he didn't even have feelings. It drove James up the wall but what could he do? Mark wasn't rushing to change and right now he had a lot bigger things to worry about.

"Daddy?"

James looked back and saw Connor standing there. "Hey buddy." He put the cigarette out and motioned for Connor to come sit on his lap, which he did. "You okay?"

Connor shook his head.

"What's the matter?"

"Daddy, is Coopy ever going to get better?"

"I'm sure he will." James wasn't even sure about that but he couldn't tell Connor that. He wanted Connor to feel better. "It's just going to take more time."

"Longer than you being sad about Mommy?"

"…I hope not." James kissed the side of Connor's head. "You wanna go in and see if we have any leftover pizza?" Connor nodded. "Okay." James stood up and carried Connor back into the house, just leaving his stuff out there. He would bring it in later.

…

Cooper woke up to Spot licking his face. He let out a long sigh and patted the dog on the head. "Hey buddy." He let Spot lick him a little bit more before forcing himself up to his feet. He didn't know how long he had been out for. He just knew that he felt far, far from rested. He stumbled from his room to the bathroom, locking the door behind him. He stripped off his clothes and got into the shower, turning on the water as hot as he could stand it. Then he just stood in there, shivering despite the heat and steam that was choking him. There was no single coherent thought going through his mind. There was just the pain. The all consuming pain that he couldn't stand anymore. He needed some sort of relief. He blindly reached out and grabbed the razor that was near him, gripping it so tightly his fingers started to hurt. He pressed the blade of it against his arm and started digging it in, letting the blood drip down to the floor, mixing with the water and swirling right down the drain.

And the pain-while not gone-started to be relieved.


	21. Chapter 21

Cooper laid there on his bed, staring up at the ceiling as he picked at the sleeves on his jacket. It was over a hundred degrees outside, he had no business even wearing one of those but he had to. He had to hide the cuts he had been making on his arms. If James saw them he would freak big time. Sure he had been keeping himself nice and locked up in his room but it was really only a matter of time before James came bursting in again, telling him he need to eat or something. He couldn't' even remember the last time he ate. He couldn't bring himself to do it unless physically made to, and even then he only did it kicking and screaming.

"_You know, we should probably get up sometime soon," Joie said as he and Cooper laid in bed together. Joie had his head resting on Cooper's chest while Cooper had his arms tightly coiled Joie's body. It was nearly two in the afternoon but besides one quick trip to the bathroom after first waking up they hadn't left the bed at all. Joie had said they should but they hadn't done it yet._

"_Why?" Cooper nuzzled his face against Joie's hair. "We're so comfy here."_

"_Aren't you hungry?"_

"…_No." Just as he said that his stomach started to growl loudly._

_Joie giggled and looked up at Cooper with a big smile on his face. "Me thinks you're lying."_

"_You do?" Cooper smirked as Joie nodded. "Nah. I never lie. I just improve the truth a little sometimes, that's all."_

Cooper groaned and smacked himself upside the head even though he knew it wouldn't do much good. He couldn't control these flashbacks. Everywhere he looked there were reminders of Joie. He couldn't escape them and as miserable as they made him, he couldn't bear to get rid of them. Doing that meant accepting he was really gone and he couldn't do that. He couldn't let Joie go. There was no life without Joie. No life at fucking all.

"_WAAAHHH!" Joie screamed at the top of his lungs as he ran from Connor, who was chasing him with the hose. James's attempt at washing his car had turned into an excuse to have a water fight. "Connor! That's COLD!"_

"_No it's not!" Connor lied. "It's warm Joie! It's really warm! Now make friends with Mr. Hose!"_

"_NO!" Joie started running even faster, shrieking when Connor caught up to him and sprayed him really good with the hose anyway. "Cooper! Cooper help me!"_

"_I'm a little busy at the moment!" Cooper replied. He was being chased by James, who was looking to dump the bucket of water he was holding right on top of Cooper's head. Cooper had unfortunately thrown all the water balloons he had gotten in the first place and James was not playing by the rules and letting him reload on his ammo. "God damn it Dad! This isn't fair!"_

"_All is fair in love and war!" James shot back._

_Cooper scowled and started running faster, hopping up on to the hood of the car and scrambling up on to the roof. Unfortunately he had forgotten it was still wet from what washing it had been given and he nearly killed himself slipping and falling off the thing._

"_Whoa!" James skidded to a stop and looked at Cooper in concern. "You okay?"_

"_Yeah," Cooper replied. He slowly got up to his feet. "I'm fi-DAAAAAD!" He just about jumped out of his skin as James promptly dumped his entire bucket of water over his head. He coughed and sputtered as goosebumps broke out over his entire body and he gave James a resentful glare. "Really Dad? Really?"_

"_What?" James said, trying to act a thousand times more innocent than he was. "I told you all was fair in love and war."_

_Cooper narrowed his eyes and launched himself at James, wrapping his limbs around him like some sort of monkey and putting the older man in a headlock. "Hey!" James yelled in surprise. He tried to pry Cooper off but Cooper wasn't going anywhere. "That's cheating!"_

"_All is fair in love and war, remember?"_

"_HELP ME!" Joie came careening around and hid behind them, ensuring that they both took a direct shot from Connor and the hose._

Cooper rolled out of bed and discarded his jacket before opening his window and escaping through it. He didn't know where he was going. He was just getting the fuck out. The sun was impossibly bright on his eyes and he had to squint and shield them with his hand as half ran half stumbled away from home. Out here if felt like he had jumped into a fire it was so hot but he could barely even feel it. He was too cold inside to feel anything beyond his own pain.

…

Six hours later and he was still walking. He had no idea where he really was and he could barely even stay up on his feet because he was weak from a combination of hunger and dehydration. Part of him wanted to pass the fuck out already but he couldn't. He didn't know why but he couldn't. So instead of passing out he kept going, not becoming aware of his surroundings until he nearly tripped over a homeless guy that was laying on the ground.

"Watch it asshole!"

Cooper blinked and stared at the guy dumbly before looking around. If Vegas had a ghetto this was probably technically it. He knew he had driven through it before with James when they really had no other choice. James never took him and Connor around these parts. He knew James hunted in this area at times but he absolutely refused to let the boys come around these parts. There were usually lots of shootings and stuff and there were also gangs and drugs and other shit that made James as a father say "stay the fuck away".

Cooper walked away from the homeless guy he stumbled on, going deeper into the neighborhood. He was so out of it he really didn't notice all the looks he was getting. Everyone that saw him was labeling him as a rich white boy that had strayed too far from home. Which really was the truth. He wasn't meant to be out here. This wasn't his world. He was meant to be home, being spoiled and not having to do a damn thing ever because he had a daddy who made more money than even the most successful drug dealers out here could even dream of getting.

"Yo! White boy! Don't I know you?"

Cooper stopped and looked at the direction the voice was coming from. It was Javier. Instantly his blood started to boil. He remembered damn well what Joie had told him about this piece of shit. Fucker tried to make Joie do things with him that he didn't want to do. God damn piece of shit. He remembered all too well the way Joie stiffened when he saw him and how he tried so hard to avoid telling him about what had happened. That shit had clearly scared him, even though he had tried so hard to play it off like it was nothing. Cooper remembered how badly he wanted to kill Javier when he found out and that feeling hadn't subsided one little bit. "I don't know. Do you?"

Javier frowned as Cooper stepped into the alley with him. "I asked you first white boy."

Cooper casually stuck his hands in his pockets so he could grab the knife he had with him. The weakness he had been feeling was gone, replaced now by the anger and the extreme need to kill. "Well how am I supposed to know if you know me? I can't read your mind."

Javier's eyes narrowed dangerously. "You've got a smart little mouth, you know that?"

"I've been told that."

"You know…" Javier's voice trailed off a bit as he sized Cooper up. "Smart mouths really don't last too long out here. Even if you are a big dog."

"I'm still going to last longer than you." That was all the warning Cooper gave before driving his knife into Javier's stomach. Javier's eyes widened and he stared down at the knife in shock. Cooper twisted the blade as much as he could before yanking it out and letting the other man fall to the ground. Blood was pouring out of Javier's mouth and he flopped around a bit before finally dying. Cooper watched with a blank expression on his face, not feeling any real joy in this death. Satisfaction? Yeah, as much as he could possibly feel right now. But joy? Hell no.

He was about to walk away when he caught something slightly sticking out of Javier's pocket. Curiosity got the better of him and he reached down took out what it was in there. It was a small baggie full of white powder. Cocaine was his guess, but quite honestly, his knowledge of drugs really only went as far as seeing them used on movies so it wasn't like he was one hundred percent sure about that. And it didn't really matter to him quite frankly. He stared at the substance for quite a long time before pocketing it and leaving the alley, not even bothering to discard Javier's body. So what if anyone found it? He didn't give a flying fuck. Nobody around him knew him and fucking Javier was a damn drug dealer anyway. Anybody could have killed him in a deal gone wrong. Or another drug dealer could have done it. Either way, nobody was going to cry about his loss.

He walked to the nearest park and went into the bathroom they had set up there for the kiddies to use if they had to go when they played. He flipped on the light so he could see and carefully poured the powder along the edge of the sink, so totally not thinking about what it was he was about to do. This was beyond any level of stupidity but he didn't care. He just stared at the white powder a little bit more before snorting it up, his eyes rolling up into the back of his head as he let the drug do it's work.

…

"COOPER!" James shouted at the top of his lungs as he looked around wildly. Night had fallen and Cooper had been missing for several hours now. James had gone into his room to try to make him come out and eat but Cooper had been gone. James of course had completely panicked. He had no idea how long Cooper had been gone and had absolutely no idea where he could have even went. "COOPER!"

Nothing. No answer. Not surprising really. He hadn't really been expecting to really get one. "Damn it." He shook his head and ran his hand through his hair. He was freaking out big time. His son was slipping through his fingers and there seemed to be absolutely nothing he could do about it. Everything he was trying was failing on an epic scale. It was killing him to have Cooper be so filled with this much grief and knowing that it could have been prevented. If he hadn't made Cooper go with him and Mark that night, Joie wouldn't have died and all this wouldn't be happening. Cooper had been right, this was his fault.

Three hours went by. He searched and searched but no luck was being had. He was freaking even more and wasn't doing a good job at hiding it. He couldn't even answer his phone every time Julie called to check on him he was so upset. "Come on Cooper please," he begged under his breath. "Please please please…"

He stared searching another park. He had searched a couple already but he hadn't been to this one yet. At least he didn't think he had. He was so exhausted and his nerves were so frayed he could have been wrong. "Cooper!" He looked around, not seeing anything at first. But then, just when he was about to leave, he saw his son stumbling out of the bathroom and nearly falling over in the process. "COOPER!"

Cooper didn't even look at him. He just stumbled forward more and then laid down on the ground, clutching at the grass like it was a blanket. "Cooper!" James ran to him and knelt down beside him, his stomach dropping as he looked into his eyes. Cooper was higher than a fucking kite.

"I can hear him. I can hear him. I can hear you I can I can I'm here," Cooper said, actually talking to the ground. "Joie I'm here! I'm here Joie I'm here. I'm here" He nuzzled his face against the ground and James watched him in shock, completely and totally dying on the inside.


	22. Chapter 22

"What the fuck did he take?" Mark asked as he came into Cooper's room without knocking. James had gotten Cooper home and in bed, where he had crashed hard and showed no signs of waking back up any time soon. James was sitting in the chair right next to Cooper's bed, hell bent on watching over him until he woke up. "Do you even have any idea?"

James shook his head. "He didn't have anymore on him when I checked."

"You check his arms for needle marks?"

James nodded. "I didn't find any. I found _these_ though." He carefully took Cooper's arm and rolled up his sleeve to show Mark the cuts that were now decorating the teenager's flesh.

"Jesus fuck," Mark muttered under his breath. He shook his head as James put the sleeve back down and let go of Cooper's arm. "You need to get the kid some serious professional help."

"I know." James rubbed his temples and looked at Cooper sadly. He knew he should have gotten Cooper help sooner but given how much of a fit Cooper had thrown about it when he merely suggested it, he had held off, not wanting to upset him and make things worse. But now though, if this was the stuff Cooper was going to do, professional help couldn't be an optional choice anymore. He was going to have to make Cooper go whether he liked it or not.

"You gonna stay in here all night?"

"Well _yeah_." James looked at Mark like he was an idiot. "What am I gonna do, leave him in here alone?"

"Well you could lock him in here and come to bed," Mark suggested. "I mean, I've only got two nights here this week…"

James just stared at Mark, knowing where that sentence was going and not able to believe he really thought now was the appropriate time for that. "I have to stay with Cooper," he said, trying to choose his words carefully so he wouldn't end up starting a fight. "He needs someone here with him." He knew Mark wasn't exactly pleased with that answer but James wasn't budging on it. Finally Mark just walked away, slamming the door shut behind him, which was completely unnecessary. James literally bit his tongue to keep himself from making some kind of snaky comment. _Not the time Lawson. Not the time._

He sighed loudly and leaned back in the chair so he could stretch his legs a bit. A glance at the clock told him it was nearly three in the morning. He was admittedly tired but there was no way he could even consider the possibility of going to sleep. First he would take care of Cooper and make sure he was okay and then he would worry about sleeping.

…

When Cooper finally woke up, he was dizzy and his head hurt so bad it took him a bit to even be able to see straight. He blinked several times, trying to clear the mental fog that was trying to drown him. What had happened? Where was he? It was soft where he was, he knew that. It was nice and soft and he wanted to just pass back out. Issue was though, the pain in his head was already too much to allow him to do so. So reluctantly he opened his eyes, wincing at the sunlight streaming in through the windows. He was in his room. How he had gotten there was a mystery to him until he saw James sitting by his bed. Then how he got home became a little bit clearer.

"Cooper…" James leaned forward, sighing in relief over the fact Cooper was awake and alert at least. Cooper looked like absolute hell though. His eyes were all bloodshot and his body was shivering, already craving more of whatever it was he took.

"How the fuck did you find me?" Cooper asked.

"I looked," James replied. "What the hell did you take?"

Cooper didn't answer that. Instead he started trying to roll off the bed, scowling when James reached over and stopped him. "Let go." He tried to swat James's hands away but James wasn't letting go. "Dad! Let go!"

"What did you take?" James asked again. He tightened his grip on Cooper, hell bent on not letting him go until he got some sort of answer out of him.

"Nothing!"

"Bullshit! I fucking found you higher than a fucking kite last night. Don't try to tell me you weren't on anything." James started pulling Cooper closer to him even though Cooper was still trying to fight him. "Please Cooper. Please let me help you."

"Like you fucking care." Cooper tried to rip himself away from James's grip. He didn't want to get any comfort from James. He had been getting it for awhile now and it hadn't done a fucking lick of good. The cocaine (he was still guessing it was cocaine anyway) though, THAT had done the trick. It had taken him away, made him not able to feel all his pain and he needed it. The pain was back and he needed the relief from it something scary. "You're not even my father."

James flinched a bit at those words but he refused to back down. "Biologically? No I'm not. But I am actually still fucking related to you and I fucking raised you as my own son and I will be _damned_ if I fucking let you kill yourself like this. You need help."

Cooper tried to shake his head in denial. He didn't like the way that sounded and now he had to get the hell out of it somehow. "Dad please, I'm sorry okay? I'm sorry. I didn't mean that shit. I'm sorry." The sudden backtracking wasn't fooling James and he could sense that. "I can get better by myself I promise."

"You need help," James repeated. "More help than I can give you obviously."

"So you want me to see a shrink?" Cooper's mood was swinging back towards anger and he scowled at James. "You think I'm going to talk to some kind of quack?" He snorted. "I'm not going."

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"You can't make me."

"Wanna bet?"

Even though deep down, he knew better, Cooper still folded his arms over his chest and gave James his best death glare. "I'm not going and that's final."

…

Three hours later, Cooper was sulking inside of Dr. Sullivan's office, his body shaking more and more because he was craving to feel last night's house once again. James had literally picked him up, threw him over his shoulder and physically forced him to come here. He had tried to fight. He really did. But James was too strong for him and he ended up here completely against his will. He did try to leave once he was let go but James had drug him right back and he was now waiting right outside the door, just in case Cooper tried it again.

Sighing loudly Cooper slumped down in his chair and glared at the woman sitting just a couple feet away from him. She was on the older side, definitely at least in her mid-fifties, with short graying hair and she was just looking back at him, seemingly waiting for him to do something. Well too bad for her. He sure as fuck wasn't planning on talking. Just because he had been dragged here didn't meant that he had to cooperate.

A long silence dragged by, only broken up at the sound of the clock ticking away. Cooper tried to sit still to show that he didn't give a shit about any of this. With every tick of the clock though, his body screamed for him to get up and leave. Just run and find a dealer and get himself some relief. That train of thought did raise the question though of where he would find a dealer. Javier had been the only person he knew that had anything and now he was dead. _It's Vegas though_, he reminded himself, taking a deep breath to relax himself. _It's fucking Vegas. I can fucking find someone to help me. I just gotta fucking look._

"Cooper do you know why you're here?" Apparently Dr. Sullivan was tired of the silence.

"Because my dad's an asshole," Cooper muttered.

"What was that?"

Cooper scowled and shook his head. "I said because my dad's an asshole."

Dr. Sullivan didn't look too fazed by those comments. "He's very worried about you."

"I'm sure he is," Cooper said sarcastically. He wasn't sure what James told this woman. She certainly had the look of knowing more about Cooper than she should and it served to piss him off even more.

"Cooper, boxing yourself in like this isn't going to help you."

"And talking to a stupid bitch like you isn't going to help me either." And that was all he said for the rest of the session.

…

Later that night, James tried to pull another all nighter and stay up with Cooper but he eventually passed out from exhaustion. Cooper immediately seized the opportunity and snuck out, tearing through the city like a madman until he found himself a dealer he could buy from. He threw a nice wad of cash the guy's way and snorted up the coke in a gas station bathroom. From there it was oblivion until he woke up in somebody else's bed, the taste of stale alcohol in his mouth and a hangover to boot. The twink he didn't remember picking up from the bar he barely remembered was laying next to him still fast asleep. Cooper immediately just bailed, not even waking the guy up to say he was going. The guy meant nothing to him anyway so why would he bother with that?

When he got home, he expected to get yelled at immediately by James. He didn't though. Not by James anyway. Julie gave him hell while Mark just gave him an annoyed look and Connor tried to ask him where he had been. He put up with all that for about two minutes and then ran upstairs, where he found James actually nailing his window shut so he couldn't open it anymore. "Are you fucking kidding me?" he asked angrily. "What the hell is this for?"

James shook his head. "This is ending Cooper. Before you fucking get in too fucking deep." He finished what he was doing and then turned to give Cooper his full attention. "You have to stop this."

"No, YOU have to stop," Cooper countered. "Fuck you Dad. What the fuck gives you the right-"

"You're MY son and this is MY house! THAT is what gives me the right." The tone of James's voice silenced Cooper for a bit and James tried to take advantage of that. "Cooper _please_. What you're doing now isn't the fucking way."

"It fucking helps," Cooper growled.

"For _now_. It'll stop eventually. What are you going to do then?"

Cooper didn't have an answer. He just stormed off and locked himself in the bathroom, pretty much just pouting for a couple of hours before coming out and not speaking to James for the rest of the night.

…

It felt like Cooper was literally being kept prisoner in his own home and he hated it beyond the telling of it. Not only were his windows nailed shut but he was being watched over constantly by James and Julie. Even Connor was jumping in though he didn't really get why it was being done. Anything sharp was taken out of Cooper's reach; he couldn't even shave now without direct supervision. Being treated like a complete child combined with his newly formed drug craving that wasn't being satisfied was turning Cooper into a complete monster. He yelled and screamed at pretty much everyone, so furious with them all he lashed out as meanly as he possibly could. With all the insults that came flying out of him though and as many feelings as he knew he had to be hurting, none of it made him feel better. The one thing that would was the thing they were keeping him from and he had to push them away to get it. They said they cared, that they wanted to make him better but yet they wouldn't let him have what would actually help him. They wanted him to just deal with his emotions and get over it but he couldn't. It was too much for him. His grief had already consumed him and tore him apart from the inside. He couldn't keep going on like this. If he couldn't be allowed to make it better then he had to just make it end. He had to make it all end.

The question though was, how exactly he was going to do that. It took him a bit to figure that out. Then, one night about a week later, after waking up from another nightmare that involved him reliving Joie's death over and over again. Mark kept a gun in his and James's room. James usually made him keep it up on the highest shelf in the closet and they had had plenty of fights about it because James didn't want it in the house at all (he was worried about Connor finding it) but as far as Cooper knew, it was still there. It surprised him that he hadn't thought of it sooner. But then again, it belonged to Mark. He generally avoided Mark related things if at all possible.

Given how much he was being watched, he couldn't do anything right away like he wanted to. He had to wait until the next afternoon, where an opportunity came up that he couldn't pass up. Spot must have gotten into something that he wasn't supposed to because he started throwing up all over the place, which distracted James just enough to allow Cooper to grab Connor and pull him aside.

"Connor I need you to do something for me," he whispered, putting his hand over Connor's mouth to keep him quiet. "Can you help me?"

Connor nodded, all too eager to please his big brother. "I can do it Coopy! I can do ANYTHING Coopy I can-"

Cooper clamped his hand back on Connor's mouth to shut him up once again. "Okay okay. I get it. Just shush and distract Dad for me, will you?"

Connor frowned. "You don't want to play with me and Daddy anymore?"

Cooper resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "I just need to be alone for awhile okay? And Dad won't leave me alone which is why I need _you_ to distract him. "Now can you do that for me? Pleeeease?"

"Okay Coopy."

"Good boy." Cooper watched Connor run off and then waited for the loud crash that soon followed before sneaking off upstairs to James's room. He carefully shut the door behind him and headed straight to the closet, hearing the sounds of James and Connor both yelling downstairs. He couldn't quite tell what was being said but that was okay. James seemed thoroughly distracted so it was okay.

He searched the closet as fast as he could, finding the gun hidden behind a bunch of shoe boxes. It wasn't loaded though, which made Cooper curse loudly under his breath. The search began for the bullets, which were only found when he accidentally knocked one of the shoe boxes over and they fell out of it. "Shit!" He quickly bent down and loaded the gun up, kicking the leftover bullets underneath the dresser.

"Coopy!" Connor yelled. "Cooopy!"

Cooper barely even heard Connor's voice. He was much more focused on staring at the gun, which currently felt extremely heavy in his hand. It felt like time had slowed down for him. There wasn't a part of him trying to reconsider what he was planning. Oh no, that wasn't on his list of things to do. No, the only reason there was any hesitation on his part was because the last nightmare he had flashed through his mind, making him shiver uncontrollably.

"_Joie!" Cooper was running down the blood soaked streets, his heart pounding away wildly inside of his chest. "Joie!" He had to find Joie. He had to find him he had to get to him before it was too late. "JOIE!" He wasn't getting an answer and it was freaking him out. "JOIE!" He forced himself to run faster and faster, not stopping until he tripped and fell, busting his own face on the ground. He groaned in pain and very slowly sat up, faltering when he saw that he had somehow gotten to Joie's grave without even realizing it. "Oh god…" He spat out a mouthful of blood and tried to swallow down the lump that had risen in his throat. "Joie…" He reached out to trace Joie's gravestone with his fingertips, tears welling up in the back of his eyes already._

"_You should have been there."_

_Cooper gasped and turned around at the voice. "Joie?"_

_Joie was standing just a half a foot away, in the exact same condition he was in the night he was killed. "You should have been there Cooper." His tone was what told Cooper how angry Joie was because it sure as hell couldn't be told by his face. His face was marred by blood, bruises and the dangling eyeball, which made Cooper cringe majorly. "You should have been there with me Cooper. You should have saved me."_

"_I know." Cooper got up to his feet and shook his head. "I'm sorry Joie I'm sorry-"_

"_You let me die alone." Joie's voice hardened even more. "If you really loved me how could you let me die alone?"_

_Cooper recoiled, his head hanging down in shame. "Joie please…"_

"_Fix it Cooper. Come to me. Don't let me be alone anymore. Don't-_"

"Coopy!" Connor's shrill voice became even louder as he burst into James's room. "Coopy I distracted Daddy but now he's MAD cuz Spot stepped on the broken glass and hurted his paw and now you have to-" he stopped mid-sentence when it dawned on him that he had just walked in on Cooper holding a gun up to his head, his finger dangerously close to the trigger. "Coopy what are you doing?"

"Nothing," Cooper said quickly. "Go deal with Dad."

Connor pouted his lower lip and his eyes narrowed angrily. "That is NOT nothing. Why do you get to play with the new toy and I don't?"

_He thinks it's a toy? Oh lord…_ "Connor it's not-HEY!" Connor had grabbed a hold of his wrist and was actually trying to take the gun out of his hand. "Connor god damn it!" He tried to shove Connor away with his free hand. "It's not a fucking toy you idiot!"

"Liar!" Connor yelled. He was trying even harder to get the gun and was kicking Cooper's knee to try to make him let go. "Liar liar liar liar liar li-'

BANG!

Connor screamed and fell back and Cooper's eyes just about popped out of his head He should have grabbed Connor and immediately started checking him over but he couldn't. He just sat there dumbly, watching Connor clutch at his shoulder and just shriek at the top of his lungs.

"CONNOR!" James came barreling up the stairs and skidded into the room to find Connor a crying mess on the floor and Cooper holding a gun in his hands. "COOPER!"

The gun was going back up towards Cooper's head but James was there in a flash, knocking it away and then slapping Cooper across the face as hard as he possibly could. "What the HELL are you doing?" He scooped Connor up into one arm and grabbed Cooper by the shirt with his other hand, shaking him as hard as he could. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?"

Cooper couldn't answer that. He just kept his mouth shut and completely shriveled up in shame.


	23. Chapter 23

Connor had to be rushed to the hospital and James dragged Cooper along for the ride. It wasn't like he could keep him home alone. Cooper didn't say a single word the entire time. He didn't have the guts to. James was absolutely furious with him. He wasn't yelling anymore at least but Cooper knew that it was going to come again. There was no way it couldn't. The fury was literally rolling off him in waves. The only reason Cooper could think of as to why he wasn't getting screamed at was because they needed to stay somewhat calm for Connor. He had screamed himself hoarse and was now just crying and complaining that he didn't feel good. "Ow ow ow ow!" Connor whimpered as Cooper tried to put more pressure on the wound. "Stooooop Coopy!"

"Connor-"

"Fucking be careful with him!" James hissed angrily. He shot a glare back at Cooper before totally running a stop sign and narrowly avoiding a wreck with the car that did have the right to go through the intersection.

"I'm trying," Cooper said weakly. He had to put more pressure on the wound though, despite Connor's protests. The bleeding had to be stopped. He had lost quite a bit already and Connor's attempts to wriggle away from him were doing nothing to help. "Connor please," he whispered, trying to keep his voice low enough so James wouldn't hear him. "Let me help you."

Connor just stared at him distrustfully. What he understood that he was hurt and that Cooper was responsible. That was a hard one for him to take well, considering how much he practically worshipped the ground Cooper walked on. "Connor please," Cooper pleaded again. "Let me help you." He carefully put more pressure on Connor's wound, wincing as Connor whimpered because he was sure James was going to pull over and throttle the fuck out of him. Thankfully though, Connor quieted down and let Cooper help him until they got to the hospital.

Once they were there James carried Connor inside while dragging Cooper along with him. Cooper tried to drag his feet because he really had no idea what James planned on doing to him. Connor had gotten shot during his suicide attempt. Would James tell the truth and have him thrown in the psych ward? That was a bit more of a real possibility now. James had been bending over backwards to keep an eye on him and it had all been to Cooper's dismay. And clearly, it hadn't been enough. If Cooper was that bound and determined to off himself then James really had no choice but to put him in the psych ward-which was the last thing Cooper wanted. The house arrest James had put him under was bad enough. The last thing he wanted was a fucking psych ward.

Question was, how did he avoid it at this point? There was no way that James was really gonna chase him around and constantly keep an eye on him now. Not after this. James had gone up ahead to put Connor on a stretcher they got out for him and he was talking to the doctors and nurses. Cooper had hung back enough so that he couldn't hear what it was they were saying but he had this feeling that James was selling him out. And why shouldn't he? Cooper saw no reason for James to lie for him. It wasn't like he was gonna change any time soon. He still wanted to die. He still wanted to go out and do drugs. He still wanted the freedom to bury his unhappiness rather than dealing with it. Dealing with it was much too painful. He couldn't do it.

Without even realizing it he started backing up towards the door. James's attention was still diverted. It was now or never. Cooper bolted out the doors and ran as fast as he possibly could. He didn't hear the sound of anyone chasing after him and that spurred him on faster so he wouldn't be anywhere in sight when someone did come after him.

He wasn't even paying attention to where he was going. He crossed the street and narrowly avoided getting hit by a car. He ran behind a donut shop and hopped a fence, ripping the leg of his pants when they got caught on the damn thing. He ran through people's backyards, getting several yells from angry men and screams from the women and children. All that went in one ear and out the other though. He just kept running and running, not stopping until his legs literally gave out on him. He fell to the ground hard, scraping up his face because he didn't get his hands out in time to catch himself.

_Fuck…_ He stayed down for several minutes, wheezing as he tried to catch his breath. When he could finally breathe properly, he forced himself back up and look around. He had no idea where he even was. He reached into his pockets and found that he didn't have his wallet with him. Fuck. That meant he had no money. He momentarily thought about going back home and getting it but he realized that that was way too risky. He then thought about going to get high. That was too risky too though. James had to notice he was gone now and if he stuck around and got high that would increase the chances that he would be found. The only logical thing for him to do was to keep going.

He started running again and ran out of breath much quicker this time. He needed a better idea than this. He leaned up against the nearest building and looked around as he caught his breath once again. Across the street he could see a crappy looking car sitting there completely abandoned. It literally looked like it would break down at any second but it was good enough for him right now. He glanced around to make sure that nobody else was around before darting across the street to the car. The door was surprisingly unlocked so he got right in and hotwired it, his hands shaking so bad that it took longer than it should have. He finally got it going though and he put his foot firmly on the gas, getting the hell out of there as fast as he possibly could.


	24. Chapter 24

_6 months later_

"Daddy did you find him yet?" was the question that Connor asked yet again, his voice still hopeful as ever. It had been six months since Cooper had disappeared and James had been stretching himself to the limit trying to find him. He had hired a slew of private detectives while actually going out and doing some of his own searches but none of it had gotten him anywhere. It was like Cooper had just vanished off the face of the earth.

James sighed and very reluctantly shook his head. "No. Not yet."

Connor's face fell and James winced, just feeling absolutely horrible. He was trying his very best to get Cooper home and he wanted Connor to know that but Connor didn't really understand it. Cooper's disappearance was taking a toll on him. James hadn't realized just how dependent Connor was on his big brother until he went away. Connor didn't want to eat, play or do much of anything anymore. All he wanted to do was help find Cooper.

"Why did he leave Daddy?" Connor climbed up on James's lap as he sat down and rested his head on his chest. "Does he hate us now?"

James shook his head again and kissed the top of Connor's head. "No. He's just…he doesn't know what he's doing right now." He didn't know what else to say. He didn't even want to imagine all the possibilities of what Cooper could have possibly gotten himself into. A grief stricken drug addicted teenager out on his own spelled disaster no matter which way it was sliced. He needed to be found before something really bad happened-assuming it already hadn't. He was trying not to think about the possibility, but there was a very good chance that Cooper had died already and it was just a matter of time before his body turned up. He didn't know what he would do then. It was bad enough having lost his son for this long already he didn't know what he would do if he was dead.

"He'll come back though, right?" Connor was staring at him with the widest, saddest eyes that he had ever seen in his life, which only served to make him feel even worse (and he honestly hadn't thought that was possible). "You'll get him to come back, right Daddy?"

"Of course I will," James promised. Deep down he knew he shouldn't be making that kind of promise because he wasn't sure if he could actually keep it. He couldn't help himself though. Connor was already upset enough he didn't want to add to it. "Once I find him I'll get him home. I promise."

…

"YO! Hak what the hell are you doing?" Tommy Dreamer asked impatiently as he, Beulah and Spike Dudley were loading up the boxes of t-shirts into the truck. Since ECW was NOT a big time promotion by any means, the wrestlers themselves often found themselves doing different jobs to help out. The job tonight was to load the t-shirts up and make sure they got shipped to where they needed to go. They had gotten about halfway done when Sandman suddenly stopped and looked around, his brow furrowed and his cigarette clenched tightly in his teeth.

"Jim come on," Beulah said, shivering slightly from the cold even though she had on Tommy's coat. It was almost Christmas time and the snow and the bitter cold had hit Philadelphia big time. "I want to get out of here."

Sandman didn't answer her. He just held out his hand to shush them and looked around some more. He had thought he heard something and he was trying to see if he heard it again. And he did. He almost didn't but whatever it was knocked over a trash can and completely gave itself away. "What the fuck…" He followed the sound, expecting to see a stray dog or a homeless man or something like that. What he found instead was battered and bloodied teenaged boy curled up on the ground and shivering like crazy. His shirt hanging on by just a couple of shreds and his lips and fingers were starting to turn blue. "Holy fucking shit!"

"What?" Tommy put down the box he was holding and walked over to where Sandman was standing. "What is-shiiit." He went over to the kid and knelt down beside him, actually checking his pulse before taking off his coat and putting it over him.

"Who the hell is that?" Spike asked as he and Beulah came to investigate.

Sandman shook his head as Tommy tried to help the poor kid up. "I have no idea."

"I think he needs a hospital," Tommy announced, cursing loudly when the kid's legs buckled on him and he lost his grip on him. "Hak could you help me?"

Sandman walked over to him and helped get the kid back on his feet, the both of them pretty much just picking him up when he tried to fall back down again. They both could feel every single one of his ribs with the arms they had wrapped around his side and Sandman noticed JUST how gaunt the kid's face was. There was no telling how long it had been since he had last ate. "Spike start the car," he ordered gruffly. "Beulah get the door."

Spike and Beulah both ran off and did what he said. Beulah opened the door and moved the passenger's seat forward so he and Tommy could squeeze into the back with the kid. Once they were in she moved her seat back so she could get in and Spike started driving as soon as she slammed her door shut. "Where exactly is the nearest hospital?"

Tommy just looked at him incredulously. "Seriously? We've only driven you there like a THOUSAND times."

"Yeah, and I'M usually so out of it that I'm not paying a lick of attention," Spike replied in his defense. "So quit giving me crap and direct me."

"No…" The kid's voice was so weak that they didn't hear him at first. "No no no…" He tried to climb over Tommy's lap and reach for the door. "No hospal…no hos-pi-tal…" He was so weak he had trouble even forming the words. "Please…"

"Kid relax," Tommy said as he gently pulled him back away from the door. "You gotta go to the hospital."

"No." He tried to weakly push Tommy away before clinging to Sandman and tugging at his shirt with whatever strength he had left. "Don't please I'm fine. I'm fine I'm fine please I'm fine."

Nobody was buying that one for a second. They had no reason to. It was clear as day that he was sick, mostly likely with hypothermia due to the cold. Spike had cranked the heat on full blast and Tommy was trying to wrap his coat around the kid more tightly but it was hard to tell if it was doing much good at all. His gaunt face was a mirage of bruises and dried blood and he eventually passed out, causing Tommy to check for a pulse again because they were sure for a moment that he was actually dead. He wasn't though. His breathing was weak and there was a chance it wouldn't be long but he hadn't passed on yet. That was hopefully a good sign.

"What are we going to do when we get him there?" Beulah asked. "Are we going to like stay there and make sure he's going to be okay?" Or are we going to leave him there?"

The boys all exchanged looks. "Well…we don't even know him," Spike pointed out. "As long as we get him there we don't actually have to stay there, do we?"

"Not necessarily," Tommy conceded. "I'm not sure how right that is though. I mean, would that feel right to anyone else? Just leaving him there? He might not have anyone else."

"I don't know why it has to be our problem," Sandman said honestly. "We're doing more for him now than most other people would. We don't have to spend our entire night in the hospital for some kid we don't even know."

Beulah pursed her lips, clearly bothered by that. Tommy noticed that and reached forwards so he could grab one of her hands and squeeze it in his. "If we don't stay with him we could come back in the morning to check on him," he suggested. "See if he's alright."

She nodded, seemingly more okay with that answer. They drove the rest of the way in silence, Spike nearly getting into a wreck at one point because he hit a patch of ice. He managed to regain control of the vehicle though and when they got to the hospital, Tommy and Sandman carried him inside while Beulah led the way and Spike went to park the car. The doctors and nurses had about a million questions for them, barely of any that they could answer. When the questions finally stopped they left, Beulah being the most reluctant to go. Tommy had to renew the promise that they would come back in the morning and point out that he was probably not going to be allowed to have any visitors until then anyway. They had no idea how much work needed to be done with him and there was no real sense in staying the entire night in the hospital for someone they didn't even know. Hopefully for him, he had some sort of I.D. on him and the doctors could get a hold of his family to come and help take care of him. He definitely needed someone to do it.


End file.
